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Author Topic: Dealing with arrogant/superior students  (Read 9075 times)
verdell
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« on: November 15, 2008, 2:53:07 pm »

How do you guys deal with extremely arrogant and superior students? I have a hard time not letting their comments get under my skin.  And then I dwell on it for hours after the fact.  Turning the conversation over and over in my head and then it makes me madder that I'm even thinking about it!

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erictho
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« Reply #1 on: November 15, 2008, 3:08:08 pm »

This is a "do as I say, not as I do" situation for me. I too let arrogant students get under my skin, and I obsess about it, and I sometimes even let them goad me into thinking they're right and I'm wrong. It's not fun. I think I heard it (or something similar) described as an "echo chamber of negativity" (I think maybe even here on the threads).

But, what I've been encouraged to do and what I try to do is just let it go. I find if I vent to a friend, especially someone who knows Arrogant Student, it can help, since the friend reminds me that I'm not actually a fraud and that Arrogant Student is in fact a jerk. So, I'd suggest a quick vent, a pat on the back for yourself, and a re-direction of energy to something more productive. Good luck!
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erictho speaks the truth
elsie
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« Reply #2 on: November 15, 2008, 3:29:41 pm »

The most important thing to remember is that 99% of the time, these behaviors are not about you at all. You just happen to be present in their lives in a particular role that brings out issues that they haven't learned to deal with. Scratch the arrogant and superior student, and you'll find someone with deep insecurities in a desperate disguise.
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"People assume that time is a strict progression from cause to effect. But actually, from a non-linear, non-subjective viewpoint, it's more like a big ball of wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey stuff." - the Doctor
anakin
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Goes to 11


« Reply #3 on: November 15, 2008, 3:34:11 pm »

Scratch the arrogant and superior student, and you'll find someone with deep insecurities in a desperate disguise.
...which just happens to describe about half the 18-23-year-old cohort. I know I was that insecure and [cringe] sometimes arrogant. The only difference is, I didn't leave an email trail, for which I am grateful to the Flying Spaghetti Monster each and every day.
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jackalope
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« Reply #4 on: November 16, 2008, 12:26:52 am »

I give them sh*tty grades for arbitrary reasons. Hilarity ensues!
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boolos
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« Reply #5 on: November 16, 2008, 12:37:04 am »

Something like this?

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/40984
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jackalope
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« Reply #6 on: November 16, 2008, 12:49:59 am »

Boolos, I like the cut of your jib.
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mended_drum
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« Reply #7 on: November 16, 2008, 12:59:29 am »

I'm afraid that I find arrogance in undergraduates hysterically funny, and I have to conjugate verbs in my head to keep from bursting into laughter when they start acting as if they're superior, either to me or to their fellow students.  Their certitude is just so darn cute. 

Of course, that's my own arrogance speaking, which is why I keep relentless control of my emotions until I get back to my office.  In class, I try to respond with patience when they challenge me, less  patience when they cop an attitude toward other students.
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"dr. mended_drum don't give a sh!t; she will chew me up like a cobra."
yemaya
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« Reply #8 on: November 16, 2008, 8:54:44 am »

The most important thing to remember is that 99% of the time, these behaviors are not about you at all. You just happen to be present in their lives in a particular role that brings out issues that they haven't learned to deal with. Scratch the arrogant and superior student, and you'll find someone with deep insecurities in a desperate disguise.

Yup.  And the ones I've run across like this have never been superior students.  They've been the ones who claimed to have a 4.0, but whose performance in my class is average to mediocre and who are likely lying about their grades.  No doubt these are the kids who were told that they were brilliant and special all their lives and everyone in their lives were so worried about harming their self-esteem that they failed to help the kid develop the self-confidence it takes to take constructive criticism, make mistakes, etc.
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Historians are gossips who tease the dead.  ~Voltaire
bell_bottom_blues
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« Reply #9 on: November 16, 2008, 11:23:50 am »

They've been the ones who claimed to have a 4.0, but whose performance in my class is average to mediocre and who are likely lying about their grades. 

At my uni, we can check this. Thanks for the reminder, Yemaya. Next time my favorite arrogant student sends me a snotty email, I'll check his GPA. That should give me a good enough laugh to forget the whole thing.
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amlithist
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« Reply #10 on: November 16, 2008, 11:33:52 am »


At my uni, we can check this. Thanks for the reminder, Yemaya. Next time my favorite arrogant student sends me a snotty email, I'll check his GPA. That should give me a good enough laugh to forget the whole thing.


Or to respond with an e-mail letting him know that you know his GPA. . . .
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Every person you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about.  Be kind, always.
locutus
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« Reply #11 on: November 16, 2008, 1:01:12 pm »

Outwardly arrogant students can be a source of amusement. That Onion article sums it up nicely. What I find annoying are the ones who use fake humility and won't even own up to their own arrogance. I just find it condescending. It's difficult for me to resist rolling my eyes and making snarky comments.
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mountain_ivy
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« Reply #12 on: November 16, 2008, 3:18:17 pm »


At my uni, we can check this. Thanks for the reminder, Yemaya. Next time my favorite arrogant student sends me a snotty email, I'll check his GPA. That should give me a good enough laugh to forget the whole thing.


Or to respond with an e-mail letting him know that you know his GPA. . . .

Careful with letting him know you checked.  FERPA is a need-to-know basis.  I think you do have a neede; just handle with care.
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canadatourismguy
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« Reply #13 on: November 16, 2008, 3:38:59 pm »

Just remember that arrogance is sometimes used as a defense mechanism for someone who feels intimidated or is lacking confidence. 

CTG
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On preview:  Candadiantourismguy is a subversive of the first order.
spork
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« Reply #14 on: November 16, 2008, 10:18:34 pm »


At my uni, we can check this. Thanks for the reminder, Yemaya. Next time my favorite arrogant student sends me a snotty email, I'll check his GPA. That should give me a good enough laugh to forget the whole thing.


Or to respond with an e-mail letting him know that you know his GPA. . . .

Careful with letting him know you checked.  FERPA is a need-to-know basis.  I think you do have a neede; just handle with care.

FERPA schmerpa. FERPA does not grant injunctive relief to individuals.
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