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Author Topic: Bang Your Head on Your Desk - the thread of teaching despair!  (Read 2251027 times)
bioteacher
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Confused and sad. Or happy. I'm not sure...


« Reply #5145 on: April 03, 2012, 7:53:18 pm »

I kan't spell. I'm grading stuph and it be killing brain cells!
But it was written in my best Princess Bride Channeling effort.
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Lifesaving dream crusher and member of the Real vs. Zeal club.
cc_alan
is a wossname
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Caution! Nekkid Zamboni driver ahead.


« Reply #5146 on: April 03, 2012, 7:55:25 pm »

I kan't spell. I'm grading stuph and it be killing brain cells!
But it was written in my best Princess Bride Channeling effort.

Me too!

Alan
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Guess what? I got a fever and the only prescription is MORE COWBELL!
mystictechgal
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One step at a time


« Reply #5147 on: April 03, 2012, 9:44:55 pm »

I just got an email from one my pre-nursing students. She had a sore throat yesterday and so decided to try a home remedy of salt water. However, based on her email she drank rather than gargled with the salt water and did not drink any other water afterwards! So now she will be missing class because she feels she is about to pass out from dehydration. This semester's class is not giving me confidence for our health care facilities in the future.

Um, My only experience with drinking salt water is from being a SCUBA diver and occasionally getting a gulp or more. (I'm smart enough to know how to gargle with it for a sore throat.) This seems wrong to me. It seems to me that long before you've taken in enough salt water to feel any effects of dehydration you're doubled over with cramps and vomiting. Now, the effect of that might well be those of dehydration, but the stuff leading up to it is so memorable that I'd think that would be the complaint used to miss another class, not the dehydration. By the time you're done with those after-effects simple dehydration feels like a relief.

I'm thinking this one gets an F on multiple levels.
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secundem_artem
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« Reply #5148 on: April 03, 2012, 10:48:19 pm »

I just got an email from one my pre-nursing students. She had a sore throat yesterday and so decided to try a home remedy of salt water. However, based on her email she drank rather than gargled with the salt water and did not drink any other water afterwards! So now she will be missing class because she feels she is about to pass out from dehydration. This semester's class is not giving me confidence for our health care facilities in the future.

Um, My only experience with drinking salt water is from being a SCUBA diver and occasionally getting a gulp or more. (I'm smart enough to know how to gargle with it for a sore throat.) This seems wrong to me. It seems to me that long before you've taken in enough salt water to feel any effects of dehydration you're doubled over with cramps and vomiting. Now, the effect of that might well be those of dehydration, but the stuff leading up to it is so memorable that I'd think that would be the complaint used to miss another class, not the dehydration. By the time you're done with those after-effects simple dehydration feels like a relief.

I'm thinking this one gets an F on multiple levels.

Wait till she gets to acid-base disorders in nursing school.  Both respiratory and metabolic acidosis/alkalosis and every patient she sees will have a compensatory acidosis for an alkalosis and vice versa.  'Lytes and fluids are cake compared to acid-base.  Salt water is gonna be the least of her problems.
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In my opinion, Secundem_artem is precisely correct. 

I think secundem_artem, rather, has hit the nail on the head.
mythbuster
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« Reply #5149 on: April 04, 2012, 10:03:27 am »

Quote
Wait till she gets to acid-base disorders in nursing school.  Both respiratory and metabolic acidosis/alkalosis and every patient she sees will have a compensatory acidosis for an alkalosis and vice versa.  'Lytes and fluids are cake compared to acid-base.  Salt water is gonna be the least of her problems.

I will report that salt water girl missed 8 am lecture but made it to 2 pm lab, where she seemed to be doing ok. She's not doing very well in my course, so it's unlikely that she'll make it to your great example of acid-base disorders. One of the big hurdles for the pre-nursing students is they all cling to the notion that since they are not science majors, their courses will be easier than those for Bio majors. I give examples like the one above to try and disprove that notion.
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mathspice
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« Reply #5150 on: April 04, 2012, 12:47:21 pm »

Due to banging my head on desk, I decided to try this tactic. I shall reward those who DO follow the course policies and/or have made significant improvement in their grade. Wish me luck and feel free to use!

http://dl.dropbox.com/u/65837276/FB%20Like%20coupon.pdf

P.S. Could someone give me a refresher on how to post links nicely without giving the full name of the file? Like you smarty smarty forumites do?
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I'm teaching about honey, vinegar, and professionalism by example and it seems to work better for me than an exposition.
mathspice
On the elitist poop-head scale from 1-5, we give this
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« Reply #5151 on: April 04, 2012, 4:15:50 pm »

Due to banging my head on desk, I decided to try this tactic. I shall reward those who DO follow the course policies and/or have made significant improvement in their grade. Wish me luck and feel free to use!

http://dl.dropbox.com/u/65837276/FB%20Like%20coupon.pdf

P.S. Could someone give me a refresher on how to post links nicely without giving the full name of the file? Like you smarty smarty forumites do?

Put [ url=nasty looking address] the text you want [/ url] without the spaces in the brackets.

To see the example, use the quote box to look at useful coupon.

Thank you, Polly_mer! I will try it here:

If you'd like to see my "Like" coupons, click here.

Yay! I think it works! Thanks, again.
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I'm teaching about honey, vinegar, and professionalism by example and it seems to work better for me than an exposition.
lizardmom1
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« Reply #5152 on: April 05, 2012, 2:50:10 pm »

WARNING: In this post, there is a long rant ahead. Continue to read at your own risk!

WHY, oh why can't graduate students follow basic instructions for a major assignment? Can't they read the directions that are clearly written? Can't they listen in class when the instructor spoon feeds them by going over the directions, step by step?

And, why can't they accept responsibility for their own choices instead of taking out on us via the "customer satisfaction surveys" the low grade they must know they are EARNING!?
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Lizardmom1
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« Reply #5153 on: April 06, 2012, 4:43:26 pm »

WHY, oh why can't graduate students follow basic instructions for a major assignment? Can't they read the directions that are clearly written? Can't they listen in class when the instructor spoon feeds them by going over the directions, step by step?
I have finally (after more than 10 years of college teaching) realized that the answers to your last two questions are both "no".

The thing is, I don't know that I was any better in grad school—and I'm not sure if very many of us were. Time, though, makes the hard edges a little softer, and so we tend to think that things are worse now than they used to be. However, given some of the complaints about students you get throughout the history of education, I doubt that's actually true.

Of course, that's cold comfort, and I think the complaining is worthwhile, even if only to let others know they're not alone.
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senay
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« Reply #5154 on: April 06, 2012, 5:52:39 pm »


I have a young student (in age and in maturity) who has methodically failed to earn most of the points in my freshman comp class.  I urged him to drop a few weeks ago before the deadline, and he told me a complicated reason about why he had to stay in the course.  In our last session I gave my short lecture on a concept and then passed out a worksheet for students to practice the new concept in pairs.  I went from group to group checking the work and making suggestions.  When I get to this student, he has nothing written on his worksheet.  He looks at me and says, "I don't have a pen."  I announce to the rest of the class, "Could someone loan X a pen?"  Someone immediately does.

Why, why, why this student is still even coming to class is a mystery to me.
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I have measured out my life with coffee spoons.
octoprof
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Love your loved ones while you can.


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« Reply #5155 on: April 06, 2012, 7:18:22 pm »


I have a young student (in age and in maturity) who has methodically failed to earn most of the points in my freshman comp class.  I urged him to drop a few weeks ago before the deadline, and he told me a complicated reason about why he had to stay in the course.  In our last session I gave my short lecture on a concept and then passed out a worksheet for students to practice the new concept in pairs.  I went from group to group checking the work and making suggestions.  When I get to this student, he has nothing written on his worksheet.  He looks at me and says, "I don't have a pen."  I announce to the rest of the class, "Could someone loan X a pen?"  Someone immediately does.

Why, why, why this student is still even coming to class is a mystery to me.

Magical thinking.
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gwydion
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« Reply #5156 on: April 06, 2012, 7:21:40 pm »


I have a young student (in age and in maturity) who has methodically failed to earn most of the points in my freshman comp class.  I urged him to drop a few weeks ago before the deadline, and he told me a complicated reason about why he had to stay in the course.  In our last session I gave my short lecture on a concept and then passed out a worksheet for students to practice the new concept in pairs.  I went from group to group checking the work and making suggestions.  When I get to this student, he has nothing written on his worksheet.  He looks at me and says, "I don't have a pen."  I announce to the rest of the class, "Could someone loan X a pen?"  Someone immediately does.

Why, why, why this student is still even coming to class is a mystery to me.

Maybe the reason he didn't bring a pen was because he thought you would be teaching finger painting that session.  He certainly doesn't sound like he was ready for 2nd grade let alone college.
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Forget about world peace....Visualize using your turn signal
barcrossliar
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« Reply #5157 on: April 08, 2012, 9:22:01 am »

I just got an email from a student who missed the first two exams, had a plagiarism F on a paper, and was absent the last 3 of 4 classes.  She wanted to turn in a paper late. 

I'm sure that her thinking is that she still has a CHANCE to pass.  Yes, there's also a CHANCE that I'll win the MacArthur "genius award," but since I have shown any signs of genius, it shouldn't influence any decisions I make.

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Every educated person's not a plumb greenhorn.

"where whining mendeth nothing, wherefore whine?"--R.L. Stevenson

+-LR is wise. Listen.
geonerd
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Do not take the bait.


« Reply #5158 on: April 08, 2012, 2:17:43 pm »

WARNING: In this post, there is a long rant ahead. Continue to read at your own risk!

WHY, oh why can't graduate students follow basic instructions for a major assignment? Can't they read the directions that are clearly written? Can't they listen in class when the instructor spoon feeds them by going over the directions, step by step?

And, why can't they accept responsibility for their own choices instead of taking out on us via the "customer satisfaction surveys" the low grade they must know they are EARNING!?

When you find the answer, please let me know.
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anakin
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Goes to 11


« Reply #5159 on: April 08, 2012, 7:18:07 pm »

I am reading the second draft of research papers.  The only bright side at this point is how much easier the grading is when the grade is "zero, minimal change from previous draft with several major comments ignored".  The downside is documenting the new plagiarism.

Deep, long, sigh.
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There are few things more liberating in this life than having your worst fear realized. -- Conan O'Brien
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