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Author Topic: favorite student sentences, winter/spring 2012 edition  (Read 190907 times)
mystictechgal
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One step at a time


« Reply #255 on: March 13, 2012, 8:51:35 PM »

"There is some part of the human brain asphyxiated with outlandish ways to die."

(I think the student meant "fixated on" but "asphyxiated with" is almost appropriate!)

While clicking through channels, I ended up watching a portion of something called "1000 Ways to Die" last night. The ways they showed people dying were quite outlandish, and I'm pretty sure some of my brain cells died in the process. Whether they were asphyxiated, or just died from neglect, I'm not certain.
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You must realize that a university cannot educate you. You must do that for yourself, although a college or university is the place where it is likely that you can study most efficiently.
http://www.lhup.edu/~dsimanek/chapman.htm

"Is all the same, only different" -- HL
geoteo
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« Reply #256 on: March 13, 2012, 9:06:18 PM »

I have seen that--kind of like televised Darwin Awards.
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"Since the beginning of time, mankind has yearned for non-stick cookware."
mystictechgal
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One step at a time


« Reply #257 on: March 13, 2012, 9:25:28 PM »

I have seen that--kind of like televised Darwin Awards.

Yep. That was pretty much my impression of it.
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Quote
You must realize that a university cannot educate you. You must do that for yourself, although a college or university is the place where it is likely that you can study most efficiently.
http://www.lhup.edu/~dsimanek/chapman.htm

"Is all the same, only different" -- HL
golden_ticket
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« Reply #258 on: March 15, 2012, 4:19:17 PM »

"Some interests that I wish the [vocational interest inventory] would include through its scale measurements are gambling, procrastinating, and occupational fields such as gator wrestling or bull riding."
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biomancer
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CHE Fora Hazmat Team


« Reply #259 on: March 15, 2012, 6:57:49 PM »

"Some interests that I wish the [vocational interest inventory] would include through its scale measurements are gambling, procrastinating, and occupational fields such as gator wrestling or bull riding."

Our University tried to offer both an MA and a PhD in procrastinating, but they could never get around to doing the paperwork to propose the program.  It's probably just as well, since the truly talented students wouldn't get their applications in by the University's deadline anyway.
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Clueless people can be dangerous. The acidic environment they can spread often needs to be neutralized, and humor is basic.  - Dellaroux

I have realized that it is best to assume everyone is bonkers until they demonstrate otherwise. - ChaosByDesign
rowan1
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na na na na, na na na na , hey hey hey, goodbye


« Reply #260 on: March 16, 2012, 9:02:29 PM »

I have the new world record holder in run-on fragmented sentences.  Here is the winning entry, as it appeared:  FYI - there are more things wrong with this sentence than we can start to catalog.  The worst thing is that this class is a 500 level course and this is one of the many reasons I am fighting to get a "by permission of the instructor" or some kind of pre-req placed with it.

"A couple of characteristics that are always in Linney's plays are that he seems to have an insane (or borderline insane) persone in each play (Ada (from Child Byron) was insane from hallucinations from medicinal drugs, Buford (from F.M.) was insane from incest with his mother followed by her death) and a seemingly smart aleck person (Suzane from F.M., Byron from Child Byron, and Grant from A Lesson Before Dying).

Sadly, there was another sentence that was longer, but it was too painful to replicate, and not as completely fragmented.
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The time is out of joint—O cursèd spite,
That ever I was born to set it right!
professor_pat
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« Reply #261 on: March 17, 2012, 3:57:20 PM »

"The conditions of the concentration camp were not hospitable..."

Ya think?
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To me, forums are more of a relaxing period in which the poster can allow himself or himself to be lost in a sea of wonder.
rebelgirl
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"A hardened English teacher"--Disgruntled Student


« Reply #262 on: March 17, 2012, 6:06:55 PM »

"The conditions of the concentration camp were not hospitable..."

Ya think?

Your student clearly is a master of understatement.

Had to share this:  "On free range farms, manure is vitalized in a healthy way because animals are rotated from one pastor to another."

I'm visualizing all those poor pastors, being shat upon . . . but in a healthy way!

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I blame all of our problems on that frikkin' Timmy. Lassie should have left his lazy @$$ in the well.
nordyandtheglamazons
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« Reply #263 on: March 18, 2012, 12:45:27 AM »

Snippets from an in-class response to a feminist essay:

"Like all women, the author is a hypocrite. . . women should understand what men go through because of their wives . . . women say they want equality, but they don't understand the consequences."

And in response to the question, "What is the difference between paraphrasing and summarizing?" a student wrote:

"Summarizing is like a summary of the paper."
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mystictechgal
Happy in my "full, rich adulthood", and as a
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One step at a time


« Reply #264 on: March 18, 2012, 2:41:40 AM »

Snippets from an in-class response to a feminist essay:

"Like all women, the author is a hypocrite. . . women should understand what men go through because of their wives . . . women say they want equality, but they don't understand the consequences."

And in response to the question, "What is the difference between paraphrasing and summarizing?" a student wrote:

"Summarizing is like a summary of the paper."

That's deep.

(Thanks for the reminder. I still need to buy waders for the field-study class I'm taking that starts on Wednesday.)
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Quote
You must realize that a university cannot educate you. You must do that for yourself, although a college or university is the place where it is likely that you can study most efficiently.
http://www.lhup.edu/~dsimanek/chapman.htm

"Is all the same, only different" -- HL
geoteo
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« Reply #265 on: March 18, 2012, 10:16:11 AM »


"Summarizing is like a summary of the paper."

And paraphrasing is like a paraphrase of the paragraph.  And now that these points have been clarified  .  .  .  .
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"Since the beginning of time, mankind has yearned for non-stick cookware."
corny
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« Reply #266 on: March 25, 2012, 11:55:44 AM »

"Word spread like wildlife through the festival."

I'm imagining bears and deer, primarily.
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It may just be bourbon in the garden today, and making the best of things.
barred_owl
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« Reply #267 on: March 25, 2012, 12:30:39 PM »

"Word spread like wildlife through the festival."

I'm imagining bears and deer, primarily.

Squirrel!
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...I can't help rooting for the underdog underbird.
biomancer
trying to be the person my dog thinks I am
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CHE Fora Hazmat Team


« Reply #268 on: March 25, 2012, 1:32:55 PM »

"Word spread like wildlife through the festival."

I'm imagining bears and deer, primarily.

Squirrel!

<jumps up and looks out window>

<returns focus back to the forum>

What?
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Clueless people can be dangerous. The acidic environment they can spread often needs to be neutralized, and humor is basic.  - Dellaroux

I have realized that it is best to assume everyone is bonkers until they demonstrate otherwise. - ChaosByDesign
libwitch
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« Reply #269 on: March 26, 2012, 1:24:38 PM »

Oh, but I've heard several students say something on that order, as in "I'm not Christian, I'm a Catholic." I assume that "Christian" has become a synonym for "Evangelical" among the young.
[/quote]

My family is Polish Catholic, and I learned very quickly that if I described any of them - especially of my grand- generation "christian," that would earn me a slap.  In my family Christian= / = Catholic, although it was never explained to me why.

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