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Author Topic: Family planning question  (Read 3169 times)
purpledocstudent
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« on: May 01, 2012, 1:05:58 PM »

Caveat:  I know that ultimately I have to decide for myself but wanted to hear other thoughts on this.

I am ABD, most likely be done by December of this year. Husband and I have one child (almost 4) and husband has good job with good insurance/benefits.  We do still have his school loans from professional school, but otherwise financially stable (whatever that means nowadays).

We want to have child #2, I think it makes more sense to try now and have baby in the early spring (AFTER I defendóI donít imagine it taking longer than December to finish).  That way Iíll have a few months home with baby before starting a job in the fall (if Iím able to secure one).  If I get a job, both kids will go to daycare. 

The backup plan would be continue to take care of baby, have my older one go to preschool part time (so itís more affordable) until I find a job. 

The only situation I can see that will make it tough is that I am somewhat geographically limited to my area (because of hubbyís job).  I am willing though to compromise, non TT, adjunct, non-higher ed jobs to make whatever work.  I know that will go against me in trying to secure a TT later. But then again, if we didn't have baby #2, I would still be geographically limited.

Any thoughts about this being a good, bad or terrible idea?  I am in my mid-30ís if that helps.  Thank you. 
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macaroon
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« Reply #1 on: May 01, 2012, 1:08:48 PM »

I am in my mid-30ís if that helps.  Thank you. 


All the difference.  Start trying now because it might take a while.  Wait and it might be never. 
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hpopyfrood
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« Reply #2 on: May 01, 2012, 1:14:13 PM »

Bearing in mind that most of my family planning comes from the perspective of a lesbian couple for whom this has been a very expensive endeavor!

I'd say go for it for three main reasons:
1.  The age gap between your two children would be a nice one.
2.  Fertility starts to decline after 30 fairly quickly.
3.  I doubt having another kid would change much regarding finding a tenured job.  The geographical limits would probably be much more of an obstacle.

I certainly do not think this is a bad idea, and waiting to have the baby until after you defend seems quite smart.  (bearing in mind, you would have to deal with writing/defense while pregnant, which depending on your experience of pregnancy may be a bit of a burden...but probably less than a newborn!)


(We're in the process of trying for kid #2, without any permanent jobs, with my partner as a stay at home mom, with a 2 1/2 year old and a fair amount of debt and the added debt of IVF...so you're situation seems quite rosy!)
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larryc
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« Reply #3 on: May 01, 2012, 1:16:14 PM »

There is no non-disruptive time to have a baby. Get busy you two.
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reener06
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« Reply #4 on: May 01, 2012, 1:31:58 PM »

I had some similarities in when I finished and had #2. Be prepared for interviews when you are really pregnant--and can't travel or stand for long periods of time or far distances, so this could limit you (but you say the jobs you want would be nearby) and also have a plan for someone to watch baby so you can interview for 1-2 full days, if that happens. I left a 5 week old infant for a 2-day interview, and it was hard to pump enough milk to be gone just a few weeks after giving birth. Also, for phone interviews, you need someone to come tend baby so you can do it w/o much disruption.

My 2 cents.
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ideagirl
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« Reply #5 on: May 01, 2012, 1:36:44 PM »

There is no non-disruptive time to have a baby. Get busy you two.

That sums it up. If our parents had waited for the perfect time to have kids, none of us would exist.
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purpledocstudent
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« Reply #6 on: May 01, 2012, 1:53:55 PM »

Thanks everyone!
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