next »

[lab_gal]

I just found out that I am pregnant. This is unexpected but wonderful news - my first child was born through IVF, so we are pretty damn thrilled.

The complication is that I started my new job as a PI of my own lab last month. The great news is that I do not have any teaching obligations. The bad news is that I just found out that my institute has zero maternity leave - paid or unpaid. I do not qualify for FMLA because I started 4 weeks ago. My state does not offer short term disability. I will have accrued only 15 days of sick and vacation time by the time the baby is born. (And that's assuming I have a healthy pregnancy... my last one was high risk).

I am very fortunate that my husband is a newly minted stay at home dad. We do not have to worry about daycare, and I am so grateful for that. But, emotionally, I can't stomach leaving a 3 week old to put in face time for my new employer, especially when my employment metrics are long term (a certain percentage salary support in 3 years).

I am wondering if any other parents have been in the position of being an independent PI with no teaching obligations? Presumably I should have flexibility about leave because I am the boss of my own time, right? I'm imagining receiving a paycheck but choosing not to work in the office. Obviously I don't like the sound of that, but I'm not sure what other options I have. I'm thinking I could take one full month at home, and then be "back at work" but actually "working from home" for another month. I would plan to manage the lab from afar and work on manuscripts during that second month. I would come in to meet with my lab members during that second month if they need to see me.

Thoughts? Thanks in advance for your help.

[macaroon]

Labgal, your doctor will tell you that you are "disabled" for six weeks for a vaginal delivery and 8 weeks for a cesarian section.  Since you already have a kid, you know that you really aren't physically quite right for about that time frame.  Ask HR what happens if someone has surgery during their first year and needs six weeks off.  THAT'S what you need - not some sort of special half-ass leave because you're a woman and you're not entitled to be physically unwell. 

And, realistically, of course you'll be checking in with your people during your time off!  Jeepers, when I was a postdoc, I ended up on campus to pick up forms a week after I delivered, and I ended up fixing a machine for an hour while the baby napped.  Why not?

[lab_gal]

Labgal, your doctor will tell you that you are "disabled" for six weeks for a vaginal delivery and 8 weeks for a cesarian section.  Since you already have a kid, you know that you really aren't physically quite right for about that time frame.  Ask HR what happens if someone has surgery during their first year and needs six weeks off.  THAT'S what you need - not some sort of special half-ass leave because you're a woman and you're not entitled to be physically unwell. 

And, realistically, of course you'll be checking in with your people during your time off!  Jeepers, when I was a postdoc, I ended up on campus to pick up forms a week after I delivered, and I ended up fixing a machine for an hour while the baby napped.  Why not?

Thanks for the support! I was feeling pretty guilty and sheepish about trying to eek out some leave, but you're right, it's just not possible to be back so soon, emotionally or physically.

Are these kinds of things negotiable? I guess I feel burned because I already got f-ed for some stupid HR issue. My contract specified my start date, but it didn't fall on a Monday, and so they made my start date a Monday, and then I lost a full month of health insurance because of a particular policy about continuous days of employment and the start of benefits. It was total BS and everyone was on my side, but they simply "couldn't" do anything because it was the policy of their multi-state non-profit corporation (a hospital network!)

[larryc]

You need to go and speak to someone you can trust at your institution. Universities are generally pretty humane places, and there may be informal accommodations possible.

[lab_gal]

You need to go and speak to someone you can trust at your institution. Universities are generally pretty humane places, and there may be informal accommodations possible.

not a university : ( private research foundation in a hospital

I do have people who advocate for me, though. I suppose in this instance it's better not to delay telling them - maybe right at 12 weeks? I know I'm going to be obviously showing by then (small frame)

Not to go off on a (commonly heard) vent, but the US has its priorities totally freaking backwards. Family leave has definite health benefits for the child too

[docmama]

You need to go and speak to someone you can trust at your institution. Universities are generally pretty humane places, and there may be informal accommodations possible.

This exactly.  I am on a renewable contract and gave birth one month before I completed my first year of employment (so no FMLA).  Non-tenure track people at my institution do not accrue leave nor do they have maternity leave in their contract so my only option was to speak with my dean and see what could be done. The dean made arrangements for me to have zero on-campus obligations during what would have been my research quarter so I was able to stay home for three months with my daughter.

[lab_gal]

You need to go and speak to someone you can trust at your institution. Universities are generally pretty humane places, and there may be informal accommodations possible.

This exactly.  I am on a renewable contract and gave birth one month before I completed my first year of employment (so no FMLA).  Non-tenure track people at my institution do not accrue leave nor do they have maternity leave in their contract so my only option was to speak with my dean and see what could be done. The dean made arrangements for me to have zero on-campus obligations during what would have been my research quarter so I was able to stay home for three months with my daughter.

docmamma, that is good to hear you were able to get a decent arrangement. Were you doing the research yourself or did you also have students/etc? I have a 3 person lab, so I suspect I'm going to have to done some management from afar (I would love to hear otherwise... it is just tough for me to imagine totally dropping everything during that time, as I did when I gave birth during my postdoc)

[docmama]

I am a faculty member at a predominantly teaching school, so I don't have a lab and I do all of my research myself (qualitative, small-scale studies).  During my leave, I would check email once a day to respond to pressing matters and I brought my daughter with me to the couple of required on-campus meetings.  I was able to protect most of my off time and found that people were generally respectful of my time recovering/ enjoying my family.
My daughter started daycare two days/week the last month so I could get some writing completed, but that was my choice since that was my only dedicated research/writing time for the year. 

[macaroon]

I do have people who advocate for me, though. I suppose in this instance it's better not to delay telling them - maybe right at 12 weeks? I know I'm going to be obviously showing by then (small frame)

There's no need to jump the gun on telling anyone.  Remember, if someone gets into a car accident and needs six weeks off, or has a heart attack, that happens with no warning.  And you DESERVE the same accommodation that they would.  There's no rush.

And don't be too worried about showing.  I'm really small as well, and I waited until 15 weeks to tell anyone about my second child, and everyone was shocked.  Women who have already had babies do "show" earlier, but also, everyone expects you to have a bit of a pooch down there.  They don't notice that the pooch got hard rather than squishy.

[anon99]

First, congrats!!  Second, don't tell anyone until you are passed your first trimester.

Is your job mainly supervisory and can you work from home or do you need to do lab work (which will have its own set of problems during the pregnancy)?  Can you schedule things so you are doing admin type work around the time the baby is born and not starting new projects?  If hubby is a stay at home dad, how long is the commute?  Can you go home to nurse or can he bring baby in?

[menotti]

I've had two babies and technically never taken any leave.  Both were October babies; I worked until the delivery and then just didn't come back until January, when I started coming back for classes and meetings, and was more or less worked up to full time by the end of the semester. 

When I was on "leave" I stayed in touch by email but didn't really do any grant or manuscript writing.  I did have some supervising of small studies to do and just did it by email.  But in my discipline most of the fieldwork is done by RAs and the analysis can be done anywhere, so that, while not ideal, wasn't a big problem.  I also tried to get some proposals submitted right before I went on leave, so the gap in the pipeline wasn't too egregious.

[lab_gal]

Macaroon, I laughed out loud at your comment. Point well taken about inexplicable pooch being acceptable.

Anon99, thank you! It's a little of both (in-lab vs supervising). Since I am starting up my lab, it is to my advantage to perform experiments, but I just hired a very motivated research tech, so I think I can train her in anticipation of my being gone. I think I can get away without being in lab, but I do need to make sure that research is still getting done. Having just started the lab and lacking an established culture, this makes me nervous. The good news is that the due date lands right between grant cycles, so that could potentially reduce the gap. That's a good idea about my husband bringing in the baby to nurse. I think it will be tricky with our (will-be) 2 year old, but it could be done. Maybe a better plan would be for half days, with an additional hour or two of work in the afternoon (definitely not at night!)

Regarding lab work: last time I was pregnant, the entire purpose of my postdoc was to work with radioactivity. Thankfully, it worked out, other folks helped out, and there was no risk of exposure.

Menotti, thanks for sharing your story. That is very helpful to have as a reference...

[larryc]

Good luck.

[lab_gal]

Thanks, Larryc. I just realized I didn't reply specifically to your original post - I appreciate the advice.

So I'm actually out of the office sick today, and when I mentioned this today to the equivalent of my department secretary via email, he said to be sure to report it to the timekeeper. What?! I have to report that I'm taking time for one day?! This wouldn't be the case if I was at a University, would it? I mean, I get that I'm dealing with an HR that normally worries about such things, but that seems kind of ridiculous. And now I'm upset because I'm thinking that my plan to take unofficial time off won't work, if they care so much about keeping track of me.   : (

[macaroon]

And now I'm upset because I'm thinking that my plan to take unofficial time off won't work, if they care so much about keeping track of me.   : (

First of all, you have a PhD.  You are a rare creature.  Just because they CAN fire someone for unpaid leave doesn't mean they are obligated to do so.  You most likely WILL get unpaid leave.  It would take them way longer than 3 weeks to replace you.  They won't cut off their nose to spite their face.

You do know you aren't legally required to tell them about the pregnancy ever, right?  Have you seen Knocked Up?  Katherine Heigl never tells her boss or coworkers that she is pregnant.  Hilarious, but if you're getting weird vibes, you can just go into labor and have the doctor send in a note that you're disabled.  You don't have to say a thing.  It's kinda psycho, but keep it in the back of your mind that you truly do have that right.  It will help if you need to play hardball.  Oh, also?  Watch Knocked Up (again?) and laugh like crazy about Heigl's working conditions.

Regarding lab work: last time I was pregnant, the entire purpose of my postdoc was to work with radioactivity. Thankfully, it worked out, other folks helped out, and there was no risk of exposure.

Perhaps this is why nobody suspected I was pregnant.  And I lied.  I did tell someone I was pregnant before 15 weeks with kid #2.  The rad safety officer, who got me the fetal monitoring badge.  Since I was the rad safety officer for the lab, there was no need to even have it delivered on the sly.  I only worked with about 4 millicuries of isotope while pregnant, though - the fetus got ND exposure.