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merinoblue
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« Reply #180 on: January 07, 2012, 09:38:59 PM » |
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And no, I don't lick my plates and grunt while leaning over the sink.
<winces> Now, who said anything about grunting? |
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Sometimes I can start a party; sometimes I can't.
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oldadjunct
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« Reply #181 on: January 07, 2012, 09:51:57 PM » |
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And no, I don't lick my plates and grunt while leaning over the sink.
<winces> Now, who said anything about grunting? oooops. grins up apologetically. |
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Everyone is entitled to his own opinion, but not his own facts.
Daniel Patrick Moynihan
Fiction is baseball; Rhetoric is football.
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oldadjunct
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« Reply #182 on: January 07, 2012, 10:51:05 PM » |
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And no, I don't lick my plates and grunt while leaning over the sink.
<winces> Now, who said anything about grunting? oooops. grins up apologetically. Me at dinner http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4r7wHMg5Yjg&feature=youtube_gdata_player |
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Everyone is entitled to his own opinion, but not his own facts.
Daniel Patrick Moynihan
Fiction is baseball; Rhetoric is football.
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alto_stratus
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« Reply #183 on: January 08, 2012, 01:23:17 AM » |
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She's comparing apples to oranges: women who stay single vs. men who jump back into relationships. There are women who "jump back in" seeking the benefits of a relationship, and men who stay on their own for a long period of time because they prefer the benefits of being on their own. I think she's also attributing some behavior to gender which could be attributed to social vs. solitary types.
I think we all do our own cost vs. benefits analysis when figuring out whether to get back out there or not. There's good data, flawed data, and missing data involved in that process. Gender norms and personal experiences impact that analysis, too. As a result, I've seen men jump back into new relationships seeking a care-taker, a companion (or audience), and/or a financial contributor, perceiving a net benefit in being coupled again. I've seen women who experienced an unfavorable imbalance in responsibilities and sacrifices in their previous relationship(s) and perceived a greater benefit (financial, emotional, time, etc.) in being alone. But I've also seen women who jumped back into relationships for companionship or perceived safety/security, and men who are happy to live alone in their own little cozy nests, confidently cooking or ordering take-out, not worrying about getting sick.
Getting married just in case you might slip and fall one day? What if your spouse is traveling that week? That would be a serious bummer.
And then there's the story of Mariesa Weber, who lived with her parents and sister, who fell behind a bookcase and suffocated - her family didn't find her for two weeks.
You just never know.
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2clueless
How did I become a
Distinguished Senior Member
Posts: 1,003
In the classroom, with the red pen
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« Reply #184 on: January 08, 2012, 12:47:59 PM » |
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And no, I don't lick my plates and grunt while leaning over the sink.
<winces> Now, who said anything about grunting? oooops. grins up apologetically. It's UNFAIR to expect PlumPuppy to lean over the sink while licking her plate and grunting: she's too short! |
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Sometimes I can't sleep
I can't keep all these feelings at bay
I am rage, I am sorrow and grief
All alone in my way.
- Ferron, "Stand Up," Phantom Center
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alto_stratus
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« Reply #185 on: January 08, 2012, 03:53:04 PM » |
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At least she is making an effort to clean the dishes she uses.
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fiona
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« Reply #186 on: January 08, 2012, 08:45:44 PM » |
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Some of the readers of the article don't seem to distinguish between an academic study (which might have a quantitative cost-benefit analysis) and an op ed, which is a personal experience piece.
If you don't see value in personal experience, or in memoirs, maybe you've been an academic too long?
Ya need to get out there and read other things.
The Fiona
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The Fiona or perhaps La Fiona
Professor of Thread Killing, Fiork University
The Right Reverend Fiona, PhD, Bishop of the Fora
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alto_stratus
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« Reply #187 on: January 09, 2012, 12:46:29 PM » |
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She fell on her head and said, "I wish I had a man to help me," and then inexplicably projected her reasoning for this onto men. It's an interesting leap, but I don't see where it lands on a truism. I don't think she has thoroughly examined and processed her own situation. I found myself wondering, Was she trying to come up with a reason to date? Or was she trying to rationalize, or even diminish, her ex's new relationship? Just how much does she really know about the situations of her single female neighbors?
That said, I do appreciate the fact that the article was shared. Browning's perspective was certainly a new one to me.
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tinyzombie
She of the Ass-Kicking Socks, and a
Distinguished Senior Member
Posts: 7,439
elevate from this point on - chuck d
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« Reply #188 on: January 09, 2012, 12:58:29 PM » |
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Some of the readers of the article don't seem to distinguish between an academic study (which might have a quantitative cost-benefit analysis) and an op ed, which is a personal experience piece.
If you don't see value in personal experience, or in memoirs, maybe you've been an academic too long?
Ya need to get out there and read other things.
The Fiona
The problem is that her piece doesn't limit itself to personal experience, though. The number of gendered generalizations she made was awful. I have issues with the NYT, but this really made me question their acceptance/vetting policy. MB has already made this point better than I did. |
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Correct, as usual, TZ. That's because you are not Dude. TZ, however, is Dude. TZ is my favorite. I wish YOU began with A. |
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punchnpie
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« Reply #189 on: January 09, 2012, 02:59:25 PM » |
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And then there's the story of Mariesa Weber, who lived with her parents and sister, who fell behind a bookcase and suffocated - her family didn't find her for two weeks.
You just never know. Reminds me of a former co-worker's mom. Mom lived with hubby and co-worker's sister. Mom would exercise and then take a nap on the sofa; they knew this. One day sister and hubby come home from work, mom is stretched out on the couch. Nobody does anything until it's dinner time and mom hasn't gotten up. When they go to mom to wake her up to cook ('cause apparently they couldn't fend for themselves), mom was dead. So yeah, you never know. I'd forgotten that Punch jr slipped on the ice and hit his head, just missing what might have been a tragic slip and fall injury or death. Really. Did he wish he were married? No. He wished the grounds crew and done their friggin' job on the stairs. And he bought some yak trax to avoid the problem in the future. |
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What about all them other professors – ain’t they your kin? Good God, no. I loathe them and they loathe me. – Sunset Limited
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wilbrish
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« Reply #190 on: January 10, 2012, 06:44:46 PM » |
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The NYT piece was junk. I think she was trying to be cute to sell her book, or blog, or whatever it is she's selling. It says nothing and is hostile. Thanks, we don't need more bad writing.
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oldadjunct
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« Reply #191 on: January 10, 2012, 07:38:43 PM » |
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The problem is that her piece doesn't limit itself to personal experience, though. The number of gendered generalizations she made was awful. I have issues with the NYT, but this really made me question their acceptance/vetting policy.
Yep. I learned to say "Yep" when I was in the Cub Scouts. I am a guy. Women say +1, because they were never in the Cub Scouts, but they respond to wedding invitations so women developed the habit of saying +1. This is a memoir, so it's not dumb. |
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Everyone is entitled to his own opinion, but not his own facts.
Daniel Patrick Moynihan
Fiction is baseball; Rhetoric is football.
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merinoblue
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« Reply #192 on: January 10, 2012, 07:45:31 PM » |
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The NYT piece was junk. I think she was trying to be cute to sell her book, or blog, or whatever it is she's selling. It says nothing and is hostile. Thanks, we don't need more bad writing.
She has some attractive photos on her blog. |
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Sometimes I can start a party; sometimes I can't.
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2clueless
How did I become a
Distinguished Senior Member
Posts: 1,003
In the classroom, with the red pen
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« Reply #193 on: January 10, 2012, 08:16:08 PM » |
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The problem is that her piece doesn't limit itself to personal experience, though. The number of gendered generalizations she made was awful. I have issues with the NYT, but this really made me question their acceptance/vetting policy.
Yep. I learned to say "Yep" when I was in the Cub Scouts. I am a guy. Women say +1, because they were never in the Cub Scouts, but they respond to wedding invitations so women developed the habit of saying +1. Huh, I never thought of the fora as a wedding invitation before. |
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Sometimes I can't sleep
I can't keep all these feelings at bay
I am rage, I am sorrow and grief
All alone in my way.
- Ferron, "Stand Up," Phantom Center
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