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[bartislartfast]

I hesitate to jump into the middle of a thread for my first post, but since this thread seems to be resurrected from time-to-time, perhaps I may be able to help some people feel a bit better about being in this situation.

I graduated with my doctorate this past year, and conducted a pre-graduation job search.  As chance had it, there was a position open at a small regional engineering school.  After submitting my application materials, I sent my sister -- an Associate Prof. in a cousin field, so to speak -- a heads-up note to ask if she'd keep her ear to the ground about the job just to let me know anything she heard.

I found out that, due to the size of the department, they had enlisted some professors from other departments to assist with their search -- including my sister.

I didn't get the job.  Not even on the long short-list (to borrow from several other threads' terminology).  I did get a nice note from the SCC about the rejection, but never really talked about it with my sister.  It would've just made an uncomfortable situation even more awkward -- more for her than for me, I imagine.

This is all to say that if acquaintances or friends wind up on separate ends of the search committee, it could be far, far worse.

[xckrx]

Ugh, I think the OP dodged a bullet! That does not sound like a genuine "friend" at all. If I stopped talking to every friend of mine who was at a department that declined to hire me, it would get very lonely around here... lol

Edited to add that I see this is an old thread. Still a relevant one, though, especially as this is a time of the year when lots of folks are getting or giving bad news.

[fedscholar]

Maybe it is just me, but I would have been pesky in another way. I would have wanted to know all the scuttlebutt on the selection, what the average qualifications of the candidates were, who rose high, who was otherwise qualified but a turnoff,etc.,etc. 

It is all very cloak and dagger to me at this point.

[gbrown]

This isn't nearly as serious, but I have a friend who published a good mainstream writing textbook. I proposed it at my college; it lost out to another text. I'm not sure how much my friend would have made, but she e-mailed me about the "progress" and I had to tell her that my college did not choose her book.

Fortunately she was kind about it and we remain friends. But I could see how it could have gone the other way...

In this case, I was able to share that I championed her book so I could see how it softened the blow.