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[drweevil]

My SO was hired the fall I took my comps (different university). He's tenured now and very involved in a lot of the University's pet projects--one of the 12hr day workaholics.  I've finished my PhD, received a really nice postdoc for this year, but I am on the market and looking at having to move if I am fortunate to receive any sort of offer. When my SO was hired there was no mention of any accommodation for me as I was not yet ABD and I got the feeling that his peers at the time weren't interested in having another female in the department (gasp! they already had one!). I've adjuncted for the university and I have a very strong cv. There have been others (not in the department, but in Arts & Sciences) who have had an offer extended to their SO. It's been almost six years, is it too late to ask? My SO seems to think so.   

[larryc]

No it is not too late at all.

[flyingbuttress]

It's definitely not too late. I have seen two situations in my own department that worked out like this, years after the fact. Your SO is more valuable to the department now that he has tenure. He may need to make noise about going on the job market or actually get another offer to get things moving, though.

[larryc]

You should use a two-prong strategy. The first part is to make the institution and department familiar and comfortable with you. Adjunct a class or two, give a guest lecture, etc. Second, your husband needs to begin to make it clear that the two of you are looking for a way for both of you to have careers--there or elsewhere. He needs to be willing to go on the market with you.

[drweevil]

Those are great points, but I'm worried that because my spouse has been so nonchalant he's probably missed a dozen chances to work me in or at least let it be known that I'm interested. Granted it's not my first choice for a university, but we've built a life in this town and otherwise if I get a real offer, I'm going to have to follow it. I don't think he's going to go unless it's into a tenured position if I get an accommodation. We've been together nearly nine years (no children, none wanted) and we've always put our academic pursuits at the forefront even if it meant living apart. We've leaved separately at various times through internships and fellowships, but I'm worried now that I'm really on the market for a permanent gig he's not going to be willing to stick his neck out for me if it means causing a slight ripple in his department. Our relationship is good, but I've suddenly realized how very compartmentalized it is in this respect.     

And while I have been adjuncting regularly for about four years there and I know lots of people, if he's made it clear that he's not going anywhere and ok with me teaching at Farfaraway University, there's not much incentive to give me anything...

Good grief, all written out like that it really looks bleak.

[ideagirl]

Those are great points, but I'm worried that because my spouse has been so nonchalant he's probably missed a dozen chances to work me in or at least let it be known that I'm interested.

So? That's water under the bridge. What's the point of worrying about past events? Just do what you can, starting now. Including having a talk with spouse about finding opportunities to work you in.

I'm worried now that I'm really on the market for a permanent gig he's not going to be willing to stick his neck out for me if it means causing a slight ripple in his department. Our relationship is good, but I've suddenly realized how very compartmentalized it is in this respect.     

And while I have been adjuncting regularly for about four years there and I know lots of people, if he's made it clear that he's not going anywhere and ok with me teaching at Farfaraway University, there's not much incentive to give me anything...

Good grief, all written out like that it really looks bleak.

Maybe it is all bleak. Maybe it's not. Are you concerned about broaching the subject and thus finding out for sure whether he's really that way or not?

[crowie]

It sounds like the relationship is the issue, rather than your SO's institution.  You guys need to talk about what each of you is willing or not willing to do to get jobs that satisfy both of you, in the same place.

[bluezebracat]

If you don't ask, you won't ever know, right?

[larryc]

Hubby needs a talking to.