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[jessidev]

My name is  Jessi , i have twins sons, and both are 3.5 years old. I have an issue with today’s educational environment. I am a Christian and isn’t any place here where I can be relaxed about my child’s religious values, the sacred thoughts will remain same as I gave him?

[systeme_d_]

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.

You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you. For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

- Kahlil Gibran, a Maronite Christian

[polly_mer]

My name is  Jessi , i have twins sons, and both are 3.5 years old. I have an issue with today’s educational environment. I am a Christian and isn’t any place here where I can be relaxed about my child’s religious values, the sacred thoughts will remain same as I gave him?

Short answer: no.  The concise summary of Systeme_D's quotation is that our children are their own people and we have less control over their thoughts than most people wish to admit.

"Today's educational environment" is a meaningless construct since there are huge variations in educational environments available to Americans.  Some charter schools have religious missions and will welcome people who share those values.  Many parochial schools exist to have religious instruction and support of Christian values as part of the academic endeavor.  Even many public schools in some areas are very much in line with religious values and sacred thoughts because that's what the community has so it is reflected in their schools.

For people who are in your position, you can select the educational environment that will be in accord with your values and sacred thoughts if you shop around.  That will not assure that your children will stay on the path that you set them, but it is your best shot.

[collegekidsmom]

I notice that many Christians who homeschool their children and don't let them mix too much with other people seem to be able to have more control. Note the Duggars who seem to have raised teenagers who all believe the same thing. That is astonishing to me-to see teenagers who all toe the line. SOOO interesting.

One of my children went to an excellent Catholic school, considers that he had an excellent education there and was always a staunch atheist. However, we were looking for grammar and usage, and things like that.

Enjoy your kids and let their minds develop along the lines of their own interests and thoughts. They are their own people even though they are your kids.
I am so curious. How can you "give your kids thoughts?" Sounds like some interesting mind control experiment. Besides you will find out that if you tell your kid, "Do not do that!" they are likely to enjoy even more doing just that forbidden thing. That's the way it is with kids. I hope you can enjoy your children and not worry so much about their thoughts. Otherwise, it is likely to be very stressful.

[bluezebracat]

Troll.

[stitch]

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.

You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you. For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

- Kahlil Gibran, a Maronite Christian

An all female a cappella group recorded a song with that poem as the lyrics.  Beautiful. 


Actually, interesting bit of trivia.  The husband of one of the a cappella group members is now a US Congressman.  Can anyone identify the singing group with just that information?

[smokeythebear]

One of my children went to an excellent Catholic school, considers that he had an excellent education there and was always a staunch atheist. However, we were looking for grammar and usage, and things like that.

I went to a Catholic school, while being raised a staunch agnostic and remain an atheist, I know I benefited greatly from the religious education. It contributed greatly to my humanist ideals, and provided me with the perspective of many excellent and terrible examples of people of faith. But, I should point out to the OP, that there's a consensus amongst all of the people I know that have come through the parochial school system is that nothing creates heretics, doubters, Christmas/Easter attenders only, or atheists faster than 5, 10 years of that type of constant religious presence in their lives, YMMV.

[post_functional]

Troll.

We should play Troll, Spam or Sock.  It's sort of like Rock, Scissors, Paper.

I say Spam.

[dellaroux]

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.

You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you. For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

- Kahlil Gibran, a Maronite Christian

An all female a cappella group recorded a song with that poem as the lyrics.  Beautiful. 


Actually, interesting bit of trivia.  The husband of one of the a cappella group members is now a US Congressman.  Can anyone identify the singing group with just that information?

Sweet Honey in the Rock.

But I'm not sure which one is a congressmember's wife; the group's members have changed a lot over the years (heard them in their first or second season quite awhile ago; more recently a couple of years ago--still great!)

[dellaroux]

And, to reply after the next frame came in:

Liberal tolerance needs to extend to those who may have very conservative, even intolerant views, you know...or else serious questions of hypocrisy have to be addressed.

Just because you don't see the situation the same way doesn't mean something is spammy, trollish, or whatever.

I take the question as serious, and I hear it a lot.

Also, three of my former dance students were home-schooled; two have graduated from R1s and one is teaching in the inner city using techniques their shared mom's group developed.

It's actually possible for children to have a good education and to have religious values that differ significantly from any local norm you might identify, in any direction, left, right, or center, of the continuum.

I'd say that either home schooling or some form of parochial or private, religiously-identified school could work well.

The main issue with home-schooling is that it's a lot of work for the family, if done well. If it's not, the child's basic backgrounding suffers.

The difficulty with private schools run to expense and some differences of theological background that are likely to arise in any case (but will be, in the better schools, discussed without forcing children to "sign on a dotted line" to a given bit of doctrine or dogma without understanding it.)

There are networks of home-schooled and privately-schooled families if you google for them; I know of a few in my own area and their headmasters could put you in touch with others in your own area, probably.

PM me if you like.

[stitch]

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.

You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you. For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

- Kahlil Gibran, a Maronite Christian

An all female a cappella group recorded a song with that poem as the lyrics.  Beautiful. 


Actually, interesting bit of trivia.  The husband of one of the a cappella group members is now a US Congressman.  Can anyone identify the singing group with just that information?

Sweet Honey in the Rock.

But I'm not sure which one is a congressmember's wife; the group's members have changed a lot over the years (heard them in their first or second season quite awhile ago; more recently a couple of years ago--still great!)

Nope.  Not nearly so well known.  Actually, the groups in which the congressmember and his wife preformed together were slightly better known.  At least among parents.

[dellaroux]

Hmm, OK, well Sweet Honey does have a song, "On Children," based on the Gibran poem, in any case--thanks for the excuse to listen to them for a bit!

   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HCVvoL_F5gA&feature=related

"You cannot make them just like you..."

and

"they belong not to you..."

Many parents, in many different ways, do need to heed this reminder, and at the same time, want to give their best to their children.

Balancing what the "best" may be is the hardest part, and requires getting to know the child for who they are, themselves, as well.

[stitch]

The one I'm thinking of may well be a cover of the SHotR version.

Anyway:

This is the group - Femme M'Amie  - Photo  (Peggo Horstmann Hodes is in the center)

And this is the slightly better known group Pegasus featuring Congressman Paul Hodes backing up his wife.


And just for giggles, here's Peggo & Paul preforming together on the campaign trail recently.

Not quite Clinton with his sax, but still a fun piece of useless trivia.

[post_functional]

And, to reply after the next frame came in:

Liberal tolerance needs to extend to those who may have very conservative, even intolerant views, you know...or else serious questions of hypocrisy have to be addressed.

Liberal tolerance and healthy skepticism are not mutually exclusive.

Assuming the post is in earnest, why would the OP find this particular forum to post this particular question?  This is a question for the mothering dot commune, not here.  This is a forum about higher education; are we to believe the poster is simply working out her concerns a duly diligent twelve to fourteen years in advance?  Come on. 

[voxprincipalis]

OP has posted the same question all over the interwebz, and either has followed it up herself or has had it answered by people advocating a certain website for Christian schools.

It is half a spam setup.

VP