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[thenewyorker]

Wait - Dr.Pud, am I correct in assuming that you and the little one would be living there apart from your husband for a while?  You can definitely do a 1BR without the dividing wall and you'll be just fine.  It would be socially acceptable there, too.

Almost required!
I really, really suggest Greenpoint/Williamsburg. There is sooooo much kid stuff going on that its amazing and the prices (and snottiness) is lower than in Park Slope. But there are parts of B'burg that you really want to stay away from.. And you will get more bang for your buck in Greenpoint (and for those naysayers...the G has been better lately and she can always walk or bike through McCarren park to the Bedford L).

If you want to meet up when you are here for your interview, PM me...you got the address!

[newfac2007]

On the subway question, Washington Heights and Inwood are mad connected.  Red AND blue lines.

To be fair, though, the crack epidemic hit a lot of places really hard in the late 80s and early 90s.  By the time I moved in, the homicide rate had dropped substantially.  

Now that's a New Yorker.  : )

Hey, the midwest has always sucked, meth or not (I know, here's where people pile on me about making comments re: Flyover country).  

I like NYC a lot, but I'll never be able to afford to live there because I need at 3bdr, 2ba house (at least) and you don't get those in NYC for less than a few million.  

Plus, it gets damn cold.

And you know what I love about the midwest? We don't feel the need to say nasty things about other people just to make ourselves seem superior. The people on the east coast are just as racist, just as close minded and no more progressive than anywhere else in this country; you're no better. You just feel the need to be rude about it on top of it. I don't know what's going on but I have recently run into so many east coasters with this superiority complex that it's seriously making me reconsider a move there.

[scampster]

On the subway question, Washington Heights and Inwood are mad connected.  Red AND blue lines.

To be fair, though, the crack epidemic hit a lot of places really hard in the late 80s and early 90s.  By the time I moved in, the homicide rate had dropped substantially.  

Now that's a New Yorker.  : )

Hey, the midwest has always sucked, meth or not (I know, here's where people pile on me about making comments re: Flyover country).  

I like NYC a lot, but I'll never be able to afford to live there because I need at 3bdr, 2ba house (at least) and you don't get those in NYC for less than a few million.  

Plus, it gets damn cold.

And you know what I love about the midwest? We don't feel the need to say nasty things about other people just to make ourselves seem superior. The people on the east coast are just as racist, just as close minded and no more progressive than anywhere else in this country; you're no better. You just feel the need to be rude about it on top of it. I don't know what's going on but I have recently run into so many east coasters with this superiority complex that it's seriously making me reconsider a move there.

I lived in the midwest for 7 years and I can tell you that east coasters do not have a monopoly on superiority complexes.

[spyzowin]

On the subway question, Washington Heights and Inwood are mad connected.  Red AND blue lines.

To be fair, though, the crack epidemic hit a lot of places really hard in the late 80s and early 90s.  By the time I moved in, the homicide rate had dropped substantially.  

Now that's a New Yorker.  : )

Hey, the midwest has always sucked, meth or not (I know, here's where people pile on me about making comments re: Flyover country).  

I like NYC a lot, but I'll never be able to afford to live there because I need at 3bdr, 2ba house (at least) and you don't get those in NYC for less than a few million.  

Plus, it gets damn cold.

And you know what I love about the midwest? We don't feel the need to say nasty things about other people just to make ourselves seem superior. The people on the east coast are just as racist, just as close minded and no more progressive than anywhere else in this country; you're no better. You just feel the need to be rude about it on top of it. I don't know what's going on but I have recently run into so many east coasters with this superiority complex that it's seriously making me reconsider a move there.

I lived in the midwest for 2 years, and it really did suck. There was no culture. No decent restaurants. Terrible weather. Too much religion. Everyone was out of shape and did nothing but slurp back over sized Sonic sodas. It was horrible. I'd rather die than ever set foot in KS again.

PS I've been approached by the Klan twice in my life. Both times in KS.

[janedoh]

And you know what I love about the midwest? We don't feel the need to say nasty things about other people just to make ourselves seem superior. The people on the east coast are just as racist, just as close minded and no more progressive than anywhere else in this country; you're no better. You just feel the need to be rude about it on top of it. I don't know what's going on but I have recently run into so many east coasters with this superiority complex that it's seriously making me reconsider a move there.

I have to disagree here. Maybe this is the case if you are white, heterosexual, and Christian, but this is absolutely not my experience of the Midwest. Alas, we have family there, so we have to go back every year or so.

As a Jewish person, I have been mocked, insulted, and a target for conversion. I have heard horrifying things about gay people--things I absolutely don't want my kids to hear about their beloved aunts. Ditto for racist and xenophobic remarks.

East Coast people can be obnoxious and have superiority complexes just like anyone else, but the population is not so homogeneous, so it is easier to find your crowd.

And I vastly prefer the "rudeness" (not saying hello to everyone, speaking bluntly) of the East Coast to the fake friendliness of the Midwest. At least you know where you stand, and it is easy to see through the fakery when you've been there a while.

[scampster]

On the subway question, Washington Heights and Inwood are mad connected.  Red AND blue lines.

To be fair, though, the crack epidemic hit a lot of places really hard in the late 80s and early 90s.  By the time I moved in, the homicide rate had dropped substantially.  

Now that's a New Yorker.  : )

Hey, the midwest has always sucked, meth or not (I know, here's where people pile on me about making comments re: Flyover country).  

I like NYC a lot, but I'll never be able to afford to live there because I need at 3bdr, 2ba house (at least) and you don't get those in NYC for less than a few million.  

Plus, it gets damn cold.

And you know what I love about the midwest? We don't feel the need to say nasty things about other people just to make ourselves seem superior. The people on the east coast are just as racist, just as close minded and no more progressive than anywhere else in this country; you're no better. You just feel the need to be rude about it on top of it. I don't know what's going on but I have recently run into so many east coasters with this superiority complex that it's seriously making me reconsider a move there.

I lived in the midwest for 2 years, and it really did suck. There was no culture. No decent restaurants. Terrible weather. Too much religion. Everyone was out of shape and did nothing but slurp back over sized Sonic sodas. It was horrible. I'd rather die than ever set foot in KS again.

PS I've been approached by the Klan twice in my life. Both times in KS.

I can't speak for where you lived, but I call bulls*** on extrapolating this to the entire midwest. For one thing, the midwest includes Chicago and Minneapolis and they have culture and good restaurants. And I'd take the snow and cold over the swelter of Florida or any day. I also began participating in endurance athletics while living in the midwest, as there were supportive communities of athletes already in place.

My complaints about the Midwest stem more from this:

And I vastly prefer the "rudeness" (not saying hello to everyone, speaking bluntly) of the East Coast to the fake friendliness of the Midwest. At least you know where you stand, and it is easy to see through the fakery when you've been there a while.

Because not only it is true, many midwesterners fancy themselves superior because they are fakey friendly to everyone. Hence my statement about superiority complexes not being limited to coastal people.

[macaroon]

And you know what I love about the midwest? We don't feel the need to say nasty things about other people just to make ourselves seem superior. The people on the east coast are just as racist, just as close minded and no more progressive than anywhere else in this country; you're no better. You just feel the need to be rude about it on top of it. I don't know what's going on but I have recently run into so many east coasters with this superiority complex that it's seriously making me reconsider a move there.

I have to disagree here. Maybe this is the case if you are white, heterosexual, and Christian, but this is absolutely not my experience of the Midwest. Alas, we have family there, so we have to go back every year or so.

I've spent about half of my life in the metro NY area and half in the midwest, and I agree with janedoh here.  For this reason, I personally think Manhattan is a better place to raise a family than the midwest.  I went to college in the midwest and was horrified that the Asian girl in my circle of friends was nicknamed "Eggroll".  I was even more horrified that she didn't find the nickname objectionable.  

Twenty years ago, I might have leaned towards the midwest due to "safety", but now that meth is so popular, flyover country has lost that advantage.  I would have accepted a tenure track position in the midwest, though, happily and never looked back.  

[prytania3]

In Washington Heights, folks used to say hi on the street, but that was the Dominican flavor. Now that it's getting so white there, they probably don't anymore.

[history_grrrl]

In Washington Heights, folks used to say hi on the street, but that was the Dominican flavor. Now that it's getting so white there, they probably don't anymore.

Oh, Pry, you make me homesick for Inwood! Best cafe con leche on the planet (outside of the DR). Fabulous park to hike in, with views of the Hudson and the Palisades. Wonderful butcher shops that carry homemade lasagna, bread from Arthur Avenue, and delicious rice pudding brought in from Hunt's Point Market. The Irish pub with the excellent burgers. The little library branch. That marina on the Hudson that mght be gone now. Families chatting in Spanish while sitting in chairs placed on the sidewalk in front of their buildings. Kids playing everywhere. Old white ethnc men still wearing those '40s hats, perched on benches on Broadway watching the action.

I love where I am, but man, there's something about NYC . . .

[prytania3]

In Washington Heights, folks used to say hi on the street, but that was the Dominican flavor. Now that it's getting so white there, they probably don't anymore.

Oh, Pry, you make me homesick for Inwood! Best cafe con leche on the planet (outside of the DR). Fabulous park to hike in, with views of the Hudson and the Palisades. Wonderful butcher shops that carry homemade lasagna, bread from Arthur Avenue, and delicious rice pudding brought in from Hunt's Point Market. The Irish pub with the excellent burgers. The little library branch. That marina on the Hudson that mght be gone now. Families chatting in Spanish while sitting in chairs placed on the sidewalk in front of their buildings. Kids playing everywhere. Old white ethnc men still wearing those '40s hats, perched on benches on Broadway watching the action.

I love where I am, but man, there's something about NYC . . .

Hehehe/ You aren't talking about the Liffy Bar, are you? I took Hedgepig there and he loved it. All these old Irish guys--and young ones, too. We were drinking with two of New York's finest. That would *never* happen in CT.

But I tell you-not a day goes by that I don't have sorrowful regrets about selling my place in the Heights. My life just started going downhill from that point.

[paulsa]

And you know what I love about the midwest? We don't feel the need to say nasty things about other people just to make ourselves seem superior. The people on the east coast are just as racist, just as close minded and no more progressive than anywhere else in this country; you're no better. You just feel the need to be rude about it on top of it. I don't know what's going on but I have recently run into so many east coasters with this superiority complex that it's seriously making me reconsider a move there.

I have to disagree here. Maybe this is the case if you are white, heterosexual, and Christian, but this is absolutely not my experience of the Midwest. Alas, we have family there, so we have to go back every year or so.

As a Jewish person, I have been mocked, insulted, and a target for conversion. I have heard horrifying things about gay people--things I absolutely don't want my kids to hear about their beloved aunts. Ditto for racist and xenophobic remarks.

East Coast people can be obnoxious and have superiority complexes just like anyone else, but the population is not so homogeneous, so it is easier to find your crowd.

And I vastly prefer the "rudeness" (not saying hello to everyone, speaking bluntly) of the East Coast to the fake friendliness of the Midwest. At least you know where you stand, and it is easy to see through the fakery when you've been there a while.

I lived in NYC for years, and if you don't hear racist and xenophobic remarks and slurs against gay people there, it's probably because of who you're choosing to spend your time around; when you visit your family in the midwest, you're probably not choosing who you mix with to the same extent and aren't insulated anymore from the same types who talk the same way all the time in NYC. Most people coexist fairly happily in NYC, but the idea that it's devoid of racial tensions, and even racial violence, or devoid of a large number of people who are vocal about their homophobia, is just flat out wrong.

[janedoh]

And you know what I love about the midwest? We don't feel the need to say nasty things about other people just to make ourselves seem superior. The people on the east coast are just as racist, just as close minded and no more progressive than anywhere else in this country; you're no better. You just feel the need to be rude about it on top of it. I don't know what's going on but I have recently run into so many east coasters with this superiority complex that it's seriously making me reconsider a move there.

I have to disagree here. Maybe this is the case if you are white, heterosexual, and Christian, but this is absolutely not my experience of the Midwest. Alas, we have family there, so we have to go back every year or so.

As a Jewish person, I have been mocked, insulted, and a target for conversion. I have heard horrifying things about gay people--things I absolutely don't want my kids to hear about their beloved aunts. Ditto for racist and xenophobic remarks.

East Coast people can be obnoxious and have superiority complexes just like anyone else, but the population is not so homogeneous, so it is easier to find your crowd.

And I vastly prefer the "rudeness" (not saying hello to everyone, speaking bluntly) of the East Coast to the fake friendliness of the Midwest. At least you know where you stand, and it is easy to see through the fakery when you've been there a while.

I lived in NYC for years, and if you don't hear racist and xenophobic remarks and slurs against gay people there, it's probably because of who you're choosing to spend your time around; when you visit your family in the midwest, you're probably not choosing who you mix with to the same extent and aren't insulated anymore from the same types who talk the same way all the time in NYC. Most people coexist fairly happily in NYC, but the idea that it's devoid of racial tensions, and even racial violence, or devoid of a large number of people who are vocal about their homophobia, is just flat out wrong.

I totally agree with you that there are xenophobic, racist, homophobic people in NYC. I never said it was a post-racial utopia. Just that I didn't find "We don't feel the need to say nasty things about other people just to make ourselves seem superior." to be true about the Midwest.

I also said that it is just a lot easier to avoid racist/sexist/homophobic/xenophobic people because there are so many more people there and the people that are there are more diverse. I imagine the same is true for Chicago or Minneapolis/St. Paul. In large and diverse population centers, it is much easier to find people who share your values.

[prytania3]

Yes, a comparison of NYC's Manhattan to Manhattan, KS is not apples to apples.

[paulsa]

And you know what I love about the midwest? We don't feel the need to say nasty things about other people just to make ourselves seem superior. The people on the east coast are just as racist, just as close minded and no more progressive than anywhere else in this country; you're no better. You just feel the need to be rude about it on top of it. I don't know what's going on but I have recently run into so many east coasters with this superiority complex that it's seriously making me reconsider a move there.

I have to disagree here. Maybe this is the case if you are white, heterosexual, and Christian, but this is absolutely not my experience of the Midwest. Alas, we have family there, so we have to go back every year or so.

As a Jewish person, I have been mocked, insulted, and a target for conversion. I have heard horrifying things about gay people--things I absolutely don't want my kids to hear about their beloved aunts. Ditto for racist and xenophobic remarks.

East Coast people can be obnoxious and have superiority complexes just like anyone else, but the population is not so homogeneous, so it is easier to find your crowd.

And I vastly prefer the "rudeness" (not saying hello to everyone, speaking bluntly) of the East Coast to the fake friendliness of the Midwest. At least you know where you stand, and it is easy to see through the fakery when you've been there a while.

I lived in NYC for years, and if you don't hear racist and xenophobic remarks and slurs against gay people there, it's probably because of who you're choosing to spend your time around; when you visit your family in the midwest, you're probably not choosing who you mix with to the same extent and aren't insulated anymore from the same types who talk the same way all the time in NYC. Most people coexist fairly happily in NYC, but the idea that it's devoid of racial tensions, and even racial violence, or devoid of a large number of people who are vocal about their homophobia, is just flat out wrong.

I totally agree with you that there are xenophobic, racist, homophobic people in NYC. I never said it was a post-racial utopia. Just that I didn't find "We don't feel the need to say nasty things about other people just to make ourselves seem superior." to be true about the Midwest.

I also said that it is just a lot easier to avoid racist/sexist/homophobic/xenophobic people because there are so many more people there and the people that are there are more diverse. I imagine the same is true for Chicago or Minneapolis/St. Paul. In large and diverse population centers, it is much easier to find people who share your values.

What I liked so much about NYC was that as someone who is basically from small-town middle America, I was constantly exposed to (and reveled in) this diversity—all of the little ethnic communities, literal communities that had taken over several city blocks and where you’d be as likely to hear Spanish, Chinese, etc. as English. The world’s cuisine, music, culture literally at your fingertips.  I’m still a bit defensive about middle America, though, because the insularity, while real, can be somewhat exaggerated and rooted in stereotypes about bible-thumping hicks who are full of hate and ignorant about the rest of the world, which is hardly the whole story. Yes, because of its huge and diverse population, NYC affords people an easier time of finding like-minded communities, but at times that’s simply an opportunity to enact the same dynamic  of insularity and clinging-together (it’s “us” against “them”) that small-town America falls into by default. I guess all I’m saying is that human nature is what it is, and that it’s not determined by geography. You will find plenty of gays and members of ethnic minorities who have been embraced by their neighbors and are quite happy in small towns or even rural places all over the country.  There are definitely places where gays, Jews, etc would and do encounter problems—some of them are small American towns, and some of them are certain neighborhoods in metropolitan area.

[eddyman]

New York was a wonderful place to live and I didn't mind the fact that people weren't automatically friendly (and living abroad I've lived in places where people are far less friendly).  One thing that bothered me though was the fact that when you met someone new they were always seemed to be measuring you up and/or puffing themselves up in your presence.  This seemed mostly to be a male practice and was nearly always done by someone who wasn't from NYC proper originally (which was most of the young people).  There was a feeing that people judged you more on what you did than your character.  I've found this sizing up to be much less of an issue in the Midwest or other areas of the country.