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[bms2000]

I rank watching students take tests right up there with watching grass grow on the excitement meter. So over the years, I have come up with a number of ways of keeping myself awake while they test.

1) The ongoing Hat Experiment

I am convinced that there is an exponential function between time in the term and the number of hats on students. If you look at the percentage of students wearing hats to the first test, it is usually around 10-15%. By the final, it's usually much higher - I've seen up to 75% hat coverage. I am convinced it is a function of not enough time to shower and possible answer sheet hiding. But every test I gather data on this. Why? I'm wicked bored.

2) The average name game

I make a list of all the students first names. I assign the first letter of their names a number (A=1, B = 2, etc.). I then average the numbers to get the average first letter. I then do the same thing with the number of letters in each first name. This way, I can come up with an average name for the class. I usually choose an average female name and an average male name. Often, the average male name is Michael. Not sure why, but it is.

So, what do other folks do if they have nothing productive to do during testing?

[atalanta]

Re: the Hat experiment.

I think you might be measuring the diffusion time scale for a particular piece of information: that cheat notes can be secreted inside headwear. Some universities prohibit hat-wearing (more specifically, baseball caps) during exams for this reason.

[onion]

I used to try to read or do my own work, but I've noticed in the last year or two that cheating has gotten much, much worse.  So when I'm not strolling the aisles, standing behind people I've seen cheating on quizzes, and kicking notebooks and bags further under desks, I sit on the front table with my arms crossed over my chest, glaring menacingly at the students.

Unfortunately, my behavior seems to really freak out the conscientious, prone-to-nervous-attack students and does nothing for the hat-wearing cheaters.  (My quiz cheaters are all baseball cap wearers, so I make them take off their hats and put them under their desks for assessment now.)

[atalanta]

But now, to answer your question: What do I do during exams? This varies a lot, depending on how many students there are (anywhere from 4 to 200), whether I have coerced any TA's to help proctor, and whether I have unintentionally included an ambiguously-phrased question on the exam. In any case, I can never seem to focus for more than a minute or two, so I rarely accomplish useful work.  And what I do during exams is not nearly as entertaining as what you do...

1. Read a magazine.
2. Read and post to chronicle fora (... may I assume that you are proctoring an exam at this very moment, hence this post?)
3. Go to the back of the classroom where no one can see me and write out the exam solutions.
4. Take an attendance sheet around the room and then check student id's individually.
5. I ALWAYS count the students taking the exam and make sure it matches the number of exams I collect in the end.
6. Try to memorize the names of all the students I don't know
7. Sprint from one end of the classroom to the other, responding to questions and saying things like, "No, really, you do NOT need to have memorized the mass of the Sun or the value of G to answer that question" and "Yes, you may go to the washroom".

[see_wolf]

I used to try to read or do my own work, but I've noticed in the last year or two that cheating has gotten much, much worse.  So when I'm not strolling the aisles, standing behind people I've seen cheating on quizzes, and kicking notebooks and bags further under desks, I sit on the front table with my arms crossed over my chest, glaring menacingly at the students.

Unfortunately, my behavior seems to really freak out the conscientious, prone-to-nervous-attack students and does nothing for the hat-wearing cheaters.  (My quiz cheaters are all baseball cap wearers, so I make them take off their hats and put them under their desks for assessment now.)

This was me as an undergrad.  I once was 'patted down' (so to say) by a TA, because as he patrolled, I 'looked nervous'.  I was.  The dude next to me was confidently cheating during a physics exam, and I was afraid I'd get busted along side of him. Instead I was made to take off my black baseball hat (not cool for a chick with medium length hair and a bad case of bed/hat hair), and my calculator was searched for signs of cheating. The boy next to me? Slyly put away his stuff as the TA honed on on me.

OH - and I try to catch up on my professional journals during exams.  I have a decent size classrooms so I can spread the students out.  I walk/look around occasionally but would rather read.  It's me time.

[melba_frilkins]

I used to do a lot of the patrolling stuff. But now I let them use a notecard, so if they are also stuffing notes into their baseball hats, meh, let them have it. (Actually here's the irony: the students who would have been finding clever ways to use cheat notes can't be motivated to use a legit note card. But that's a different thread).

So what do I do

-Try to learn student names (already mentioned by atalanta)
-Take down junk posted on the walls
-Listen to all the sounds that make up a "quiet" room (it's quite a symphony, actually)
-Look at the students' haircuts for inspiration (none found)
-Look at patterns in student dress and wonder
-Write in my academic/professional journal and mull things over

[onion]

-Look at the students' haircuts for inspiration (none found)

Hilarious!

[sputnik]

I actually sit in the back of the classroom, rather the front. This may be easier to do in a lecture hall.
The back of the classroom allows for a better monitoring-vantage-point.
Another plus is the students don't know where I'm looking (or if I'm looking).

Once the first few students start passing in their exams, I begin the alphabetizing process of exams/booklets/answer sheets.

[undisciplined]

I typically bring in a big tote bag full of academic press catalogs -- the ones I lugged home from the latest conference but haven't had a chance to peruse yet. During the exam, I leaf, I peruse, and I circle titles of interest. It requires the perfect level of inattention for the occasion. By the end of the exam, I've pitched a bunch of catalogs, proctored an exam, and identified some new books to purchase and/or teach.

[kedves]

I read a book.  A play is just about the right length for a final exam, and reading it all at once is the best way to read one.

[dept_geek]

I flip through conference proceedings looking for ideas.


I had a prof in undergraduate school that would look around the class until he made eye contact with a student. Then he would laugh.  Crazy man, he was. Good class. Crazy instructor.


(M_F: I also let my students use a notecard. They still fail. Oh well.)

[mad_doctor]

I like standing at the back of the class to make observations about their problem-solving behaviors and strategies.  They suck - really bad.  I use this information to try to help them by telling them about what I was observing and how to fix it, but this seems to have no effect. 

Sometimes I allow cheat sheets w/ formulas (for statistics), sometimes I let them use Excel, sometimes I let them use the Internet.  Nothing seems to help except telling them far in advance that there will be no notes, no open book, no computer, no nothing.  Then a bunch of them will go whining to the Dean about how disrespectful and unnecessarily difficult I am - even though they get better grades when I make them do it w/ no aids or helps!

[polly_mer]

I flip through conference proceedings looking for ideas.


I had a prof in undergraduate school that would look around the class until he made eye contact with a student. Then he would laugh.  Crazy man, he was. Good class. Crazy instructor.


(M_F: I also let my students use a notecard. They still fail. Oh well.)

I had students fail a test on which they brought a double-sided sheet of notes (regular 8.5 in x 11 in paper) and they know that I take more than half of the questions verbatim from the practice test and homeworks.

Some people just want to fail, I guess.

I tend to work on the lesson plans for the lecture after the test while proctoring.  I'm not sure what I will do next semester when I finally get to teach something for which I have a whole semester prepped.  Maybe I'll go wild and read that stack of journal articles I've been ignoring for two months.

[drmooks]

I always start out a test session looking for the wandering eyes and the what not.  I used to start the grading process as soon as the students began to submit their essays.  I hoped the sight of me writing extensive comments would inspire the remaining test takers to avoid cutting any corners in their essays.  Of course, the fatal flaw in this logic is that it is based on the notion that they were watching me grade as opposed to focusing on their own essays. 

[alleyoxenfree]

I look at footwear and wonder and think deep thoughts about it.  Then sweatshirts, count number of colors worn, muse about what looks attractive and what doesn't, try to read their mental and emotional health based on how they're dressed and how they look.  I figure they have all semester to scrutinize me, so I rather enjoy my quiet time scrutinizing them.