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hipgeek
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« Reply #15 on: November 02, 2009, 10:12:07 AM » |
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I don't suppose 'Hi, Unqualified Oldtimersfriend Hack' would cut it, right?
nice! I'd call him "bro" but drag it out, surfer style. Also, don't forget the shoulder bump after the handshake and when you pull back back, snap your fingers then point at him, smiling, as if to say "You're the man!" |
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I have no tolerance for swinish behavior, except from actual swine.
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conjugate
Compulsive punster and insatiable reader, and
Member-Moderator
Distinguished Senior Member
Posts: 16,691
Tends to have warped sense of humor
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« Reply #16 on: November 02, 2009, 10:15:05 AM » |
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I don't suppose 'Hi, Unqualified Oldtimersfriend Hack' would cut it, right?
nice! I'd call him "bro" but drag it out, surfer style. Also, don't forget the shoulder bump after the handshake and when you pull back back, snap your fingers then point at him, smiling, as if to say "You're the man!" "You da man!" I would still consider "Professor" if he teaches, however, as some college presidents I know of have done. |
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Unfortunately, I think conjugate gives good advice.
∀ε>0∃δ>0∋|x–a|<δ⇒|ƒ(x)-ƒ(a)|<ε |
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tinyzombie
She hides the stars under her hair, and is a
Distinguished Senior Member
Posts: 5,597
elevate from this point on - chuck d
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« Reply #17 on: November 02, 2009, 10:17:21 AM » |
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I don't suppose 'Hi, Unqualified Oldtimersfriend Hack' would cut it, right?
nice! I'd call him "bro" but drag it out, surfer style. Also, don't forget the shoulder bump after the handshake and when you pull back back, snap your fingers then point at him, smiling, as if to say "You're the man!" You should pronounce it "brah." I'm always in favor of "Yo, homes." |
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*waving tiny zombie flags* Correct, as usual, TZ. That's because you are not Dude. TZ, however, is Dude. TZ is my favorite. |
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leontrout
Junior member
Posts: 90
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« Reply #18 on: November 02, 2009, 10:51:53 AM » |
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Nuh-uh on "Professor." Dude doesn't teach, never has, and, far as I know, never comes into classroom buildings. (Maybe he comes in during the night and creeps through the halls when there is no one around. I imagine him wearing a cape and giggling like a chipmunk on meth as he steals all our chalk.)
However, there may be a solution to this problem. The committee that nominates honorary doctorate recipients has recently sent out an email that says that, while it is unusual to do so, there is no prohibition to awarding honorary doctorates to current employees of the college. So we--faculty and staff--can just go right ahead and nominate Desmond Tutu or Bill Gates or "a current employee of the college," and that person will have all the rights in the world to call himself "Doctor."
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conjugate
Compulsive punster and insatiable reader, and
Member-Moderator
Distinguished Senior Member
Posts: 16,691
Tends to have warped sense of humor
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« Reply #19 on: November 02, 2009, 10:57:01 AM » |
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Nuh-uh on "Professor." Dude doesn't teach, never has, and, far as I know, never comes into classroom buildings. (Maybe he comes in during the night and creeps through the halls when there is no one around. I imagine him wearing a cape and giggling like a chipmunk on meth as he steals all our chalk.)
Well, then perhaps you should address him as " Aaaa-aaaalvii-iin!!! Or start a movement to have him appointed to the title of David Seville Honorary Professor. |
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Unfortunately, I think conjugate gives good advice.
∀ε>0∃δ>0∋|x–a|<δ⇒|ƒ(x)-ƒ(a)|<ε |
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barred_owl
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« Reply #20 on: November 02, 2009, 11:09:05 AM » |
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I think that, barring any honorary award, you should call him "Mr. Opportunity." <interthreaduality>
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...I can't help rooting for the underdog underbird. |
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southerntransplant
Generally overcaffeinated
Distinguished Senior Member
Posts: 6,855
Am I on YOUR curriculum committee too?
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« Reply #21 on: November 02, 2009, 08:07:52 PM » |
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Lucky
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"Interestingly, many fans find that Seger looks increasingly more like the cereal brand character Captain Crunch as he ages." - Wikipedia entry on Bob Seger.
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drgrieves
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« Reply #22 on: November 04, 2009, 11:37:07 AM » |
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1. At the next faculty-staff get-together smile sweetly at him. Then:
2. Ask "And what did you say your name was. honey?"
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There is a very loud amusement park right in front of my present lodgings.
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the_honey_badger
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« Reply #23 on: November 05, 2009, 05:11:08 PM » |
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"hey, dude!"
Show how collegial and informal you are.
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_____________________________________
"Honey badger don't care."
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post_functional
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« Reply #24 on: November 10, 2009, 02:39:02 PM » |
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The "How to address a dean" thread makes me wonder.
If you are interviewing with a college president who has no doctorate but who has a high opinion of himself, what honorific does an applicant use?
Our president was a longtime friend of oldtimers on campus before ascending to the heights, so most senior faculty call him by first name in meetings, in the cafeteria and when they are discussing his bizarre sexual practices when they are wondering whether to take the kids trickortreating at his house. But he doesn't like it, and we junior faculty know that first name is not up for grabs, "Mr." makes him flinch, and "Dr." is just wrong. So we mainly jump into bushes when we see him coming.
Do you seriously suspect he's dangerous to children? |
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Action is his reward.
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leontrout
Junior member
Posts: 90
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« Reply #25 on: November 10, 2009, 03:52:06 PM » |
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On the chance that I have revealed who I am and what school I work for, I feel that it is legally incumbent on me to say that, no, I do not think he is a threat to small children.
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conjugate
Compulsive punster and insatiable reader, and
Member-Moderator
Distinguished Senior Member
Posts: 16,691
Tends to have warped sense of humor
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« Reply #26 on: November 11, 2009, 10:53:45 AM » |
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The "How to address a dean" thread makes me wonder.
If you are interviewing with a college president who has no doctorate but who has a high opinion of himself, what honorific does an applicant use?
Our president was a longtime friend of oldtimers on campus before ascending to the heights, so most senior faculty call him by first name in meetings, in the cafeteria and when they are discussing his bizarre sexual practices when they are wondering whether to take the kids trickortreating at his house. But he doesn't like it, and we junior faculty know that first name is not up for grabs, "Mr." makes him flinch, and "Dr." is just wrong. So we mainly jump into bushes when we see him coming.
Do you seriously suspect he's dangerous to children? On the chance that I have revealed who I am and what school I work for, I feel that it is legally incumbent on me to say that, no, I do not think he is a threat to small children.
Sounds more like he's a threat to faculty. Especially if those bushes have thorns. |
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Unfortunately, I think conjugate gives good advice.
∀ε>0∃δ>0∋|x–a|<δ⇒|ƒ(x)-ƒ(a)|<ε |
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