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[the_honey_badger]

My gap isn't that large but I learned that since it didn't bother him, it was ridiculous for it to bother me.
It did, however, bother my Nana until the day she died: "How is that young husband of yours?"  It irritated me for year, it amused him. All both of you need is a sense of humor.

[mystictechgal]

My advice?  Go for it.  Neither one of you is in the cradle.  Have fun.

I like that "half your age plus seven" rule.  I'll have to keep that one in mind for someday, myself.  ;-)

[tee_bee]

My wife's BFF married a guy 9 years younger--he was in his mid-30s at the time. Maybe it's 11 years. Anyway, they are among the most functional and fun couples I know. I say, go for it. Sounds fun!

[historywoman]

Mr. HW is 10 years younger than me.  Like you, OP, we met as friends.  I thought he was the "squirreliest" man whom I had ever met. He was, and he still is.  I find it quite charming.  Of course, I'm nuts, so it works out quite well.

We've been married 18 years.  He is frequently is the most mature person in the house.  His mother claims that was born a little old man. I agree.

Go for it.  Enjoy!  You'll never regret it.

HW 

[thundering_m]

What a refreshing change from the cliched Dr. Geezer discarding the naturally and similarly aging first wife for Boobs McPerky, grad student.

[tamiam]

Chime! Jump him.

[tee_bee]

What a refreshing change from the cliched Dr. Geezer discarding the naturally and similarly aging first wife for Boobs McPerky, grad student.

True, but what if older fellah was widowed or unmarried and wanted to date a somewhat/much younger woman.

The fact that I am almost 50 has absolutely no bearing on this question. None. You're sick to even think it.

[commcycle]

I thought he was the "squirreliest" man whom I had ever met.

Of course, I'm nuts.

He stores you in secret locations for the winter? (blinks)

[cgfunmathguy]

I thought he was the "squirreliest" man whom I had ever met.

Of course, I'm nuts.

He stores you in secret locations for the winter? (blinks)

That could be fun. ;-)

[thundering_m]

What a refreshing change from the cliched Dr. Geezer discarding the naturally and similarly aging first wife for Boobs McPerky, grad student.

True, but what if older fellah was widowed or unmarried and wanted to date a somewhat/much younger woman.

The fact that I am almost 50 has absolutely no bearing on this question. None. You're sick to even think it.

? Where did that come from, TeeBee? I was agreeing w/LarryC, Kedves, and others that the OP and intended are of the same generation and therefore it makes no difference. I was further suggesting that there is no ethical impropriety, either.  Geezer w/ex +grad student who pre-dates the divorce is a pretty common occurrence. Sheesh.

To be more blunt: when you are in a position of authority with the public's trust, as university professors are, you need to live it above reproach, or expect to be reproached. 

[collegekidsmom]

I think the big issue at those ages usually relate to someone wanting to have a child, or someone has a few younger kids. There often is a sense of urgency for the 40 year old. Since both of you already have kids, don't want more, and the kids are the same age, you are really at the same stage of things. That makes it easier.
Then you can just focus on fun and compatibility and all the good stuff. If one of you is uncomfortable about the age difference, that will make it an issue of course.

[tee_bee]

What a refreshing change from the cliched Dr. Geezer discarding the naturally and similarly aging first wife for Boobs McPerky, grad student.

True, but what if older fellah was widowed or unmarried and wanted to date a somewhat/much younger woman.

The fact that I am almost 50 has absolutely no bearing on this question. None. You're sick to even think it.

? Where did that come from, TeeBee? I was agreeing w/LarryC, Kedves, and others that the OP and intended are of the same generation and therefore it makes no difference. I was further suggesting that there is no ethical impropriety, either.  Geezer w/ex +grad student who pre-dates the divorce is a pretty common occurrence. Sheesh.

To be more blunt: when you are in a position of authority with the public's trust, as university professors are, you need to live it above reproach, or expect to be reproached. 

Sorry. I was goofing on myself. My more subtle point was that the older prof/younger woman is so common as to be come a staple of academic lore. But I did have a serious point--if a single, older male professor dates a younger female person/colleague, it still sets tongues to wagging, even if the female partner (sorry, I'm assuming het couples) is not a grad student, is roughly close to the same generation, poses no ethical problems or dilemmas, etc.

The reference to my being about 50 is a too-subtle suggestion that I am no longer as young as I think I am. Sigh.

I entirely agree with your point about dumping the wife to take up with someone else. It's really icky. This is called Jack Welch syndrome, although JW's wife was at least able to extract a good deal of cash from the cad.

Carry on. I will fire my joke writer (myself) after hitting "post."

[pollinate]

One half my age plus seven?   Hummmmmm.... that expands the field quite nicely!

[conjugate]

What a refreshing change from the cliched Dr. Geezer discarding the naturally and similarly aging first wife for Boobs McPerky, grad student.

True, but what if older fellah was widowed or unmarried and wanted to date a somewhat/much younger woman.

The fact that I am almost 50 has absolutely no bearing on this question. None. You're sick to even think it.

? Where did that come from, TeeBee? I was agreeing w/LarryC, Kedves, and others that the OP and intended are of the same generation and therefore it makes no difference. I was further suggesting that there is no ethical impropriety, either.  Geezer w/ex +grad student who pre-dates the divorce is a pretty common occurrence. Sheesh.

To be more blunt: when you are in a position of authority with the public's trust, as university professors are, you need to live it above reproach, or expect to be reproached. 

I think TeeBee was joking.  I, on the other hand, am not married, and as a result would be very interested in Boobs McPerky's phone number.  Especially as I am currently at a school with no graduate program and so would welcome a graduate student, over whom I would not be in a position of authority.  Now:

I think the big issue at those ages usually relate to someone wanting to have a child, or someone has a few younger kids. There often is a sense of urgency for the 40 year old. Since both of you already have kids, don't want more, and the kids are the same age, you are really at the same stage of things. That makes it easier.
Then you can just focus on fun and compatibility and all the good stuff. If one of you is uncomfortable about the age difference, that will make it an issue of course.

Yes, this is one reason why I wouldn't mind finding a younger potential spouse; I wouldn't mind a kid or two of my own.  I tried out my ex's kid, and found I did okay with her (though in comparison with my ex, it would have been hard not to do well—or should I refrain from cattiness?)

[lurquita]

Age is just a number!  It's all about the life stage and the emotional maturity and the matching goals of the couple.  My last SO was fifteen years younger than I am (no, he was NOT an undergraduate--he had his own small business and made a heck of a lot more money than I probably ever will) and my current one is eighteen years older.  Since I doubt that I will ever allow anyone to lure me into matrimony, and since I don't think that I want children (although maybe I'll pull an Angelina Jolie when I'm tenured), I go for guys that are fun, smart, and driven.  I don't think too much about age.  I like smart guys who are kind of workaholic, probably because I'm a smart woman who is a workaholic.  And a little eccentric, there always has to be the quirk somewhere.  But age?  Meh.  Hottie guys are hottie guys, whether they are in their early twenties or their early sixties.

:D

Lurqui