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[studentaffairsgal]

It seems everything I did last week went wrong. And not just "not what I expected" wrong, but wrong to the point that my supervisor was all over my butt (and with good reason). I'm trying not to dwell on my missteps and simply chalk it up to being human, but I can't quite shake the feeling that my relationship with my supervisor has been damaged. Anyone have any suggestions about repairing our relationship and/or my reputation?

[yellowtractor]

It was a terrible week all around, judging by other threads (which see).  And, as per those other threads, so much depends on the institutional culture at your workplace.

If it were me, I would probably sit down with my supervisor--if I could find a relatively stress-free moment, for both of us--and say "Look, I realize last week was pretty terrible.  I know I bungled X and Y.  I'm struggling with Z and Q.  Can we talk about this?"  I would adopt a friendly, apologetic, constructive tone (regardless of my feelings about last week or said supervisor).  But then, (a) I am that type of aboveboard, problem-solving person, and (b) the institutional culture here at HappySLAC would support such a move, regardless of whether the supervisor in question welcomed it.

I can imagine such an approach devolving into nightmare very, very quickly in other settings.  It might or might not be better to write off last week and plunge back into the fray with renewed determination on Monday, without saying anything at all to anyone.  Only you can make that call.  Good luck.

[studentaffairsgal]

My one-on-one meeting is scheduled for Monday mornings, so at least I won't have to try and schedule additional time to talk out these problems.

At the end of the day, I am simply embarrassed by my performance and that of my students during the past 7 days. The silver lining of all these shennanigans is probably that no matter how badly I screw up, it won't be as bad as my predecessor screwed up. My plan of attack (?) is to walk in, sit down, and try to address all the concerns before she can (at least that way she'll know I'm not oblivious to my week).

I just hope I don't drive myself nuts between now and Monday at 10am overthinking, overanalyzing and making mountains out of molehills ...

[der_gadfly]

If it were me, I would probably sit down with my supervisor--if I could find a relatively stress-free moment, for both of us--and say "Look, I realize last week was pretty terrible.  I know I bungled X and Y.  I'm struggling with Z and Q.  Can we talk about this?"  I would adopt a friendly, apologetic, constructive tone (regardless of my feelings about last week or said supervisor). 

EXTREMELY sage advice. Everyone has a bad week on occasion. Whatever cosmic confluence caused the problems may well melt away over the weekend. Nothing you can do in themeantime.

I had a similar situation years ago, not in academia, but the supervisors (yes two) were really ticked off at me. I went in and just put it on the line: no excuses, no apologies, just an honest assessment that things got the best of me and that my biggest error was in NOT asking for advice/assistance when I needed it. YMMV, but I think that this is a good approach.

[reslifeguy]

I had this happen last year, and the situation contributed to the burnout I've experienced. I misunderstood about turning in paperwork; my supervisor thought I was blatantly turning things in late. She refused to believe I misunderstood, etc. We had a long conversation, things were fine. I went home for a weekend (pre-arranged months beforehand) and came back to a letter stating I was on job probation because my "emotional reaction" wasn't what she wanted. I just acknowledged concerns, addressed them, and put steps into place to prevent the same issue from cropping up; I didn't realize I was supposed to cry or otherwise exhibit an emotional response to something mundane.

Our entire relationship then came to focus on that one time I made a mistake; if 97% of my performance was above average, she'd constantly bring up the time that 3% wasn't. So, best of luck to you. My experience in a similar situation didn't turn out well.