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Author Topic: Most entertaining student sentences, Fall 2009  (Read 120280 times)
airball
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« on: September 10, 2009, 12:17:22 PM »

Now it has a thread...

"One couples began to court, it was often important to be sure that they not only liked one another, but also that the community approved of their coupling."

I had this image (likely thanks to When Harry Met Sally) of the neighbors watching the coupling, and scoring it on originality, execution and degree of difficulty.

airball
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History would kick your ass around the Bodleian Library, and then it would smile and laugh.
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creeolina
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« Reply #1 on: September 10, 2009, 1:28:44 PM »

I'm so glad you started this.

Fresh from today's stack:
"Aside from being a student, XXXXX tries to even out her spare time by spending time with her 2-year-old boyfriend XXXXX....."

The subject is a 21-year-old college student.
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tasslehoff
like a bright shiny penny
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« Reply #2 on: September 10, 2009, 11:40:49 PM »

I originally posted this under the Spring 2009 thread and then I saw this one. So I repost here:

"This college has many impunities for me in the field of my choice."

I assume this student meant opportunities. ironically her major is Criminal Justice.

-Tas






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"The sea is emotion incarnate. It loves, hates, and weeps. It defies all attempts to capture it with words and rejects all shackles. Now matter what you say about it, there is always that which you can't." -Brom (from Eragon)
galactic_hedgehog
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« Reply #3 on: September 11, 2009, 12:06:36 AM »

Could she mean "impurities"?
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dr_evil
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« Reply #4 on: September 11, 2009, 12:08:27 AM »

Not a sentence, but still entertaining.  I had a student who didn't have a stapler for an assignment use DUCT TAPE.  I found it quite funny.
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Wheeeeee! You go, oh evilicious one.
scampster
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« Reply #5 on: September 11, 2009, 12:10:49 AM »

Not a sentence, but still entertaining.  I had a student who didn't have a stapler for an assignment use DUCT TAPE.  I found it quite funny.

Duct tape! What can't it do?!

Now of course, we know the definitive answer to the staple/paper clip question.
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When you are a scientist your opinions and prejudices become facts. Science is like magic that way!
tasslehoff
like a bright shiny penny
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« Reply #6 on: September 11, 2009, 8:50:29 AM »

Could she mean "impurities"?

I don't think she meant impurities. It wouldn't fit with the rest of the paragraph. To me it only makes sense if she meant opportunities, but that is a big typo. Of course she consistently used 'no' for 'know' and 'an' for 'and' and 'then' for 'than'. But to my relief, she did graduate 4th in her high school class. Her writing was one of the best in the group. Spelling aside, her paper was well developed and thought out. Wish I could say the same of most of the others.
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"The sea is emotion incarnate. It loves, hates, and weeps. It defies all attempts to capture it with words and rejects all shackles. Now matter what you say about it, there is always that which you can't." -Brom (from Eragon)
conjugate
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Tends to have warped sense of humor


« Reply #7 on: September 11, 2009, 11:02:00 AM »

Could she mean "impurities"?

I don't think she meant impurities. It wouldn't fit with the rest of the paragraph. To me it only makes sense if she meant opportunities, but that is a big typo. Of course she consistently used 'no' for 'know' and 'an' for 'and' and 'then' for 'than'. But to my relief, she did graduate 4th in her high school class. Her writing was one of the best in the group. Spelling aside, her paper was well developed and thought out. Wish I could say the same of most of the others.

My guess is that it's a big typo together with a spellcheck suggestion.  If she hit the "i" key instead of the "o" for the first letter of "opportunities" the spellcheck might have found "impurities" as the closest match; since "i" and "o" are next to each other on the standard QWERTY keyboard, it's possible.
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Unfortunately, I think conjugate gives good advice.
∀ε>0∃δ>0∋|xa|<δ⇒|(x)-(a)|<ε
concordancia
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« Reply #8 on: September 11, 2009, 3:59:54 PM »

One of the positive stereotypes about Americans is that Hispanics realize that American don't eat the typical diet associated with Americans, like fried chicken, pizza and hamburgers. Stereotypes are not always true and many people depend on them to comprehend another person or culture. Stereotypes are not bad and a representation of the good of somebody.

And a reminder to wait until you finish silly student's grading before posting to this thread.

« Last Edit: September 11, 2009, 4:03:24 PM by concordancia » Logged

I like money.  I like to buy stuff and experiences with money.  
historyphd
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« Reply #9 on: September 11, 2009, 9:20:13 PM »


Student: "So Protestants and Catholics are both Christians?"

Me: "Umm, yes."

Me in the back of my head: "Why are you in college?"
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eumaios
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« Reply #10 on: September 11, 2009, 9:42:34 PM »


Student: "So Protestants and Catholics are both Christians?"

Me: "Umm, yes."

Me in the back of my head: "Why are you in college?"

A student who came to our writing center was stunned to learn that Jews aren't Christians. "You mean they don't believe in Jesus?" I think she left still thinking that the tutor had lied to her.
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present_mirth
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« Reply #11 on: September 11, 2009, 9:50:57 PM »

"Othello proves his undying love of Desdemona by murdering her through his usage of language and through his use of literary aspects."

That's, um, a strange murder weapon.
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magistra
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discolor unde auri per ramos aura refulsit.


« Reply #12 on: September 11, 2009, 11:47:56 PM »

Not really.  Haven't you wanted to die of boredom while listening to some gasbag go on and on at a faculty meeting?  Haven't you at least wanted to reach for a dagger?
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First it was Wolfram and Hart, now it's Blackboard.  There's not much moral difference, if you ask me. -- Malcha

Grammar is the chocolate in the buttery croissant of life.  -- Yellowtractor

Okay, so that was petty.  Today, I feel like embracing pettiness.  -- Mended Drum
galactic_hedgehog
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« Reply #13 on: September 12, 2009, 12:12:13 AM »

I always thought that Shakespeare used powerful language.
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mountainguy
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« Reply #14 on: September 12, 2009, 12:52:50 AM »


Student: "So Protestants and Catholics are both Christians?"

Me: "Umm, yes."

Me in the back of my head: "Why are you in college?"

While I agree the student sounds clueless, I have some understanding of what cause the confusion. In MountainState, independent evangelical and fundamentalist churches tended to do a poor job of providing students with education indoctrination about different religious faiths. They're taught to identify as Christians only and learn nothing about the Reformation, etc. Hopefully students pick up some of that history in school, but it's easy for that to fall through the cracks. Sigh. No wonder why so many Americans are ignorant.
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