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[namazu]

conjugate, students tell me to my face that I am intimidating. I just don't get how a short fat cuddly old woman is intimidating! Hmph!

You realise that you've just described Queen Victoria, don't you?

Well, it could be worse. At least you didn't say Dolores Umbridge.

Or Hyacinth Bucket!

It's pronounced Bou-quet, dear.

[octoprof]

conjugate, students tell me to my face that I am intimidating. I just don't get how a short fat cuddly old woman is intimidating! Hmph!

You realise that you've just described Queen Victoria, don't you?

Well, it could be worse. At least you didn't say Dolores Umbridge.

Or Hyacinth Bucket!

It's pronounced Bou-quet, dear.

Imelda was also funny as Charlotte Jennings Palmer in Sense & Sensibility.

I wonder if I can find a pink dress and be Dolores Umbridge for Halloween...

[llanfair]

conjugate, students tell me to my face that I am intimidating. I just don't get how a short fat cuddly old woman is intimidating! Hmph!

You realise that you've just described Queen Victoria, don't you?

Well, it could be worse. At least you didn't say Dolores Umbridge.

Or Hyacinth Bucket!

It's pronounced Bou-quet, dear.

Imelda was also funny as Charlotte Jennings Palmer in Sense & Sensibility.

I wonder if I can find a pink dress and be Dolores Umbridge for Halloween...

I shall be Queen Vic for Hallowe'en one fine year.  A bonus: I won't have to diet!

[t_r_b]

conjugate, students tell me to my face that I am intimidating. I just don't get how a short fat cuddly old woman is intimidating! Hmph!

You realise that you've just described Queen Victoria, don't you?

Well, it could be worse. At least you didn't say Dolores Umbridge.

Or Hyacinth Bucket!

It's pronounced Bou-quet, dear.

You certainly have the pronunciation down, but who has ever described Hyacinth Bucket as "cuddly"?

Her sister Daisy, of course, is another story.

[llanfair]

That's true - Hyacinth was more prickly than cuddly.  But then, so was Queen Victoria - I'm 0 for 2.

[punchnpie]

I'm bumping this thread to find out if I am being over-sensitive, elitist, or what.

I have received a number of solicitations for money from my doctoral program. All of them begin with 'Ms. Punchnpie.'  People, I spent years and much moola earning a doctorate at your fair institution, could you call me Dr. Punchnpie? Professor? Punchnpie, PhD?

Today I get a request to do some administrative thing from my employing institution. It is from someone I've met once, but who frequently deals with my department and should know all the TT faculty in it.  In the Heading, they've put Punchnpie, Former Degree, PhD.  But the Greeting is to 'Ms. Punchnpie.' 

I would have felt better if both institutions had just called me by my first name, but this 'Ms' thing when they want something from me just irks me no end.  Forumites, should I chillax?  Is this some new standard greeting with which I am unfamiliar? I dunno - why put the title in the letter if you aren't going to use it?

[madhatter]

Databases don't care if they hurt your feelings.

[glowdart]

I'd be irritated, if only because I know that many schools can manage to figure this s*** out.  (All of my alma maters have me down as Dr., too, so it isn't like it can't be done.)

You know damned well that the major donors get put into the database correctly.

[kedves]

I'm bumping this thread to find out if I am being over-sensitive, elitist, or what.

I have received a number of solicitations for money from my doctoral program. All of them begin with 'Ms. Punchnpie.'  People, I spent years and much moola earning a doctorate at your fair institution, could you call me Dr. Punchnpie? Professor? Punchnpie, PhD?

Today I get a request to do some administrative thing from my employing institution. It is from someone I've met once, but who frequently deals with my department and should know all the TT faculty in it.  In the Heading, they've put Punchnpie, Former Degree, PhD.  But the Greeting is to 'Ms. Punchnpie.' 

I would have felt better if both institutions had just called me by my first name, but this 'Ms' thing when they want something from me just irks me no end.  Forumites, should I chillax?  Is this some new standard greeting with which I am unfamiliar? I dunno - why put the title in the letter if you aren't going to use it?

Get the director of graduate annual giving's name from the school website and send an informative letter.  It would be helpful.  This merge program has been written to fill the salutation with Ms. or Mr. for ALL alumni and alumnae, and who knows how many other people the office is alienating.  At the very least, it gives an impression of cluelessness.

[the_honey_badger]

I'd be irritated, if only because I know that many schools can manage to figure this s*** out.  (All of my alma maters have me down as Dr., too, so it isn't like it can't be done.)

You know damned well that the major donors get put into the database correctly.

When I got my PhD I happily reported it to my BA Alma Mater "classnotes."  Unfailingly I get mail from that university no matter what office it originates from as "Dr. Radar." 

Now, my PhD granting institution's alumi association? Yeah, "Ms."  And, the alumni association is the organization that one week after commencement sent me a "congrats Dr. Radar!" card.
Lazy and cheap---but that pretty much sums up my long term impression of my doctoral institution.

[phlegmatic]

Huh...I figured they would all call us "Dr." in order to get more money! When I got the random phone call for "Dr. Firstname Phlegmatic" I felt all proud, and then I realized it was just my PhD-granting institution asking for money. I didn't give them any money (what with the 5 months between last PhD paycheck and first TT paycheck), but I appreciated the phone call for "Dr. Phlegmatic"!

[punchnpie]

Thanks for everyone's responses. I am glad I don't have to chillax (which I don't do well) and can be rightfully indignant (which I do very well).

And yes, as I learned that databases don't care if they hurt my feelings when the ambulance company kept sending bills for my husband's 'last ride,' a bill that had been paid, mind you. Returning the bills marked 'paid, check your records' didn't help. I finally had to call and act all ethnic to get them to stop. Maybe I can go ethnic on my alma mater's development office?  Maybe they'd even stop asking me for money. It's a thought.

[peppergal]

I'd be irritated, if only because I know that many schools can manage to figure this s*** out.  (All of my alma maters have me down as Dr., too, so it isn't like it can't be done.)

You know damned well that the major donors get put into the database correctly.

I got all my degrees (BA, MA, PhD) from the same institution.  And every year, I get three letters and three phone calls begging for money.  The letters are all addressed to Ms. Peppergal, and arrive within a couple days of each other.  The phone calls all come within 72 hours.  I think my first priority will be to get the university to realize that Peppergal, BA, Peppergal, MA, and Peppergal, PhD are all the same person.  Then I'll worry about Ms. vs. Dr.

[alleyoxenfree]

Think of the stationery they could save if they figured out you're the same person.

This seems worth its own thread.  Cost saving ideas from the trenches. 

My Ph.D. institution sends to Dr. Oxenfree.  But it is puzzling why so many faculty recruitments send me letters that start without it.  Do they think I'm applying to a job that requires one and don't have one?  Passive-aggression by the department admin?  Just don't think it's an accomplishment worth noting (I bet they don't refer to their proctologist as Earl)?

[rowan1]

My new Uni sent out a welcome letter to my spouse when we first got here - some kind of "faculty spouses Club" thingy.

Now, Dado and I don't share a last name and he has a first name that is occassionally used for women (think "Tony" for the sake of this post) - although not usually with his spelling.  My name is very obviously feminine.

So we didn't quiet know what to do with a letter addressed to "Mrs. Tony Mylastname"

Needless to say Dado did not join the faculty spouses club.