octoprof
Member-Moderator
Distinguished Senior Member
Posts: 30,804
Life is short. Love your loved ones while you can.
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« Reply #1935 on: October 28, 2009, 06:35:48 PM » |
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After a student flunked the first test, and received an A- on the second:
Student: You know what I did differently?
Me: What?
Student: I went back and looked at all of the readings. It really helped.
Me: Blink. I had nothing. I'm really disappointed in you, airball. You should have had a snappy comeback for that! If nothing else, a wide-eyed smile, and "GOOD!" in an only faintly sarcastic voice. I'm not very creative on the spot. I'd probably just have said,"REALLY???????" in a completely incredulous and over acted way. |
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It is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities. Professor Dumbledore
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elsie
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« Reply #1936 on: October 28, 2009, 06:45:57 PM » |
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After a student flunked the first test, and received an A- on the second:
Student: You know what I did differently?
Me: What?
Student: I went back and looked at all of the readings. It really helped.
Me: Blink. I had nothing. I'm really disappointed in you, airball. You should have had a snappy comeback for that! If nothing else, a wide-eyed smile, and "GOOD!" in an only faintly sarcastic voice. I'm not very creative on the spot. I'd probably just have said,"REALLY???????" in a completely incredulous and over acted way. I'd say, "Yep, that's how it works." |
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"People assume that time is a strict progression from cause to effect. But actually, from a non-linear, non-subjective viewpoint, it's more like a big ball of wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey stuff." - the Doctor
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mountainguy
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« Reply #1937 on: October 28, 2009, 07:02:17 PM » |
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Student: You know what I did differently?
Me: What?
Student: I went back and looked at all of the readings. It really helped.
Me: Blink. I had nothing.
This reminds me of one end of a student on a cell-phone conversation I overhead a few months ago. Student: The class is really unfair. (pause). Student: Yeah, I didn't understand his lectures at all. And then I figured you have to do the reading before you go to class. What's that about? |
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tasslehoff
like a bright shiny penny
Junior member
Posts: 92
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« Reply #1938 on: October 28, 2009, 09:46:07 PM » |
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Snowflake 1: Dr. Tas what can I do to pass your class? This is the only class I am failing. (doubtful)
Me: Well, you can come to class. You have missed a total of 12 days. You can turn in your homework. You are missing 5 of 9 assignments for a 0/90 points. You can study for your exams, you have a 37 average.
SF 1: Oh, can't you just give me an extra point assignment?
Me: No Snowflake I cannot. When you start doing your work and showing me you can and will invest time and energy in your education, then I will consider investing extra time and energy in your education by giving you an extra assignment to catch up.
SF 1: <Blank stare> Oh ok. Thank you.
--------
Snowflake 2: Dr. Tas, I need help. What can I do differently to pass your tests?
Me: Well what are you doing to prepare for the tests now?
SF 2: I studied for 45 minutes. I read through the notes and I read some of the chapter.
Me: And how did that work out for you?
SF 2: Yea I guess I need to study more.
Ya think?! (thought and not spoken)
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"The sea is emotion incarnate. It loves, hates, and weeps. It defies all attempts to capture it with words and rejects all shackles. Now matter what you say about it, there is always that which you can't." -Brom (from Eragon)
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polly_mer
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« Reply #1939 on: October 29, 2009, 07:50:58 AM » |
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For the record, this conversation lasted 50 minutes. The highlights are:
Student: What am I getting in this class?
Polly: Well, I don't have to add up the points to tell you that it's not going to be more than a D.
Student: But what's the number?
Polly: Let's focus on the fact that you haven't turned in several assignments, haven't done most of the on-line quizzes, and your last test was very low.
Student: I did some of those quizzes.
Polly: Well, let's pull up your profile and look. See here, you are credited with starting the quiz, but there aren't any answers.
Student: There were answers when I submitted it.
Polly: I will log out, you can log in as you, and then we can check the answers you saved.
Student: Yeah, let's do that. Hey, why aren't there any answers here either?
Polly: We know you didn't submit them because otherwise your test would have been marked submitted. So did you save your answers?
Student: There were answers here.
Polly: And if you don't save them or submit them, I cannot grade them. See here, on the next quiz, you did manage to submit answers so I know you can do it. But that's just a small fraction of your grade. Let's focus on what you can do for the rest of the semester. The project is 10%, the portfolio is 10%, the final is 15%, you have another test at 10%, and the participation grade is 5%. That's 50% of the grade still within your control to get. B to C performance on those things combined with B to C performance on your future assignments, quizzes, and in-class work will get you a C as a final grade.
Student: It's not fair that I have to do a portfolio because I'm not going to be a teacher.
Polly: You signed up for this class. The grade includes doing a portfolio. However, you can do a portfolio around things you want to show your friends and family.
Student: But nobody cares about science demonstrations.
Polly: So you're saying that you can't go on YouTube and make people watch the Silly Putty being dropped from the high building and see it shatter? Nobody will ever want to see the Mentos fountains?
Student: Oh. Well, yeah. I guess I could talk about the thing we did as kids where we put toilet cleaner in pop bottles, sealed them with aluminum foil, and toss them into the parking lot to see them explode.
Polly: That sounds like you have your chemistry demonstration prepared.
Student: But what about field trips? Nobody wants to go on a science field trip.
Polly: Are you telling me that you couldn't plan a trip to the brewery because no one would endour the tour to get free beer at the end? Are you seriously telling me that you cannot plan a trip to the amusement park and get a worksheet off the internet about the physics of rollercoasters? C'mon.
Student: Yeah, I could do that. But it's still not fair and that's a lot of work to get a C in this class.
Polly: Life is unfair. But if you want a C, then you have to do the work.
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You can never know everything, and part of what you do know will always be wrong. Perhaps even the most important part. A portion of wisdom lies in knowing this. A portion of courage lies in going on anyway.
--Robert Jordan
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galactic_hedgehog
Procrastinating, Python-quoting, Blue Blazer-drinking, chocolate-chip cookie-eating, Pastafarian, Not So
Distinguished Senior Member
Posts: 17,915
Mind Ninja
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« Reply #1940 on: October 29, 2009, 08:02:33 AM » |
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[I]f you want a C, then you have to do the work.
No wonder I could never manage a C. |
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« Last Edit: October 29, 2009, 08:04:13 AM by galactic_hedgehog »
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"A pun is primâ facie an insult to the person you are talking with. It implies utter indifference to or sublime contempt for his remarks, no matter how serious." -- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr. Hedgie loves to read. |
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cc_alan
is a wossname
Distinguished Senior Member
Posts: 6,885
Caution! Nekkid zamboni driver ahead.
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« Reply #1941 on: October 29, 2009, 09:26:07 AM » |
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[I]f you want a C, then you have to do the work.
No wonder I could never manage a C. Wow... that really wasn't fair, Galahog. <insert "totally" and "whoa" and "dude" where necessary> Alan |
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Excuse me... which aisle would I find the unicorns and rainbows? No, Alan is a man among men, striding the Earth like a Colossus with a really big bladder, wearing a tool belt.
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polly_mer
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« Reply #1942 on: October 29, 2009, 11:55:20 AM » |
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[I]f you want a C, then you have to do the work.
No wonder I could never manage a C. Wow... that really wasn't fair, Galahog. <insert "totally" and "whoa" and "dude" where necessary> Alan Totally. I mean, like did you tell the profs how much other stuff you hadda to do? Couldn't they work with you and, you know, cut you a break? Damn, dude. Them's some cranky old farts who just don't know what it's like to be a student and have to, ya know, party to release a little stress. I mean, damn. Ya know? |
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You can never know everything, and part of what you do know will always be wrong. Perhaps even the most important part. A portion of wisdom lies in knowing this. A portion of courage lies in going on anyway.
--Robert Jordan
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galactic_hedgehog
Procrastinating, Python-quoting, Blue Blazer-drinking, chocolate-chip cookie-eating, Pastafarian, Not So
Distinguished Senior Member
Posts: 17,915
Mind Ninja
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« Reply #1943 on: October 29, 2009, 04:03:54 PM » |
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[I]f you want a C, then you have to do the work.
No wonder I could never manage a C. Wow... that really wasn't fair, Galahog. <insert "totally" and "whoa" and "dude" where necessary> Alan Totally. I mean, like did you tell the profs how much other stuff you hadda to do? Couldn't they work with you and, you know, cut you a break? Damn, dude. Them's some cranky old farts who just don't know what it's like to be a student and have to, ya know, party to release a little stress. I mean, damn. Ya know? There were parties? I was reading my comic books. |
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"A pun is primâ facie an insult to the person you are talking with. It implies utter indifference to or sublime contempt for his remarks, no matter how serious." -- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr. Hedgie loves to read. |
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phlegmatic
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« Reply #1944 on: October 29, 2009, 10:32:58 PM » |
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This morning one of my students cried and left the classroom because a film we were watching was personally disturbing to her. (Really, it was, I'm not making fun of this.) But this evening, I get an email asking to take the final early because of a "family event." I am somewhat meanly thinking that the request was strategically asked this same day, though...I'm going to wait a few days to respond...Guess this is a "favorite" conversation and email.
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locutus
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« Reply #1945 on: October 30, 2009, 03:08:34 PM » |
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After a student flunked the first test, and received an A- on the second:
Student: You know what I did differently?
Me: What?
Student: I went back and looked at all of the readings. It really helped.
Me: Blink. I had nothing.
Required graduate student class. The class before the first big test ends, students begin packing up notes and whatnot. One of the students stands up and loudly says to no one in particular You know what really helps me with things like this? Going back and rereading the articles.I had to bite my tongue. |
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Render unto Geedorah what is Geedorah's.
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mended_drum
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« Reply #1946 on: October 31, 2009, 01:07:40 AM » |
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Today in class, a pair of student just couldn't stop chatting. Here's what happened:
Me: "If you two don't hush and pay attention, I'm going to get really ironic with you!"
Basketball player in the back row: "No, Dr. mended_drum! Don't use irony on the sophomores! They're not ready!"
I love this class.
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profxfiles
I Am Not, Nor Have I Ever Been A Card-Carrying
Distinguished Senior Member
Posts: 1,287
I am the grading Jedi
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« Reply #1947 on: November 01, 2009, 06:52:21 AM » |
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Today in class, a pair of student just couldn't stop chatting. Here's what happened:
Me: "If you two don't hush and pay attention, I'm going to get really ironic with you!"
Basketball player in the back row: "No, Dr. mended_drum! Don't use irony on the sophomores! They're not ready!"
I love this class.
That was AWESOME! |
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"Personally, I liked the university. They gave us money and facilities, we didn't have to produce anything... You've never been out of the university. You don't know what it's like out there! I've worked in the private sector...they expect results."
--Dan Aykroyd in Ghostbusters
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punchnpie
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« Reply #1948 on: November 01, 2009, 06:30:35 PM » |
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It's just amazing reading these student comments.
I want to take a moment and thank the nuns who educated me. While I was as happy as the next person to be in a class that wasn't too taxing, never for one minute did I ever think that school wasn't work, wasn't fair, was supposed to make you do things you normally don't do, or that the teacher 'gave' me a grade. I earned all of them, good or bad, and it was no use going to Sister to see if she could change the grade - or go to my parents for that matter. These students must be coddled like crazy before they get to college. None of this behavior would have been tolerated where I went to school.
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What about all them other professors – ain’t they your kin? Good God, no. I loathe them and they loathe me. – Sunset Limited
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dr_evil
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« Reply #1949 on: November 02, 2009, 02:30:22 PM » |
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I have an exam coming up in one of my classes. Returning Adult Snowflake (who really should be old enough to know better) states that "the exam would be so much easier if we could use our notes." DE: My job is not to make the exam easy, but to test what you know. If you know the material, you will do fine. RAS: Are you going to have a review session? DE: Yes, it will be <at such and such time>. RAS: I can't make it then. Can't you reschedule it? DE did say: You can still make an appointment to discuss things outside of the review. DE would love to say: Yes, I'll just reschedule everything around you. Sadly many others complained about the review time - a review that it is not required I give, but I am doing a favor for them. I am so tired of not being appreciated. |
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Drinking a lot always helps.
Wheeeeee! You go, oh evilicious one.
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