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shrimp
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« on: May 12, 2008, 09:06:46 PM » |
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We have 2 dogs, one who is very old and probably won't make it much longer and a much younger one. They are our kids and our life tends to revolve around them. Recently, our middle dog passed away unexpectedly. It has been very hard for us but even harder for the younger dog since the old one doesn't really play with him, and he doted on his big sister. We know that we want to adopt another dog soon (probably aim for one that is young but not a puppy) but are trying to figure out when. To add some complications, I am expecting a human baby in December and am starting a new tt position in the fall. So we are moving cross-country this summer and will drive with the dogs. Here are our options: 1) adopt a new dog now so we can work on getting her settled in during the summer since we are off of work and before we move. pros - more time; cons - driving cross-country with 3 dogs! 2) adopt a new dog after we move but before the next year starts pros - dog doesn't have to adjust to 2 places and skips the drive; cons - only ~1 month before I start new job. Both of these options also allow us to work with the dog while she will have our undivided attention (before baby) 3) wait till after the baby is born pros - dog will start with the baby already in the house; cons - I'm guessing we won't have the time or patience to deal with doggy issues and young dog has to wait even longer for new sister
Opinions???
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johnr
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« Reply #1 on: May 12, 2008, 09:11:30 PM » |
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Speaking as someone with three, now long suffering and once beloved, dogs and a new baby, WAIT, FOR GOD'S SAKE, WAIT.
P.S. Is this a joke? Cross country travel, new tt position, new baby...third dog?
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"When I die, I hope it's in a committee meeting. The transition from life to death will be barely perceptible."
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shrimp
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« Reply #2 on: May 12, 2008, 09:30:28 PM » |
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Ouch - definitely not a joke, but we are crazy! I am afraid that if we wait till after the baby is born there won't be a good time to get new dog for years, and it is unlikely that old dog will live until baby arrives anyways so then young dog is completely alone (and he is very much a pack animal). It is really hard to plan for the loss of our oldest but I also worry it would be even harder to get another dog after old dog dies. We can never replace any of our dogs, it is more a matter of making sure that the living dogs are happy. You mention "once beloved dogs", have your feelings towards them changed or do you just not have the same time for them?
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noof_
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« Reply #3 on: May 12, 2008, 10:12:28 PM » |
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I know of a couple who decided to get a third dog just before the baby arrived (in anticipation of the Old Yeller's demise). It nearly ended their marriage.
They hadn't counted on dog #2 not adjusting the loss of Old Yeller, the arrival of a new baby, and an overexcited puppy. Dog #2 developed serious behavioral problems - possessive aggression, urinating in the house, digging, excessive barking (a couple of which are still a problem three years later).
The new pupped ended up at to doggie day care for exercise. They also wanted to be sure the puppy wouldn't get injured by dog #2 or develop the bad habits.
You are a very brave and ambitious person.
Good luck.
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sequoia_sun
code-bearing
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threadualiscious
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« Reply #4 on: May 12, 2008, 10:13:33 PM » |
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One can never have too many dogs, but; one can have too many dogs in the fire.
Wait. I have had from 1-4 to 4-3 to 3-4 to 4-2 to 2-3 to 3-2 and it all works out in the end. I fear you will be so overwhelmed with baby and move and new job that new dog will get neglected. Old dog may last longer than you think, otherwise younger dog will adjust later after new baby, move and new dog.
FWIW
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Greetings, earthlings...
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sequoia_sun
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« Reply #5 on: May 12, 2008, 10:22:12 PM » |
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Then again, I just stayed up an extra hour and a half waiting for my cat to come in for the night.
Sigh.
I hate when he isn't in to sleep with us for the night.
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Greetings, earthlings...
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msparticularity
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« Reply #6 on: May 12, 2008, 11:43:52 PM » |
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And the cat motif raises another possibility - does your dog like cats? If you want a companion for your dog who will not need quite the amount of energy that a new dog would, you might think about getting a kitty. My dog prefers cats - he's a toy Poodle, was a rescue, and is very frightened of big animals - and he finds our cats to be all the company he wants, aside from us.
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"Once admit that the sole verifiable or fruitful object of knowledge is the particular set of changes that generate the object of study...and no intelligible question can be asked about what, by assumption, lies outside." John Dewey
"Be particular." Jill Conner Browne
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ufo_tofu
Soy-based
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Illegitimi non carborundum
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« Reply #7 on: May 13, 2008, 01:35:21 AM » |
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I don't think I'd be brave enough to take even part of that on, but if you're determined, I'd say get the new dog now. Yes, you'll have to do the drive with the new dog but that way you'll have as much time as possible to work out the new dynamic before another addition shows up. Just my $.02 - good luck with whatever you decide! Keep us posted!
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Wash: Don't know. I'm starting to like this poetry thing. "Here lies my beloved Zoe, my autumn flower… somewhat less attractive now that she's all corpsified and gross-" [Zoe hits him with a pillow]
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phdbliss
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« Reply #8 on: May 13, 2008, 07:03:45 AM » |
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Well, you know how much energy and time the normal puppy takes, so you can be prepared for the transition of getting third dog. I have two and can't imagine having a third, but that's just me.
What about babies? Know how much energy and time they take? It's like a puppy x 1000. Maybe even x10000.
And where is your job fitting in here? If it's on the periphery, that's not good.
Think very carefully before you take on anything else.
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scheherazade
1/3 of the Triumvirate of Evil and the Most Delicious
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Running feminist prostitution rings since 1998
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« Reply #9 on: May 13, 2008, 08:40:37 AM » |
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I can see where you're coming from. Another dog will keep younger dog busy. That's good, especially with a new baby coming. You also know that it's going to be very difficult to break in a new dog with a brand new baby.
If you think your younger dog needs another dog, get one now. if you think he'll be fine, wait, but understand that you'll probably be waiting at least a year or two. Having grown up with several dogs and kids around, and having a couple kids and several animals now, I understand that oftentimes adding animals actually subtracts work.
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You historians disturb me sometimes.
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shrimp
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« Reply #10 on: May 14, 2008, 12:50:50 PM » |
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I appreciate everyone's opinions so far - anybody else want to weigh in? By the way, hubby works from home and is very supportive and understanding of my career, so that could help ease the transitions.
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hegemony
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« Reply #11 on: May 14, 2008, 05:46:50 PM » |
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Do not get a new dog now! Do not get a new dog now!
Wait until after the baby is born. The baby will take every ounce of time and energy you have, and more. And if you say, "But then we won't have enough time and energy for a new dog!" -- exactly. If you don't have enough time and energy for a new dog, it will be a good thing not to have a new dog. Remember that you will have the option of getting a new dog at any point you want to from there on out. But wait until you see how much energy you have after the new job and the new baby before you make that decision.
When the time comes, you might think about adopting an adult (but still young and playful) house-trained dog from the Humane Society. They desperately need homes, and that could save you some hair-tearing when you're already overburdened.
Do not travel across country with three dogs. Seriously, you have enough on your plate already.
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Tragedy tomorrow, comedy tonight.
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