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[hiddendragon]

Is there anyone here who has experience taking clomid and did it brought you any success?  What are the side effects that some of you have endured, or witnessed your SO endured?

I've been trying unsuccessfully to conceive for nearly three years and have started taking clomid in the past three months without success thus far.  My doctor says she wants to up the dose, but even with the current lowest dose (50mg), I am terribly depressed and can barely concentrate to get anything done. [And, I need to get things published, but my biological clock is ticking big time and I also need to have a baby before it's too late.  At times, I fear it may already be too late]. Also, my relationship with SO has declined in a major way since I started taking the clomid.  I find myself so cranky around him.  I seem to be more sensitive about how he is around me, too.  This has resulted in us fighting a lot. I don't know if it's the clomid or just the stress of not being successful in conceiving on top of life on the tt track.

I could use some words of advice and other stories about other people's experiences.  I know this is a personal topic, but I am in a new area and don't really have anyone supportive among my live colleagues to air this out to.  I'd appreciate any rational and hopeful voice that'll give me a different perspective.  Do I have any hope of conceiving?  After nearly three years, I'm getting hopeless.

[sequoia_sun]

Wow.

I took Clomid over 20 years ago in my first marriage (he pissed and moaned about the cost after a couple of years, so I left him).

No kids (not mine, he had one with his next wife after me).

Divorced.

Remarried. He has 3 kids from a previous marriage.  Not my kids.  He was adopted as a baby.  We only adopt animals.

It really sucks beyond imagination, trying to have kids for 20+ years with no success.  I guess I wasn't meant to be a breeder.  PM me after 17 more years have gone by.

You must be really young.

[ms_turtle]

A good site to get real world experiences with different medications is askapatient.com

[gennimom]

I've done it several times. I had hot flashes while I was taking it the first couple of times. I almost always took the 50 mg dose. The two months I did the 100 mg, I thought I was going to die. It made me nauseaus and then made me think I WAS pregnant, but was not.

The first time I took it, I got pregnant the second month, but then miscarried. Probably not the fault of the clomid. The second time, my husband became very ill, and it was a wasted attempt. The third time, I took it for 4 months with no success, but my cycle was normal for 4 months straight afterward, at the end of which time, I found out I was pregnant with my daughter. Perfectly normal pregnancy with a healthy baby at the end. I've tried a 4-month round since then, but nothing happened. I was suprised and amazed at the successful pregnancy. I was 38 when I gave birth.

I've known several people who've taken it. One had a baby about the time my first pregnancy should have ended. She is pregnant again, but don't know if clomid had anything to do with it. Another was a niece who miscarried twins very early in the pregnancy. I haven't heard that clomid itself is linked to miscarriages, and mine was probably just one of those things. The niece also has had previous difficulties getting pregnant, but has one child already.  If anybody else knows anything though, I'm willing to be corrected.

[hiddendragon]

Sequoai,

I am NOT young according to how biology goes--over 37 now.  Like other career women, I probably waited too long.  Although my contemporaries and friends, some of who are several years older than I, are having babies left and right.  I guess people have different biology.  Or, I'm just too stressed out with research, teaching, and traveling.

I'm sorry to hear about your lack of success.  I may PM you someday.  But your story about a first divorce does highlight some of my fights with my SO.  He's hinted to me more than once that he does not have to have children with me and that, unlike women, men don't have a biological clock--that he could just find a younger woman.  I guess this adds to my depression.  We both made the choice to delay having children and now he seems to be hinting at moving on to Plan-B.  I feel at a terrible disadvantage.

Thanks for responding.

[hiddendragon]

Ms. turtle,

Thanks for the link, but I'd rather hear from others in academe.  I guess many of us share the common idea of delaying having children while in the long process of obtaining that darn PhD.

A good site to get real world experiences with different medications is askapatient.com

[msparticularity]

I took Clomid for 6-7 months before finally getting pregnant with my daughter 21 years ago. Taking Clomid was absolutely the WORST EVER - it made me crazy: depressed, , anxious, volatile, angry, despairing, and pretty much every other crazy thing you can think of. And yeah, it was probably that on top of a couple of previous years of infertility, which is incredibly stressful. I felt misunderstood by my husband - not supported, and so on. (As it turned out, that was grounded in reality; we were divorced when my daughter was three.)

I don't know anything about Clomid and miscarriages, but I do know that the known rate of miscarriage is 15%, and many experts think it is likely much higher when you factor in very early miscarriage, occurring before the pregnancy is known. And Clomid has been in use for a pretty long time, so if it were associated with a higher rate, I think we'd know about it by now.

Mostly I just want to say good luck and hang in there. Treatment for infertility was the most crazy-making thing I have ever dealt with, and that's going some ;). Once I had my daughter, I pretty much chickened out of ever trying it again, in fact.

[finallyfullprof]

I have not known anyone who had good experiences with it. Either it didn't work or they hyperstimulated. I'm sure my anecdotal results are not typical.

What concerns me more is the fact that your partner seems to be treating you as breeding stock. Are you sure you want to have a child with your husband when he appears to be basing his commitment to you on your fertility? 

And please don't forget there are other options: other methods of ART, surrogacy, fostering, adoption, and living childfree.  You could find what you seek in one of them.

Good luck to you in your decision. I hope everything works out for the best.

[cityprof]

Just curious, hiddendragon, but if you've been trying for 3 years, why not skip ahead to something more intensive than Clomid alone, like Clomid + IUI? Especially if you are over 35, I'm surprised your doc is not being more aggressive. Are you seeing a reproductive endocrinologist, or just working with your ob/gyn? If the latter, you may want to consider an RE, because they tend to move faster and also monitor you more closely when you take Clomid (which would prevent the overstimulation that finallyfullprof talks about).

Sorry to sound bossy. I don't have personal experience with Clomid, just a lot of friends. We have male factor issues and so are going straight to IVF, which is a whole other can of infertile worms.

[edwidge]

I used Clomid to conceive my first child. I don't remember it affecting my mood at all, but it was many years ago. I do know that Clomid becomes increasingly ineffective with each try. With our second kid, the Clomid no longer worked and I had to do IVF. Needless to say, the whole IVF process made the Clomid/insemination route seem like a walk in the park.

Key advice, if you can possibly do it (and you may already be doing this): see a reproductive endocrinologist for a complete workup and your continuing care, rather than a non-specialist. Generally speaking, non-specialists like OB/GYN docs don't really know what they're doing when it comes to infertility.

If you're interested, check out the website for the American Society for Reproductive Medicine (asrm.org), read up about Clomid, and look for a qualified reproductive endocrinologist in your area.

Good luck!

[hiddendragon]

Cityprof,

Part of the lack in aggressive treatment is my fault--on the job market, conference travels, research travels.  Hence, I could not schedule appointments that fit into the whole scheme.  This past year is the first year that I am in one place for more than three months.  So, the first year, I did the temperature thing.  After that, went to see the ob and had the physical work out and lab work out.  The doctor told me to wait three months to see if the hysteropingpogram (I can't even spell this word) had any effect of opening of my fallopian tubes (in case they had gotten narrower over the years).  After that, another appointment finally to start the clomid.  And, it's been nearly three years.  Yes, time flies.

My OB says she wants to up the does for three more months and then after that she'll send me to a fertility specialist.  I now wonder if I should just skip the process to an RE.  I am not getting younger by the month.  But my OB is a good doctor and I want to follow her advise.

My concern also is that IVF is terribly expensive and I don't think I can afford it at this stage in my life.  I may have to take another loan on top of my many other loans.

Just curious, hiddendragon, but if you've been trying for 3 years, why not skip ahead to something more intensive than Clomid alone, like Clomid + IUI? Especially if you are over 35, I'm surprised your doc is not being more aggressive. Are you seeing a reproductive endocrinologist, or just working with your ob/gyn? If the latter, you may want to consider an RE, because they tend to move faster and also monitor you more closely when you take Clomid (which would prevent the overstimulation that finallyfullprof talks about).

Sorry to sound bossy. I don't have personal experience with Clomid, just a lot of friends. We have male factor issues and so are going straight to IVF, which is a whole other can of infertile worms.

[sequoia_sun]

Sequoai,

I am NOT young according to how biology goes--over 37 now.  Like other career women, I probably waited too long.  Although my contemporaries and friends, some of who are several years older than I, are having babies left and right.  I guess people have different biology.  Or, I'm just too stressed out with research, teaching, and traveling.

I'm sorry to hear about your lack of success.  I may PM you someday.  But your story about a first divorce does highlight some of my fights with my SO.  He's hinted to me more than once that he does not have to have children with me and that, unlike women, men don't have a biological clock--that he could just find a younger woman.  I guess this adds to my depression.  We both made the choice to delay having children and now he seems to be hinting at moving on to Plan-B.  I feel at a terrible disadvantage.

Thanks for responding.

Sorry for sounding so rude! I guess I am bitter in many ways, given my scenario.  My first partner (husband of 10 years) said he didn't care if he had kids (notice the emphasis on he, not we). Until after we were divorced and he had one with his next wife. Then it was the best thing since sliced bread. Until she left him for cheating on her. With me.  Bastard. I hope he is always unhappy.

At any rate, he was the ambivalent one. And when it cost us money to conceive (my insurance wouldn't pay anymore), he wanted to bail. So we did. And I moved on. I guess it is easier for some men to have children when all they have to do is have sex with their partner. For some guys, if it costs them time or money (this case), it isn't worth their time.

I am 45 now and will definitely not have any biological kids of my own(much to my [and my mom's] dismay).  I have always resented how easy it is for others to have kids, and how much society takes it for granted and how much pressure there is for women to conceive and how if we don't we are truly defective.  Unless you have been there, you have no clue how it feels.  Hiddendragon, it seems like you do know how it feels.

I truly am feeling defective these days, so I apologize if my snarkiness leaked over to you. PM me anytime you like.

[chi_square]

I’ve been on Clomid and didn’t have the side effects that you mentioned, although they are quite common. Clomid can be quite effective but from what I have been told, if it doesn’t work within 6 months, the success rate using Clomid is quite low. The advantage is that it is relatively cheap, compared to the other ART treatments, so my experience is that 6 months on Clomid, like your doctor seems to be suggesting, is pretty standard.

Unfortunately, Clomid didn’t work for me and I had to go the IVF route. In a way, your age could be an advantage in that they might suggest more aggressive treatment sooner. I was 32 when I started consulting with doctors and quite petite, so they stepped me up through the process gradually with less invasive procedures and lower medication dosages. This ended up taking much longer and a lot of money. It took about 2 years from when I started infertility treatments to my first IVF, which thankfully was successful and my daughter is 3 months old today.

Since you want an academic perspective, it was very hard to manage all of the appointments necessary to go through treatment. At first, I thought that the Clomid appointments were difficult to schedule and I only needed one per cycle for that. With the other types of ART treatments, I would have 3 or more appointments per cycle, and sometimes I wouldn’t know that I had to go into the doctor’s office until the day before. And they can’t be rescheduled. Since the fertility clinic was an hour away, it was challenging. What saved me was not having any classes before 11am. So, if you have a choice of when to schedule your classes, you might consider that if you go forward with other types of treatment.

It is interesting how my perspectives changed over the course of the treatment. In the beginning, I was so careful in trying to time it around holidays and the summer break. In the end, I wasn’t rescheduling around anything, including my sister’s wedding and a job search. In the end, I ended up getting pregnant at the worst possible time and it still worked out.

The best of luck as you consider your options

[wiley]

Hiddendragon,
My wife was on clomid for two cycles, but we stopped because of some nonrelated life issues. We didn't notice any mood/behavior changes in her during that time.

We have changed to a better doctor / facility that is more empathic and forthcoming with information about alternatives. Now we are on our second cycle of injectible meds followed by an IUI.

Talk to your doctor and make sure you're taking the right approach.

Good luck!

[sciprofmw]

My current SO's ex took clomid.  It worked, they had 2 children together, however her behavior was so extreme and berating to my SO that it broke the relationship.  To this day my SO blames it on the clomid - convienient excuse or real??? I don't know, but others have said she was a different person pre-clomid.