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[prytania3]

I'm off to go take a long walk.  My whole lower half has been aching and I've come to the conclusion it's from lack of exercise.  Also, I figured out this summer that I have poor leg circulation--fun, no?  So I have to get that heart pumping.  (Man, I hate to exercise--or at least, until I've been doing it for about twenty minutes.)  ARGH!

Get a bicycle and join us on the cycling thread.

[gourmetless]

My whole lower half has been aching and I've come to the conclusion it's from lack of exercise.  Also, I figured out this summer that I have poor leg circulation--fun, no?  So I have to get that heart pumping.  (Man, I hate to exercise--or at least, until I've been doing it for about twenty minutes.)  ARGH!

Dude, I will sound like a broken record (interthreaduality) but try water aerobics.  Easier on the joints, warms up the muscles, gets your heart pumping, helps with balance issues/achiness.  I started in May and LOVE it.  It has made such a huge difference!!!!

After all, how much fun is it to read (or write) the same thing over and over: "My joints are swollen and hurt, and most of the time I'm feeling like I'm coming down with the flu." In other words, yeah - I've got RA and I'm having a flare :(

One of the things I think gets the most discouraging about chronic illness is how SLOW the d@mned thing is to respond! I've been taking good care of myself for a whole two weeks and I want to feel better NOW! Just a little demanding, you know ;).

[/quote]

I know what you mean.  My SO knows when I talk about being achy or energy-less, it must be bad since I normally don't say much.  And he is very good about taking care of me (when he is here or I there), making me go to bed, and doing things for me that hurt to do.  But it does plain ole suck to sound like a broken record.  What is the old military saying "Situation Normal, all f***ed up"?

When you know this is how it goes, that this is the norm, it can be mighty discouraging.  Find what is good about life to enjoy.  Being discouraged is no way to go about becoming better.

I am definitely of the glass half-full mentality, which I think helps manage the illnesses.  The SO says there are three types of people, the ones who see the glass as half full, the ones who see it as half empty, and the ones who see the big honking crack in the side of the glass that is leaking the contents all over your foot.  There are days when I get down (okay, weeks, months even), but I always try to see the positives.

I live in an area that has extremes.  Snow belt, cold temps, and then hot and humid periodically in the summers.  Lots of rain.  I think the heat is easier to bear physically, but psychically prefer the winter.

Be well all, eat right, and take a nap.

[lenniel]

Hi all!


I hope that the flares get to be less, as the weather evens out (if it does) for you both, gourmetless and ms.P, and I hope the stress backs off a little to give you some room to breathe and relax, ms.turtle.  How are you doing, rubygirl?  Feelling less overwhelmed?  Taking time to be quiet when needed?  Some for you, ohcanada and ms. trampled?

In reading everyone's thoughts, I realized that we all feel like whiners and repetitive because our illnesses are thus.  There is no progression or much change when one is in the mid-stages of anything, and even though we can improve things such as pain, depression, or quality of life, the underlying cause will remain there and we much be ever vigilant.

I'm an optimist by nature, but I find my need to be upbeat and my own cheerleader is extremely tiring.  People will ask me how I am, and I generally don't want to tell them, so I have several short answers, lie, or deflect.  To explain sounds like whining, and some days I feel tip-top.  The SO has to put up with me the most, poor man, and it is mostly the super-PMS.  Thankfully, he has a thick skin and will ignore me if necessary.  There are times when I can't even stand myself.

Explaining a chronic condition to someone who doesn't have one is never easy, and our society has an expectation that we will simply get over it and be better.  When the illness is not too visible, it is even harder, and society, again, dictates that we not be slackers or subject to pity.  It makes for a very thin line in dealing with colleagues, friends and even family.  I love my family, but there is much they don't know.  Oddly, I find that on occasion my denial is helpful, and if I focus on other people, it helps.  There are a lot of people out there far worse than I am.  I do suffer from depression, I'm an alcoholic, and I have a serious chronic disease.  It's not fair, but I know what to do for all that ails me, and if I just do that, I will be fine.  Or at least able to get to the next day and start over.  I'm not in chronic pain and I can leave my house without fear or anxiety - I think I am pretty lucky, actually.  I still have my days, but I'm a flawed human as well.

We should be able to whine and complain, as sometimes that snaps us out of it.  If we knew we would be fixed, we would see the light at the end of the tunnel, but there is often no such thing.  So, we have to avoid the tunnel and stay on the mountain. 

Hope everyone takes care today!

[rubygirl]

Thanks, all, for your exercise thoughts and inquiries (water aerobics--never thought of that!  I'll investigate).  I did take a 30-minute walk yesterday (I figured out that if I make it to 20 minutes I can usually go longer, and that's long enough to make me feel good).  I pretty much just kept saying "heart-pumping, heart-pumping" over and over, to remind myself why I was doing it and to make sure I didn't stop.  But I sure was ready to stop when I did.

I felt pretty good all the rest of the day.

Things are starting to ratchet up in my neck of the woods, and I spent the first half of today revved up and getting a bit anxious about trying to get everything done.  I was actually PRODUCING anxiety where I didn't have any cause!  Jeez.  I finally figured out what I was doing and settled down, but then I heard some really bad news that was very upsetting, and I've been able to dismiss it only periodically.  Then it comes back.

I did, however, eat very well today.  And I will walk again tomorrow.  And I won't stay up past my bedtime tonight.  Promise.

Lenniel, I appreciate your words of wisdom.  They give me strength.

Love and rest to all!

[cyano]

Ups and downs. I'm back on steroids and I feel fantastic. I even ate clam chowder with milk in it today. I wish I could stay on steroids without any risks such as osteoporosis. I feel great and have been running and hiking and enjoying the summer. I'm supposed to taper off again in a month just when school starts. Uh oh!

[msparticularity]

Explaining a chronic condition to someone who doesn't have one is never easy, and our society has an expectation that we will simply get over it and be better.  When the illness is not too visible, it is even harder, and society, again, dictates that we not be slackers or subject to pity.  It makes for a very thin line in dealing with colleagues, friends and even family. 

Lenniel, I think this is SO true - you have really articulated the issues well. I'm actually beginning to climb back up out of the biggest dip (I hope!), but even a little thing like a single night of poor sleep is still enough to make me feel pretty wretched, and my joints are still swollen. Trying to explain to people, "Well, yes, I am feeling much better, but I have to really guard against taking on too much in case it overloads me" just feels so illegitimate - and I think that's a product of the societal expectations you're talking about. And, as you say, so much of what goes on is invisible to others, so we end up feeling like whiners and malingerers.

Cyano, I'm glad to hear you're feeling so well - and I totally identify with the mixed relationship with steroids! I don't actually tolerate them well - I get headaches and all the other good stuff - but they unquestionably help with all kinds of inflammation.

And Rubygirl, I'm with you on the exercise, and also the self-induced anxiety. I spent a couple of days obsessing about my syllabi, so I'm really focused on them for a couple of days so I can move on to worrying about something else ;)

 

[spork]

Not strictly an on-thread topic, but how does one deal with a girlfriend/boyfriend/spouse/partner/whatever who ignores advice that is based on your own experience?  For example, from "it could be an infection, you should see a physician" to "you're showing signs of an infection, have you tried to schedule an appointment with a physician?" to finally "you need to see a physician now, as in TODAY, or just go to the ER, by ambulance if you have to."

[msparticularity]

Not strictly an on-thread topic, but how does one deal with a girlfriend/boyfriend/spouse/partner/whatever who ignores advice that is based on your own experience?  For example, from "it could be an infection, you should see a physician" to "you're showing signs of an infection, have you tried to schedule an appointment with a physician?" to finally "you need to see a physician now, as in TODAY, or just go to the ER, by ambulance if you have to."

What, we're not going to talk about lesbians or thongs? ;)

Seriously, there are definitely people who seem determined to completely ignore their own medical problems - an amazing amount of denial in some cases. It seems to be at the extreme other end of the spectrum from hypochondriacs; instead of worrying obsessively over every little thing, they seem impervious to everything until and unless they collapse into unconsciousness or worse. My ex was like this - by the time he admitted to a problem it was usually time to schedule surgery.

Unfortunately, with some of these types nothing anyone else says makes any impression at all until something major (heart attack, complete incapacitation) catches their attention. Even then, IMHO, you're fighting a battle against whatever ingrained dysfunction has left them so numbed to their own body's experience.

[lenniel]

Not strictly an on-thread topic, but how does one deal with a girlfriend/boyfriend/spouse/partner/whatever who ignores advice that is based on your own experience?  For example, from "it could be an infection, you should see a physician" to "you're showing signs of an infection, have you tried to schedule an appointment with a physician?" to finally "you need to see a physician now, as in TODAY, or just go to the ER, by ambulance if you have to."

What, we're not going to talk about lesbians or thongs? ;)

Seriously, there are definitely people who seem determined to completely ignore their own medical problems - an amazing amount of denial in some cases. It seems to be at the extreme other end of the spectrum from hypochondriacs; instead of worrying obsessively over every little thing, they seem impervious to everything until and unless they collapse into unconsciousness or worse. My ex was like this - by the time he admitted to a problem it was usually time to schedule surgery.

Unfortunately, with some of these types nothing anyone else says makes any impression at all until something major (heart attack, complete incapacitation) catches their attention. Even then, IMHO, you're fighting a battle against whatever ingrained dysfunction has left them so numbed to their own body's experience.

I concur, and have had the experience of trying to convince someone they should go to hospital ASAP, and have them not listen.  They wind up even more embarrassed by collapsing, riding in an ambulance, or having the doctor yell at them and hopefully not do it again.  Sometimes you have to either let them be an a$$ and suffer the above, or simply shove them in the car.  Threats of doing same, plus lurid descriptions of pus, brain damage and so forth can sometimes help.  Guilt is also a good motivator, with variations on the "who will take care of the kids/dogs/cats/mom/etc. when you die of stupidity" theme always a good one.

That being said, I have been hauled off to the docs many a time because I didn't think I was that ill (my family felt doctors were for special occasions, like a limb falling off) and have since learned to recognize the difference between merely sick and something serious.  Oddly, I really didn't know this, as ms.p suggests, and wasn't trying to be a pain, just didn't see it.  This may be the case in the situation you suggest as well.  The above scheme still works - they will be motivated to learn to take care of themselves if there is more at stake than themselves.

[msparticularity]

That being said, I have been hauled off to the docs many a time because I didn't think I was that ill (my family felt doctors were for special occasions, like a limb falling off) and have since learned to recognize the difference between merely sick and something serious.  Oddly, I really didn't know this, as ms.p suggests, and wasn't trying to be a pain, just didn't see it. 

Yeah, I agree that a whole lot of family dynamics can get in the way of reasonable self-care. After all, we spend the formative years of our lives absorbing family messages about health (don't make a fuss; don't put your own interests ahead of others'; it's just a bump and you shouldn't be a crybaby) so it's really hard work to re-write a lot of this into something more workable.

But yeah, Spork, I think sometimes it is time to get right in someone else's face and point some of this out.

[lenniel]

That being said, I have been hauled off to the docs many a time because I didn't think I was that ill (my family felt doctors were for special occasions, like a limb falling off) and have since learned to recognize the difference between merely sick and something serious.  Oddly, I really didn't know this, as ms.p suggests, and wasn't trying to be a pain, just didn't see it. 

Yeah, I agree that a whole lot of family dynamics can get in the way of reasonable self-care. After all, we spend the formative years of our lives absorbing family messages about health (don't make a fuss; don't put your own interests ahead of others'; it's just a bump and you shouldn't be a crybaby) so it's really hard work to re-write a lot of this into something more workable.

But yeah, Spork, I think sometimes it is time to get right in someone else's face and point some of this out.

So true!  I often wonder if that is how I managed to go for so long feeling vaguely unhealthy, but not doing anything about it.  Not that it would have changed anything, but I might have gotten better treatment, sooner and spared myself a lot of wasted time in discomfort.

I'm glad you are feeling better, Ms.P, and also glad the treatments are working, cyano!  May everything continue to work well!

How is the anxiety, rubygirl?  Exercise is a great way to let it out, and I try to get some every day, no matter how little.  I like to run and bike, but when my energy - or time - is not permitting, I take at least a 20 min walk.  Always helps, and I find it helps me work out problems in my research as well.  Whenever I can't figure out what to do with something, I "walk it out" and it always works.

How are you doing, ms.turtle?  Hope everyone is taking care and being gentle today!

[ms_turtle]

How are you doing, ms.turtle?  Hope everyone is taking care and being gentle today!

Sleeping more than is decent. Not good.

[gourmetless]

Sorry to hear that, Ms_T!!  Sometimes the body does do a shut-down.  Hope you get caught mentally and physically, soon.

I had a crash/flare yesterday, for no particular reason that I could see.  So much muscle pain and absolutely no energy.  I got up, had breakfast, then had to lay back down.  Took a shower, laid down.  Halfway got dressed, took a break, then finished dressing.  Laid down again.  Finally decided to just stay put.  Classes do not start here for a few weeks (we are late), so I felt I could take this day, stay in bed and read and sleep.  I sleep yesterday for at least 12 hours.

I feel somewhat better today, but decided to NOT work-out.  I really want to be able to enjoy my last free weekend, and so am taking it easy.

Happy Weekending Everyone!  Treat yourself nicely.

[lenniel]

Hang in there, msT and if you need to sleep, maybe your body is just going for it.  I hope things get better soon!

Glad you are taking it easy, gourmetless, and hopefully a quiet weekend will help.  School doesn't start for us until after Labor Day, so I have another few weeks of flexibility and some travel before the weirdness begins anew.

Take care, everyone, and have a good, restful weekend!

[rubygirl]

How is the anxiety, rubygirl?  Exercise is a great way to let it out, and I try to get some every day, no matter how little.  I like to run and bike, but when my energy - or time - is not permitting, I take at least a 20 min walk.  Always helps, and I find it helps me work out problems in my research as well.  Whenever I can't figure out what to do with something, I "walk it out" and it always works.

Thanks for asking, Lenniel.  I'm doing REALLY well the last few days (yay!).  Let me tell you, that 20-minute walk is a lifesaver.  It gets the kinks out.

I just wanted to check in and encourage everyone.  I've been outside a lot the last few days, and the weather has been sunny and warm with a breeze.  I've sweated but it's been good sweating, and I've done a lot of walking.  I feel very calm.  I do need more sleep, but I get to sleep tonight.

MS_T, am thinking about you.  Same for you, gourmetless.  Please take good care of yourselves.

Love to everyone.