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Author Topic: Color blind  (Read 5579 times)
danny_boy
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« Reply #60 on: March 10, 2008, 12:12:33 PM »

OK... you win... I'm not going to continue this pointless back and forth with you.. no matter which of your many names you use.

I think I was just bothered by the way your OP frames this all as "hubby's problem."  It's not.  It's culture (male/female as well as US/Brit) as well as personal aesthetics.  So it's just as much your problem as his.  I'm also bothered by the broad way that you've been using "color blindness." 
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hegemony
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« Reply #61 on: March 10, 2008, 10:13:41 PM »

What's I'm noticing is an underlying tone of contempt and dismissiveness, and score-keeping.  The music on the walls vs. the books in storage; the complaining about the house without any constructiveness: there are low-level but continuing niggling issues going on here.  I think that's probably a pretty draining way to have a relationship.  That's why I have a sense that there are bigger issues.  And even if he favors ridiculous colors, he still favors them.  If people like Pat Boone records, or kitsch figurines, or '70s brown suits, they may seem ridiculous to others, but their choices still matter to them.  I'd argue that we need to take their choices as seriously as choices we ourselves approved of, if we're in a relationship with them.  Otherwise it's just condescending.  Thinking we know better or have superior taste can come across as disrespectful and adversarial, and things start to go downhill.  BTDT.
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Tragedy tomorrow, comedy tonight.
oldadjunct
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LIFO. Enough said.


« Reply #62 on: March 10, 2008, 10:32:34 PM »

Which is more odd: a private disagreement about color, or a public disagreement about a private disagreement about color?

Ok, kiddies, back to your nap mats.
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Everyone is entitled to his own opinion, but not his own facts.
Daniel Patrick Moynihan

Fiction is baseball; Rhetoric is football.
expatinuk
Has spent over 1000 pounds but now holds a Brit passport!
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From SC living in UK


WWW
« Reply #63 on: March 11, 2008, 02:11:41 AM »

Well... there's actually NO disagreement about color here in the expatinuk/Hubby Bubba household. There's just a disagreement about a perception of color.

The decorator visited yesterday and he and I selected three colors to go on the walls. Hubby Bubba loved the colors selected. Why? because they were on a card that had the word ORANGE written at the top.

Hubba Bubba really can't distinguish between many colors. As Wild Rose knows, someone with the kind of color blindness that Hubby Bubba has only sees 'in your face' bright colors. His friends still tease him about a yellow shirt he loved... 35 years ago.

And hegemony... there's not a tone of contempt for the things he likes. He likes music... lots of music... and he likes to have his music displayed. For Christmas I had music storage built for him in the chimney breast in his study. That's where he wanted the music. We both have a lot of things in storage. That's pretty common when you combine houses.

Of course there's lots of back and forthing over silly petty issues... that's also normal in marriage. Just as right now I'm totally annoyed that he's given me his cold... wasn't that sweet of him? We suffer through colds in different ways. His is in his head... and mine is in my chest...and kidneys. So for the next few days.. he'll be sneezing... and I'll be coughing... and peeing...
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Expatinuk seems to be a Soviet Satellite in stationary orbit over the UK

It is what it is.
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