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[expatinuk]

OK, Hubby Bubba is colorblind. I don't mean the 'My husband is colorblind.' I mean he REALLY is colorblind. He still gets 'huffy' when I tell him, 'You can't wear that with that.' But he has started to ask me 'Which tie?' as he brings in a selection for me to choose from. This usually means that he has an important meeting and doesn't want to look like an idiot.

But, now we're in crisis mode here in the Village. As many of you know from reading these boards, Hubby Bubba sold his town house and has moved in to the Country house full time. Now he says he HATES THIS HOUSE. There is no logical reason for him to hate this house... but, as we know, a spouse isn't always logical. There are many reasons why I'm not willing to move to another house (the main one being the insane condition of the Brit housing market).

This isn't the crisis....  but... this is... In order to make Hubby Bubba more comfortable here in the house he hates I've said that he can choose the paint color for his study. Oh, one of the things he HATES about this house, is that I've painted all the walls cream. He HATES cream.

So... colorblind Hubby Bubba has chosen the most AWFUL color for the walls in his study.... I mean really really awful... think baby poop yellow brown.... It doesn't 'go' with anything in the house. I've tried all sorts of strategies... suggesting that we use that as an accent color... but NO he wants ALL THE WALLS painted baby poop yellow.

You ask... why should I care... it's his study... I can shut the door. Well.. NO I CAN'T... the house is open plan (yet another reason he HATES THIS HOUSE.. he likes tiny rooms that can be shut off)... so from the living room you will see the BABY POOP YELLOW walls... which... by the way totally CLASH with the orange oriental (Sarouk) rug I bought him for the room. Orange is his FAVORITE color... and like an idiot I assumed that he'd want to paint the walls a russet or terracotta shade. But NO ... he wants BABY POOP YELLOW.

So... do I go back on my word... and actually NOT paint the walls the color he picked?

[santommaso]

This is a joke, right? It was a funny story.

My wife let me paint my office any color I wanted. I would recommend letting the chosen paint flow.

[qrypt]

Paint the walls the color he is after, and then repaint them something less awful when he's away for a day or two.  If he's really and truly colorblind, he won't notice. 

[secretweapon]

Buy some screens or curtains to section off his study.

[zelter]

I am color blind and can tell you that when I see a color I like, it is important to me- let him have the color.

[danny_boy]

Color blindness is NOT one condition:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Color_blindness

[expatinuk]

Hey... he thinks the color is Orange... he LIKES Orange. I can live with some shades of Orange... but this isn't Orange.

Even the men who have seen the color test on the walls say: That's a terrible color.

[babbinacara]

Buy a smallish can of Baby Poop Yellow and paint one wall (preferably a wall that you can't see from the living room). Ask him if he still likes it on a larger scale. Poll everyone who comes in the door on whether they like it or whether it reminds them of baby poop (invite in your postman, Jehovah's witnesses, anyone who turns up on the doorstep). Then negotiate.

[expatinuk]

I've painted a HUGE test piece of the baby poop color on the wall... because... frankly it didn't look THAT bad on the paint swatch. But on the wall... JEEZ...

I'm thinking that I'll get the painter to talk him out of it. The painter talked him out of the blue kitchen in the town house. After the kitchen was painted yellow Hubby Bubba kept saying... wow... this looks so much brighter

Like duh... yellow IS brighter than blue...

I keep hearing from the men... let's hear from some women here...

Of course all my female friends are amused because they've never heard of a man kicking up a fuss over a color.

And what's even funnier... if you ASKED Hubby Bubba he'd insist that he doesn't care about the color of things because color just doesn't register with him.

[danny_boy]

Hey... he thinks the color is Orange... he LIKES Orange. I can live with some shades of Orange... but this isn't Orange.

Are you saying he can SEE Orange?   In what sense is hubby "color-blind" -- in most cases color blindness involves selective color confusion.  Only a very miniscule percent are completely unable to see any color, i.e. perceive the world only as greys.  If your husband can see Orange then he doesn't fall into this category.

So, are we just talking about a folk sense for color blind as when people claim that they're "tone deaf" just because they've never learned to carry a tune?  In this way, many women might claim that men are "color-blind."  Studies in semantics certainly show that men (in a range of cultures) tend to have a reduced color vocabulary relative to women in those cultures.  I, for one, have no idea whatsoever what color puce is.

So YOU see "baby poop yellow" and your husband sees "orange."  What's so strange about that.  My Mexican wife regularly sees green things when I point out some yellow thing.  Color vocabulary is notoriously flexible across culture and gender lines.

So is your husband's color blindness a medical condition?  If so, what type?  In the US this might, for example, prevent one from getting a driver's license.  Or are you just talking about a (learned) inability to distinguish similar colors.

As far as yellow being brighter than blue that depends on the receiving device.  In the case of WWI era photos blues record lighter on film and yellows (and reds) could be almost black due to the orthochromatic film used at that time.  So who's to say that blue (which blue anyway) is darker than yellow (which yellow).

[francie_]

Color blindness is NOT one condition:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Color_blindness

But so?  It doesn't really matter what type of color blindness Hubby Bubba has.  His color perception is far different from Expat's, and that is what is causing the problem.

Expat, are you sure the wrangling is just about color?  It seems like this is also a territorial battle.  Can HB's study be moved to a different location in the house?  Or, can you reorganize the current space a bit, perhaps by installing floor-to-ceiling bookcases or large, framed pictures to minimize the visual impact of his color choices?  I think at the very least the orange rug needs to go.  Find one that better coordinates with baby-poop yellow.

[danny_boy]

But so?  It doesn't really matter what type of color blindness Hubby Bubba has.  His color perception is far different from Expat's, and that is what is causing the problem.

If that's all it is, and Expat's in "crisis mode" then she's wildly overreacting.  People disagree on color and everything else.  Live with it.  My wife and I have significantly different aethetic senses.  We just have to live with this.  It's never going to go away.  Occasionally we agree but more often than not we think each other's choices look terrible.

[expatinuk]

First of all... yes, it is a 'power' thing. He's determined not to like ANYTHING about this house no matter what.

The orange rug isn't going... it's an antique Sarouk rug that's worth ... hmm... let's just say that it's worth a lot of money and has been in my family for years. I *could* install bookcases so that the room couldn't be seen... but then you couldn't get in the room. *laugh*.

I can't move his study to another room because he's got an antique desk that was his fathers and it won't fit anywhere but that room. In fact that used to be my study... but I've moved upstairs in the 'box' room. Brit houses aren't that big and we're actually pretty lucky to have a study that isn't just a bedroom with a desk in it. The 'box' room is the third bedroom and is really quite tiny.

Right now I'm just plain sick of the moaning and the pouting. There's a thing such as compromise... and frankly we're going to have to compromise on the color. I'm going to bring home a color sample of different shades of russet/orange and he'll just have to pick from that.

Please understand... I HATE orange... but it's a compromise on my part to have the room orange...

[danny_boy]

...and frankly we're going to have to compromise on the color.

I found that in my marriage compromise in practice means "you get to win this one and I'll get to win some of the other ones." 

[science_expat]

ExPat, I think you dug this hole and will have to live with it. Or at best, get him to agree that the wall most visible from the rest of the house will be a different color.

Sorry.