next »

[slac_vap]

Hi all,

I'll be traveling to a conference this spring with husband and baby in tow.  I've never travelled with a baby before.  He will be 9 months old at the time of the conference.  He's a good baby but active.  We are trying to decide between a seven hour car trip or a flight with one connection to the conference destination.  Can anyone with experience in this department give us some advice?  Should we drive or fly?  If we fly, should we spend the extra money to get Junior his own seat, or save money and keep him on our laps?  Any other tips?

Thanks!
slac_vap

[crazybatlady]

Fly.

You're still breastfeeding, right?  If so, you might end up with him on your lap the whole trip anyway, so he may not need his own seat.

Then, when you get to the connecting airport, let him crawl around as much as possible (yes, on the ground.  I know.)  It's likely he'll sleep on at least one leg of the flight anyway, but you'll want to let him wear himself out a bit when he can.

cbl

[crazybatlady]

Also, don't freak out if he fusses or cries a bit, even though you may feel embarrassed and want him quiet.

When he cries, it helps to clear the pressure in his ears.

[sappho]

If you fly, don't bother paying for his own seat.  He'll be all over you anyway.  Also, you might be able to sit in a row of three seats without any other passengers, and thus get a "free" seat anyway.  Make sure that the car seat that you bring is approved for airplanes (I think most are) in case they check, and to be safer.

If you decide to fly, you might have to rent a car once you get there ...

[tamiam]

You know, if it's a 7 hour drive it's probably only about 1.5 hours in the air. But if you have a connection, plus needing to be at the airport early, the time you save by flying might not be too substantial. Taking into consideration the increased cost of your spouse's ticket, the hassle factor of waiting in lines etc., the need to rent a car at your destination...

I think I'd try driving if I were you. It'll wind up being more than 7 hours, of course, but you can bring more things to amuse the ankle-biter and have more control over your environment. It's not a particularly easy age for travel, as I recall. Time your departure for morning nap time, take a nice lunch break, and pray for a nice long afternoon nap. Get one of those annoying little light up bears; give it to him for the first time in the car and it'll keep him busy for a little while.

If one of you isn't going to be in the back seat with the child, I suggest bringing along a set of kitchen tongs so that you can retrive objects from the front seat.

I drove all the way 'cross country and back with a 2 and 5 year old; then did it again 2 more times. This is the voice of experience.

[slac_vap]

Thanks for the replies.  There seems to be some disagreement, but I do appreciate the viewpoints.  I'm getting the feeling that whatever we decide, we will need to be flexible and allow extra time, and I will probably have to let go of my hope that he will be "perfect baby" the whole time.  I do worry that tamiam is right and it just happens to be a particularly difficult traveling age.  I appreciate the practical suggestions from all (kitchen tongs! aahh, the voice of experience).

If we do decide to fly, we probably won't spring for the extra seat.  It sounds right that he will be on me anyway.  Thanks for the tips!

[graine]

One of the tricks, when not booking a seat for your infant, is to pre-book a window and an aisle (assuming a 3-seat row) for you and your travelling partner. The middle ones are always the last to go which gives you a higher chance of an empty seat. If someone is seated between you, they are usually more than happy to switch to either the aisle or window and let you, partner and baby sit together.

[mrhistory]

Oh, and *please* if you book the aisle and window seats planning on the middle going vacant and it doesn't....*do* offer to exchange one of the seats with the poor middle seat passenger.

My last flight was overbooked and I was stuck in a middle seat with an angry couple with a baby (of 14 months...so he was quite active and mobile and awake).  There was no place to move anyone but I got treated to four hours of their anger.  Neither would change seats even when the flight attendant trying to serve the "snack" suggested it. She got a "lecture" on how the airline should leave those seats open!  I got the kid crawling on me, lifted across me constantly by the seated parents and...a big smear of mashed cookies on my sweater.  BTW, no apology just a sneered "oh, for god's sake it will wash out, he's just a baby!" from the rude father of the duo. BTW, I know and have a child. I had simply taken my napkin and was pulling the mashed cookie out of the sweater threads and neither looked at them or said anything. My cleaning gesture apparently provoked the "father of the year" to my left...


Certainly fly and *hope* to have the middle seat free (I've done it in my time!) but if it isn't? Please trade one seat with the hapless victim of the airlines because an infant or toddler is tough to travel with at best and those of us not related to him (or you) might not be enjoying the experience from the "middle" of the relationship.


(Oh, and the kicker? I was en route to a job interview so "business" casual turned into smeary sleeved sweater and khaki pants with a big dark shoe mark on one thigh fromn repeated kicking. The bruise on that leg was a beauty too)

[expatinuk]

I fly a LOT... please please please pay for a seat for your kid.

It doesn't matter if he's in your lap a lot of the time, it will save the sanity of the passenger who paid for a seat and has to put up with your kid throwing up on her.

[modmaven]

When my 2d kid was two months old I took her to England with me for a conference. There is an inverse relation between the age of a person and the amount of luggage required -- so she and I had about eight items of luggage between us, even though I left the car seat at home.  (yeah, really.)  It was crazy getting through customs and ticket counters and trains stations and all, but thanks to technology (fabric) that allows baby to be strapped to mommy we managed  (Baby Bjorn).   We flew Virgin Airlines, which is so baby-friendly that they have little drop down beds on the bulk-head rows for baby to sleep in.  Still, I held her all night long.

Tamiam is right that there's is so much to carry with a babe that driving might be better.  And with the time of connecting and all it might be just as fast to fly.

But if you decide to fly and are still nursing, take note:  babies cry during take off and landing because their little ear drums are killing them.  Nurse the baby then!  This greatly relieves pressure on the ear drums.  That bit of wisdom saved us through many trips.

[relocated_southerner]

My little one flew before 3 months old and had flown about 15-20 times by age 2.  This is what I learned.

1.  If you are flying less than 90 min., you don't need a second seat.  If you are flying for any longer than that, GET ANOTHER SEAT.

2.  Invest in a Sit N Stroll.  It is a bit more expensive than either a stroller or car seat, but it is such a life saver.  We use this as our car seat all of the time.
http://www.amazon.com/Sit-Stroll-Midnight-Blue-Sunshade/dp/B000HKVXX6

3.  Do not assume that the plane will have a diaper changing station, power outlet for a breast pump, or anything to make your life easier.  Ask the gate attendants before boarding if these exist so you know if you need to take care of these things immediately before getting on the plane.

4.  Get on the plane when all of the "special needs" folks do.  Your baby is the ticket in.  If you are on Southwest, this is really good as you get to board first.

5.  Let everyone else get off of the plane before your do so that the baby doesn't slow the whole thing down.

6.  The carry-on needs 2 changes of baby clothes and at least 1 change of clothes for you.  Count on it.

7.  Pack about 3 diapers in the diaper bag at your feet and 5 more in the carry on overhead.

8.  Buy a new toy to put in the diaper bag to play with on the flight.  The novelty will amuse the baby for at least 20 min. of the trip.

9.  If you do get a seat for the baby, please remember that the baby wants to be with you in your lap more than the seat, and let this happen whenever possible.

10.  Get a bottle, pacifier, or breast feed during take-offs and landings to ease the ear pain.

11.  Some folks give their baby's Benedril to make them sleep.  I've never done this, but I packed it every time just in case I need the wee one becomes uncontrollable.

12.  Get there early.  Check in online if possible.  Check as many items as you possibly can. 

13.  For the airport, you should have your diaper bag packed into your carry on; however, you should take it out once you get in the plane.  If you are traveling alone with the wee one, then try to get a backpack carry on instead of a pull behind as it is hard to push the stroller (or sit n stroll) and also pull the carry on through the airport.

14.  If you bottle feed, pack at least 4 bottles with formula (no water) and 2 extra packs of pre-measured formula in little separate bags to add back into a bottle if needed.

15.  Get a bulk-head seat if possible so the baby can play at your feet. 

Have fun with the trip.  I hope this helps

[notaprof]

My little one flew before 3 months old and had flown about 15-20 times by age 2. 

Wow, my kids didn't even walk until they were 9-12 months old! Sorry, that is how I read your sentence at first and it struck me as funny.

I just wanted to add one disclaimer about nursing or giving a bottle at take off and landings to deal with ear pain.  My doctor had given me this advice and I did this with mine but we had two connections and short flights and he proceeded to throw up all over me just as we landed.  A pacifier might be safer for relieving ear pressure.

[speech_chick]

Well, just to further confuse the issue...

I traveled extensively with my sons when they were this age. A 12 hour car trip was nothing to us and we could knock it out in a day. I would suggest going by car just because of all of the stuff that you need to take along when kids are this age..car seat, stroller, diaper bag, toys, food, etc. Most 9 m/os are still napping twice a day, so if you time it right you can capitalize on those 2 naps with a stop in between for lunch and time to burn off some energy. Snacks like Cheerios, board books, and elaborate infant toys will keep your child busy in the car.

If you do opt for the plane, most safety experts do recommend getting a separate seat for you child. In case of turbulence there have been cases of babies being bounced or jarred out of the unsuspecting parent's lap and being injured. Safety aside, if you child does well in a car seat it further communicates that idea of once you are in the car seat, you stay in the car seat until the destination is reached.

[mistyflannigan]

I'm not sure if you can even bring formula on board anymore.  Some people may attack me, but I gave my kids children's antihistamines before air travel.  This helped with painful pressure buildup in the ears and made the kid sleepy.  Ask your pediatrician.  I used to be a nurse and all of my colleagues (including a number of physicians) used OTC medications.  If your child is prone to ear infections, I would use something with Tylenol for pain.  If you can nurse the baby upon take off and landing, other passengers will be very grateful.  There will come a time when your child is old enough to sit still for a trans-Atlantic flight as long as  he has a portable game system.

[spork]

Go by car unless you are flying first class.  For every well-behaved baby in coach there are 20 that are not.