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[belleoftheball]

Wow. Can I borrow your friend, Merce??? How wonderful to have a friend like that!

[enviroabd]

I want one too... wait, I have my Mom.  Yeah, I'm living at home to save money while writing. I help out some, but my parents do a lot of the work around the house while I bang my head against my keyboard.

Having friends/family to take care of you is great. But even better - I have a friend who offered to edit my whole dissertation.

[merce]

My Spring Break is ending.
Waaaah!
I'm so depressed not to have a fully completed draft ready for my advisor. I cannot work while school is in session.

And have I mentioned I"m getting fired if I don't defend in May?

[enviroabd]

And have I mentioned I"m getting fired if I don't defend in May?

Yes!  So go write instead of posting!

[illuminata]

And Merce, can you take a sick day or something to get it wrapped up? Get a 'guest speaker' for a couple of classes even?

I've gotten less done than I'd hoped this week, too (but I don't have a job, so can't get fired). Hayfever, NCAA tourney, and having to send out round three of job apps. has stalled me out. Today, however, I shall finish Master's requested revisions. If it kills me.

[cloudberry]

Hi--All
Grad_Geek==Excellent advice...I think that I want it to be great, coming out of the starting gate........I know now that it can't---love the quote....Thanks....I have it printed --- on my BB.

Grad_Geek  Anne Lamott's book Bird by Bird has a chapter titled, "S***ty First Drafts."  She says, "All good writers write them.  That is how they end up with good second drafts and terrific third drafts."  (p.21)

The point is, just write something, even if it's crap.  It's easier to edit crap than to put down perfection on a blank page. 

Have to get back at it!!  Just picked up another book at the library!!
Drowning in it!!

The best to all...
The luck of the Irish to us all!!
Cloudberry

[belleoftheball]

An Old  Irish Blessing
(Shamelessly stolen and torn to pieces by a sleep-deprived doctoral student)

May love and laughter light your days,
And warm your heart and home.

May dissertation fairies be plentiful
As you plod through your lengthy tome.

May the coffee be strong and the lamplight bright
As you work on your dissertation.

May your evil master love the latest draft
And approve you for graduation.

***************************************

Ah, yes, you can see that my Ph.D is not in literature!

Happy St. Paddy's Day!

Belle

[cloudberry]

Belle--excellent sentiment and timely, too!!
I just came up for my caffeine...in the form of black tea....(office is in the basement).. my cuppa..

Sanity to all,
Cloudberry

[enviroabd]

so, how does everyone deal with negative comments from their supervisor?

I was reading through the last set of comments I got from my advisor related to what I was writing (which my interviewees told me, and for which I have documentary evidence) which went something like:
"this isn't what I think" "you'll have to prove this to me".

It's amazing how comments can come across so negatively. I mean, it could have been "wow, this is new, I had no idea that that went back so far - make sure you cite this properly!" rather than the way it was put.

I wish that there was a way that I could say this to hu without jeopardizing my career. Sorry to generalize, but do supervisors realize how miserable their comments can make us feel?  Or am I just oversensitive?

[angel]

so, how does everyone deal with negative comments from their supervisor?

<snip>

 "you'll have to prove this to me".

It's amazing how comments can come across so negatively. I mean, it could have been "wow, this is new, I had no idea that that went back so far - make sure you cite this properly!" rather than the way it was put.

I find this interesting. I don't read 'you'll have to prove this' as negative. I read it as pragmatic and useful. But then, direct comments are what I know and understand. I'd write "more evidence needed" instead of ""wow, this is new, I had no idea that that went back so far - make sure you cite this properly!".

On the other hand, I have a good friend who had similar reactions to yours. He'd show me comments that sometimes crushed him and instead wanted softer critique and much more encouragement.

I just realized I'm in the dissertators support thread. Apologies for the intrusion.

[merce]

so, how does everyone deal with negative comments from their supervisor?

...:
"this isn't what I think" "you'll have to prove this to me".

...

Really, because I don't know your advisor or what the context of comments is I can't really make a solid claim, but I'd not be too shaken by either statement really. My advisor doesn't really write too many comments. One of my search committee members does write more and she tried to soften the blow before letting me see her comments. I don't know if her lecture did it or what, but I liked her comments. I disagree with her about a thing but I figure I'm right so it doesn't much matter. Sure, now I realize I'll have to spell it out more clearly because she doesn't see it my way, but that is good, it will just come out more clearly-- that's not a bad thing.
I wish I could get more comments really.

[merce]

I just realized I'm in the dissertators support thread. Apologies for the intrusion.

And you just supported us.

I think that is a good thing, no?
I'm not sure an apology is necessary.


aack!
Please, make me stop POsting,
MUST WRITE!!!!

[enviroabd]

I think most of us dissertators are happy to get support from wherever it comes. 

Thanks for telling me about your friend, Angel. I guess it's good to know that I'm not the only one who feels really crushed by some of the comments.  I think the cover e-mail that went along with the comments (something along the lines of "this was really disappointing... blah blah... better re-write everything" kind of set the stage for interpreting comments negatively.

[dolljepopp]

My advisor gives very little feedback, but what he does give is usually spot on.  He does not pull punches; I'm glad I took classes from him so I knew this going in.  One of my other committee members gives long detailed notes -- also usually spot on.  The two make a good pair.

The negative comments that seem to bug me the most are from a parent.  I thought I had long since outgrown caring, but every time I talk to this person, I get the same critical not-understanding-at-all-the-process question: "How close are you to finishing?"

Arrrgh!  No amount of "These things take years, not weeks!" makes a difference.  I call less often than I should, which is probably not the best coping mechanism, but it's all I've got.  I have to visit for a few days next motnh and I am dreading it...

merce, get back to work!  You can do it!

[stillstanding]

aack!
Please, make me stop POsting,
MUST WRITE!!!!

Merce:

STOP POSTING.
DON'T STOP WRITING.
MUST WRITE.
WRITE.
MUST.
DON'T STOP.