schnoink
New member

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« on: January 10, 2007, 03:06:15 PM » |
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Hello... When submitting an application packet for an academic position, should the CV be left unstapled? If the CV is unstapled, what about the other items in the packet, should they also be unstapled? Thanks
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larryc
Hu hatin'
Distinguished Senior Member
    
Posts: 17,555
Eschew the hu.
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« Reply #1 on: January 10, 2007, 03:18:14 PM » |
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Schnoink, I am telling you as a friend: Leave this thread now and don't come back. It is going to get snarky.
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angel
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« Reply #2 on: January 10, 2007, 03:28:48 PM » |
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science_expat
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« Reply #3 on: January 10, 2007, 03:35:05 PM » |
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Hello... When submitting an application packet for an academic position, should the CV be left unstapled? If the CV is unstapled, what about the other items in the packet, should they also be unstapled? Thanks
It depends on the paper color. *Running away looking over shoulder at LarryC*
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Professor of Something Scarily Scientific Sounding
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flyguy
I can't believe they let me be a
Senior member
   
Posts: 548
Proving once again quantity rules over quality
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« Reply #4 on: January 10, 2007, 03:41:21 PM » |
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My letter of application is sent anonymously, and written for the position I think the SC should be filling. I find a spray of Calvin Klein’s Obsession to work wonders.
I always duct tape my CV to a small rodent (not a mouse, but something exotic like a kangaroo rat or naked mole rat). If you're lucky, the critter will have not chewed any of the important parts of the document during transit and the SC will get a new pet for their collection.
My research interests gets sent along in a separate packet (addressed to the SC, but with “Dear Tiger Drawers” as I usually don’t know who to address it to). I print it on black paper with white ink, encase the whole thing in acrylic, along with a photo me sitting at my computer typing it up (as "evidence").
I prefer to express my teaching philosophy in mime, so I include a video tape of me a la Marcel Marso using “trapped in a box” to articulate how I think it's vital that students actively participate in research.
I find that these steps will assume you of not reducing your chance of getting a job. In fact, they will make you quite memorable. (too late larryc)
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"I don't accessorize. I'm Howard Moon. There's a simple truth to me." Howard Moon
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nailman
Longwinded
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Posts: 333
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« Reply #5 on: January 10, 2007, 03:44:54 PM » |
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Stapled. That way when you and all of the other applicants except me send your CVs in stapled, I will be the only one left in the running, and be a shoe-in for the job.
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eagle
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« Reply #6 on: January 10, 2007, 03:47:40 PM » |
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I always duct tape my CV to a small rodent (not a mouse, but something exotic like a kangaroo rat or naked mole rat). If you're lucky, the critter will have not chewed any of the important parts of the document during transit and the SC will get a new pet for their collection.
I am, like, so totally using that the next time I send an application. Well, once I get the wording of my sentence corrected. Personally, I like to staple all four corners of every document. With the thousands of applications coming in for each position, I don't want any of my pages to get mixed in with others'. In addition, once I have everything in the envelope I like to put three or four more staples through the whole thing so if the envelope happens to get damaged en route, everything will still make it to the intended destination.
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francie_
The Really Cheerful
Distinguished Senior Member
    
Posts: 3,815
The Voice of Reason
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« Reply #7 on: January 10, 2007, 03:48:51 PM » |
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I always staple my CV, but use colored staples, usually pink or purple.
In a similar fashion to Flyguy, I express my teaching philosophy using interpretive dance. I direct the SC to the appropriate page on YouTube where it is posted.
And no Obsession for me. I use L'Occitane Roses. Very old-fashioned, just like me.
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Oh realfrancie, so clever!
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flyguy
I can't believe they let me be a
Senior member
   
Posts: 548
Proving once again quantity rules over quality
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« Reply #8 on: January 10, 2007, 03:50:16 PM » |
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I always duct tape my CV to a small rodent (not a mouse, but something exotic like a kangaroo rat or naked mole rat). If you're lucky, the critter will have not chewed any of the important parts of the document during transit and the SC will get a new pet for their collection.
I am, like, so totally using that the next time I send an application. Well, once I get the wording of my sentence corrected. Personally, I like to staple all four corners of every document. With the thousands of applications coming in for each position, I don't want any of my pages to get mixed in with others'. In addition, once I have everything in the envelope I like to put three or four more staples through the whole thing so if the envelope happens to get damaged en route, everything will still make it to the intended destination. Damn the staples, full duct tape ahead!
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"I don't accessorize. I'm Howard Moon. There's a simple truth to me." Howard Moon
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busyslinky
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« Reply #9 on: January 10, 2007, 03:50:51 PM » |
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Mine is always stapled.
Upper left hand corner. I wouldn't do right or bottom corners.
You could try it that way, it will get you noticed, and then get thrown out.
I sometimes call the secretary and search committee chair beforehand to ask them their preference on stapling. I think RU/VH and RU/H like it stapled, since they expect lots of publications to be listed. SLAC's and CC's would probably not, since they can't afford those little staple remover thingamabobs.
But, I think the Harvard style (since they are RU/VH) recommends staples, but not with the indentations in the staples, parallel to the top of the paper. Chicago style prefers the idented staples, at an angle to the corner. APA and MLA prefer indented with parallel to the length of the paper.
I would ask the SC and the secretary which style they prefer. I would not stop asking or bugging them until they provided me with a preference.
With CC's and SLAC's it's much easier, that's why they get many more applications.
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Such a wonderful toy!
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nailman
Longwinded
Senior member
   
Posts: 333
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« Reply #10 on: January 10, 2007, 03:52:37 PM » |
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I have to say, I think this is my favorite thread ever.
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flyguy
I can't believe they let me be a
Senior member
   
Posts: 548
Proving once again quantity rules over quality
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« Reply #11 on: January 10, 2007, 03:55:56 PM » |
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I have to say, I think this is my favorite thread ever.
I tried thread, it kept breaking (thus the duct tape).
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"I don't accessorize. I'm Howard Moon. There's a simple truth to me." Howard Moon
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eagle
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« Reply #12 on: January 10, 2007, 04:02:52 PM » |
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I tried thread, it kept breaking (thus the duct tape).
Do you use the plain old gray duct tape, or are you going for the new-fangled colored (or camouflage!) duct tape? I tried using those purple staples for my multitude of staples and they didn't even acknowledge that in my rejection letters. I might have to try the duct tape approach if the naked mole rat doesn't work to get me a job.
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postmodern
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« Reply #13 on: January 10, 2007, 04:06:39 PM » |
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In lieu of a portfolio of artwork, I think I will send my next application with instructions on how to turn it into an art piece. I will instruct the SC to scatter the papers about on the floor, pick them back up at random, turn each piece counter-clockwise, and finally cut them to create organic shapes. The paper that happens to be on top will then suffice as my cover letter. I'll call this act a performance piece.
See, I wouldn't need to worry about staples at all. They'd be so impressed with me.
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flyguy
I can't believe they let me be a
Senior member
   
Posts: 548
Proving once again quantity rules over quality
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« Reply #14 on: January 10, 2007, 04:08:30 PM » |
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I tried thread, it kept breaking (thus the duct tape).
Do you use the plain old gray duct tape, or are you going for the new-fangled colored (or camouflage!) duct tape? Old gray stuff is still the best (the kind that smells like burnt plastic). I might have to try the duct tape approach if the naked mole rat doesn't work to get me a job.
BTW, my naked mole rate (hereafter NMR, because you know it's gonna come up again) never seemed to be that interested in working for me. Just used to sit there shivering on the desk with a ream of paper taped to it's back. I gotta get a new NMR supplier. Mine are obviously worthless.
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"I don't accessorize. I'm Howard Moon. There's a simple truth to me." Howard Moon
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