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[sir_lancelot]

Not an e-mail, but a comment in class:

We had a mid-term. I had announced it weeks ahead of time, marked it in the class calendar and sent e-mail reminders to all students. We had also gone through the material the day before. One student didn't do well, seemed confused. I asked him why and he said he had not known that there would be a test on that day and so he didn't come prepared. I was floored. How could he not know about the test? Did he not read his e-mail, did he not hear the announcements? He said, he had gotten all of those but he thought we would sit together on that day and make up the questions for the test, he wasn't aware that he needed to take the test!!!  HUH???

[dagny]

sir_lancelot, I had a very similar experience recently. My students read several short supplemental readings over the course of the semester and write a brief response to them. About a week before the first one is due, we start to talk about it extensively--what I'm looking for in the responses, where to find the readings, where to download the assignment sheet, how to format the responses, all that good stuff. If they are in class or check Blackboard any one day that last week before it's due, they see me beat this topic to death.

One student wrote a half-page of random nonsense about the topic of the first reading. He clearly hadn't read the article or even glanced at the assignment sheet. I gave him a 0 for that assignment, and explained why in detail. I received the following e-mail in return:

"I COULD not find the subject you wanted us to write on.  I class you kept saying the paper on (topic) was due and i thought it was what we discussed in class the wednesday before is what we were supposed to write on.  PLEASE be more specific  and guide the class on the exact subject we are supposed to write about.  Everyone has a different track mind and thinks differently.  What you assumed  I automatically knew to write about i did not.  I also looked on the syllabus and there were no instructions for what specific subject to write on.  Please guide me more carefully next time because i cannot continue to get 0% on my assignments especially if i honestly put forth effort!"

He's right, the syllabus contains no info about the assignments--that's why it's all over Blackboard, and why I talk about it three separate times in class! The e-mail I sent him in response to this gem was pretty blistering. I haven't heard from him since.

[supernumerary]

What a great thread. Here's one I got from a confused first-year student who couldn't figure out her timetable, the online registration, etc, at law school in the UK:

"iv checked my timetable sevral times and cannot find any allocated seminars or lectures!why is this? i have handouts from lectures but am not registered for the lecture on my student data system online page?!?! do i need to go and see the law office or as i am doing joint honours does it mean that i will be doing the classes at a later date? i am very confused?!?!?! i want to qualify with a practicing law degree so i need to do these courses! can you hep me clear this up!"

Uh, no, I couldn't hep her clear it up. I did feel sorry for her though. This was three or four weeks into the semester and she was that lost.

[smart_e_pantz]

Not an email...  face-to-face interaction this morning in the middle of the exam:

STUDENT: Are we supposed to use the formula for proportions for this question?

ME: You are supposed to be able to read the question and figure out what formula to use.

STUDENT: You are supposed to give us problems like the ones on the homework!

ME: Go sit down and finish your exam!

[newbie]

I just had a student email me to say this:

Professor Newbie,

I am aware that my paper is late but I just cannot find the information I need to fill out anywhere but I've already done the assignment. Can you send me the assignment please?
Thank you,
Student

I give her credit for saying thanks. But how many times do I have to announce in the class that students need to check blackboard on a regular basis? Plus I handed out the information about the assignment in class on paper too. And how has she already done it if she hasn't found the information she needs to fill out?

I just checked blackboard and this student has never logged in. Lovely.

Ugh. Feels like a Monday for sure.

[dr_evil]

Here's a classic:
 

Dr. Evil,
Because of my absence today, I was wondering what exactly will be on tomorrow's quiz.

(Emphasis added)

Yes, as if I tell anyone "exactly" what is on the quiz.

[anthroid]

I gave a test today at around 9 a.m.  I had handed out a study guide (from which the entire test is drawn) last Wednesday.  I mentioned the test Monday, Wednesday, and Friday of last week.  The test date is in the syllabus.  I received this email at 8:36 this morning:

"I wasn't aware that I wasn't going to be able to come to class today. I went to rehab for my leg this morning and the trainer asked me to go see the doctor and the only time was at 9:15. I am pretty sure that there is a test today, but he said that is was important for me to go to the doctor. I hope that I will be able to take the test at a later date if possible. Thank you very much and I am sorry for the inconvience."

Dr. Anthroid's answer was no and gosh, what a surprise given the syllabus, the fact that I discussed the test every darn day we met last week, and the fact that I handed out a study guide (which, BTW, had the test date on it).  A copy of my reply was sent to the academic advisor for the athletes.

Gak.  I hope he plays baseball better than he takes my class.

[smart_e_pantz]

HELP. ME!

Hi, I just wanted to send you an e-mail to explain what's going on with me.  I've never been a good math student. I have always been an A and B student except when it comes to math. Almost all of my previous math teachers were either fired or left halfway through the year so I ended up teaching myself for the remainder of the class. I was also diagnosed with ADHD this summer and have apparently had it since 4th grade but was never medicated for it. I started taking medicine for it about 2 weeks ago. Please understand that I'm not making excuses, but there are medical issues that have affected my learning recently. In February 2006, I slipped on black ice and fell face first onto concrete and ice. I broke my nose, my jaw and knocked out my two front teeth. In addition to the physical damage, I also apparently had a concussion and suffered from short term memory loss and concentration issues (hence the testing that led to the discovery of the ADHD). Again, I'm not trying to make excuses, but just wanted to hopefully give you a little insight into me as a person/student.
   
To prepare for today's exam, I studied a little bit every night, going over the information we learned that day in class just to make sure it all made sense to me. Also, I didn't go on a weekend trip with my sorority this past weekend because I wanted to make sure I had enough time to accurately prepare for today's test. So because all of my roommates were gone, I had the entire weekend to spend in a good study environment; quiet and no distractions. I reread all of the notes I took in class, highlighted them, rewrote them, and highlighted the rewritten notes. I also read the book and highlighted information in there. In addition to that, I redid all of the homework problems again and checked on Blackboard to make sure I was doing it right and that my final answers and interpretations were correct. I also went into the book and did all of the odd numbered problems and checked in the back of the book to make sure my answers were correct. I honestly believed that I did the very best I could to prepare for today's exam. However, when I got to class, I'm not sure what happened, but I wasn't able to answer two of the questions on the exam. That's not like me. As I said before, I am normally a good student. I have a Presidential Scholarship from S(mall)LAC and have an average GPA of around 3.5. For some reason, I couldn't perform well on today's test.

I'm very frustrated because I KNOW that I know the information and I know there isn't anything I could have done to prepare any more than I already had. I just wanted to make sure I told you that despite what my grades might show, I am determined to do well in class. I come every day and I pay attention and I try to participate when I can and as you might remember, I've come up to you on a few occasions after class or when we have time to work on our homework to make sure I know what I'm doing. I'm just upset that my grades, for whatever reason, aren't reflecting my effort. I know that some teachers have an opinion that college kids aren't interested in their education and just come to college to goof around or because their parents make them. I am not one of those students. I just wanted to let you know that I am honestly trying my hardest to do well in class and that I'm trying to figure out why I can get A's and A/B's in every other class that I am enrolled in but for some reason, I can't get my grades in Stats to that level. I study "correctly", I get enough sleep before exams, I eat a proper diet; I'm wondering if it's possible to have a learning disability in Math? That might sound crazy, but maybe you have heard of something of the sort? Or have had experience with another student who is having the same problem?

I am really trying to get my grades in Stats up. If you have any suggestions, I would gladly take them. Also, if you offer any form of extra credit, be it extra problems, or writing a paper explaining the importance of Statistics in my major, please please let me know. Like I've said before, I really want to do well in this class. So please let me know if there is anything else that I can do. Thank you so much for taking the time to read this!

[acrimone]

HELP. ME!

Hi, I just wanted to send you an e-mail to explain what's going on with me.  I've never been a good math student. I have always been an A and B student except when it comes to math. Almost all of my previous math teachers were either fired or left halfway through the year so I ended up teaching myself for the remainder of the class. I was also diagnosed with ADHD this summer and have apparently had it since 4th grade but was never medicated for it. I started taking medicine for it about 2 weeks ago. Please understand that I'm not making excuses, but there are medical issues that have affected my learning recently. In February 2006, I slipped on black ice and fell face first onto concrete and ice. I broke my nose, my jaw and knocked out my two front teeth. In addition to the physical damage, I also apparently had a concussion and suffered from short term memory loss and concentration issues (hence the testing that led to the discovery of the ADHD). Again, I'm not trying to make excuses, but just wanted to hopefully give you a little insight into me as a person/student.
   
To prepare for today's exam, I studied a little bit every night, going over the information we learned that day in class just to make sure it all made sense to me. Also, I didn't go on a weekend trip with my sorority this past weekend because I wanted to make sure I had enough time to accurately prepare for today's test. So because all of my roommates were gone, I had the entire weekend to spend in a good study environment; quiet and no distractions. I reread all of the notes I took in class, highlighted them, rewrote them, and highlighted the rewritten notes. I also read the book and highlighted information in there. In addition to that, I redid all of the homework problems again and checked on Blackboard to make sure I was doing it right and that my final answers and interpretations were correct. I also went into the book and did all of the odd numbered problems and checked in the back of the book to make sure my answers were correct. I honestly believed that I did the very best I could to prepare for today's exam. However, when I got to class, I'm not sure what happened, but I wasn't able to answer two of the questions on the exam. That's not like me. As I said before, I am normally a good student. I have a Presidential Scholarship from S(mall)LAC and have an average GPA of around 3.5. For some reason, I couldn't perform well on today's test.

I'm very frustrated because I KNOW that I know the information and I know there isn't anything I could have done to prepare any more than I already had. I just wanted to make sure I told you that despite what my grades might show, I am determined to do well in class. I come every day and I pay attention and I try to participate when I can and as you might remember, I've come up to you on a few occasions after class or when we have time to work on our homework to make sure I know what I'm doing. I'm just upset that my grades, for whatever reason, aren't reflecting my effort. I know that some teachers have an opinion that college kids aren't interested in their education and just come to college to goof around or because their parents make them. I am not one of those students. I just wanted to let you know that I am honestly trying my hardest to do well in class and that I'm trying to figure out why I can get A's and A/B's in every other class that I am enrolled in but for some reason, I can't get my grades in Stats to that level. I study "correctly", I get enough sleep before exams, I eat a proper diet; I'm wondering if it's possible to have a learning disability in Math? That might sound crazy, but maybe you have heard of something of the sort? Or have had experience with another student who is having the same problem?

I am really trying to get my grades in Stats up. If you have any suggestions, I would gladly take them. Also, if you offer any form of extra credit, be it extra problems, or writing a paper explaining the importance of Statistics in my major, please please let me know. Like I've said before, I really want to do well in this class. So please let me know if there is anything else that I can do. Thank you so much for taking the time to read this!

Dear student,

It sounds like you've got an excellent attitude about my class, and about your education in general.  I am sure that will serve you well in the future, even if you don't get the grade you want in my class.  But maybe there's something we can do about that.

If you are having difficulty with the material, please feel free to come by during office hours.  Bring your notes, rewritten notes, highlighted book, and the additional problem sets you've done, and we'll see if we can't get to the bottom of the problems you're having.  Also, bring your normal homework for the relevant chapters as well.  There might be some sort of systemic flaw in the way you are approaching the material and I am more than willing to help you get to the bottom of that.

Obviously, you'll get whatever grade you earned on the exam.  But with some luck and hard work, maybe you'll do better on the remaining quizzes and exams.

Sincerely yours,

Professor Garcia

[smart_e_pantz]

Professor Garcia:

Do you mind if I cut and paste that into an email for the student.  It's perfect.  I wouldn't change a thing.

[acrimone]

Not at all.

[scientiffikk]

Not an e-mail, but a comment in class:

We had a mid-term. I had announced it weeks ahead of time, marked it in the class calendar and sent e-mail reminders to all students. We had also gone through the material the day before. One student didn't do well, seemed confused. I asked him why and he said he had not known that there would be a test on that day and so he didn't come prepared. I was floored. How could he not know about the test? Did he not read his e-mail, did he not hear the announcements? He said, he had gotten all of those but he thought we would sit together on that day and make up the questions for the test, he wasn't aware that he needed to take the test!!!  HUH???

Did you tell the class that they would "take" the exam or "write" the exam on that date?  My Canadian spouse says "write" whereas those of us from the US say "take".  It confused the students when hu adjuncted.  (My first use of hu.  Whee!)  Canadians also say they will assign "marks" instead of "grades."

[dagny]

DAH! Smarty_pants, I get those sometimes too. When I offer to sit down with the students about it, they very rarely take me up on it.

I've had students e-mail me requests for "study tips." I usually send a few brief ones, but I also let them know that we really should chat in my office about that kind of thing, because there's way more to studying for my class than what I can (or will) type up in an e-mail. It's really sad how few of them ever show up.

[larryc]

A course website can really cut down on your email load. Even a simple site with your syllabus, handouts, and a discussion board for course policies questions will absorb most student email.

[gennimom]

Larry, that's presupposing these students even look at the website.
Hence the emails.