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svenc
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« Reply #9750 on: October 23, 2009, 11:18:45 AM » |
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B_G_H, I would also add something like, "Sincerely, Dr. B_G_H," as a subtle hint about the form of address. Also thank the student for his/her interest, so no one can possibly criticize you for the form of your e-mail (though it doesn't sound like the student would try to complain about that).
On preview: Snotty and condescending would feel good, but if the student becomes irate and takes a copy of your e-mail to a dean or department chair it won't look so good. As I say, it doesn't sound like the student would do this, but CYA anyhow.
Oh, I restrained myself. I answered with a version of what Barred_Owl suggested. I did specifically include the word "no." Still, I can't help but wonder why the student asked me to advise her of her options. I told her that I don't know what they are, other than finding two classes that don't conflict. Heh. This student really wants you, a professor at another institution, to offer her the equivalent of an independent study. Hell to the no! And I think the only advice you can give is to seek out the advice of people at her own institution. |
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In foris veritas.
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big_giant_head
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« Reply #9751 on: October 23, 2009, 11:50:39 AM » |
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B_G_H, I would also add something like, "Sincerely, Dr. B_G_H," as a subtle hint about the form of address. Also thank the student for his/her interest, so no one can possibly criticize you for the form of your e-mail (though it doesn't sound like the student would try to complain about that).
On preview: Snotty and condescending would feel good, but if the student becomes irate and takes a copy of your e-mail to a dean or department chair it won't look so good. As I say, it doesn't sound like the student would do this, but CYA anyhow.
Oh, I restrained myself. I answered with a version of what Barred_Owl suggested. I did specifically include the word "no." Still, I can't help but wonder why the student asked me to advise her of her options. I told her that I don't know what they are, other than finding two classes that don't conflict. Heh. This student really wants you, a professor at another institution, to offer her the equivalent of an independent study. Hell to the no! And I think the only advice you can give is to seek out the advice of people at her own institution. I was an adjunct there for a couple of years. I'm pretty sure they would allow one of their students to take two conflicting classes if the student cried hard enough about it. That institution makes a point of being so student-friendly that they once told me to accept a student's homework two months after the semester had ended. |
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carthago can haz delenda
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mystictechgal
Happy in my "full, rich adulthood", and as a
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Posts: 9,404
One step at a time
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« Reply #9752 on: October 24, 2009, 01:40:19 PM » |
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So here's the email I just received:
Hello Mrs BGH:
My name is Desperately Disorganized I am a student at Nearby University, I'm planning on taking your ______ lit 2 class in the spring at Your CC, its one of two classes i will be taking at Your CC, the only i problem i have and i was wondering would possible, the second 8weeks of the semester I start an 8 week class at Nearby. Both classes i need for graduation so i'm in a bit of a panic, Is there is Any possible way that i would be able to do the homework, either bring it by or email it to you that last 8 weeks of class, and if they are any days which i dont meet for my class here I would be in class, but just incase that does not happen, i was just wondering what my options are? I know I'm asking a lot and i'm so sorry , i'm just in a panic trying to graduate and i have two gen ed classes that are important.
If you could let me know what my options are that would be great.
thanks
DD
I have drafted my reply. Should I send this?:
I do sympathize with your situation, but a large portion of the value a literature course is the discussion in class. I just don't see how it would be possible for a student to take two classes at the same time and pass both of them. (And while you almost certainly did not mean it, what you're asking for here implies that my class is so unimportant and easy to pass that students don't really need to attend it--I notice that you didn't say you would attend my class and miss the other one. I am sure this is not what you intended to convey, but it can't hurt to be aware that this is a perfectly reasonable assumption for a reader to make. Remember that college faculty tend to be passionate about their fields, and to believe that what we do in the classroom has at least a little value to our students.)
Given this soon-to-be college graduate's evident level of literacy I think you should be grateful that it was your class s/he dismissed as unimportant to attend. You dodged a bullet with this one. Perhaps you could work your "no way in Hades" into a "thank you" letter. |
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If a pouting pluot ploughman planted pluots in a plot, and the plot were ploughed on Pluto, would his pluot ploy play out?
"Is all the same, only different" -- Dr. H. L. |
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galactic_hedgehog
Procrastinating, Python-quoting, Blue Blazer-drinking, chocolate-chip cookie-eating, Pastafarian, Not So
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Posts: 17,915
Mind Ninja
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« Reply #9753 on: October 24, 2009, 10:56:03 PM » |
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I love it. I am ordering them tonight.
I think it also works as a statement of teaching philosophy. There is something very honest about it. I actually think it would work for a research statement also. I am looking into getting a banner-sized version for my office door. Hmmm, and holiday cards too im bizzy with school cant be bothered with prezents for u guys and dont expect thank u notes either happy holidays dont call unless its important ok? Anyone have a silly animal picture? We need to get this into icanhascheezburger. lolprofs! |
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"A pun is primâ facie an insult to the person you are talking with. It implies utter indifference to or sublime contempt for his remarks, no matter how serious." -- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr. Hedgie loves to read. |
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scampster
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« Reply #9754 on: October 24, 2009, 11:01:29 PM » |
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I love it. I am ordering them tonight.
I think it also works as a statement of teaching philosophy. There is something very honest about it. I actually think it would work for a research statement also. I am looking into getting a banner-sized version for my office door. Hmmm, and holiday cards too im bizzy with school cant be bothered with prezents for u guys and dont expect thank u notes either happy holidays dont call unless its important ok? Anyone have a silly animal picture? We need to get this into icanhascheezburger. lolprofs! Excellent! My favorite so far was the Noam Chomsky "Noam Noam Noam" one. |
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When you are a scientist your opinions and prejudices become facts. Science is like magic that way!
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oseph
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« Reply #9755 on: October 24, 2009, 11:05:46 PM » |
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I love it. I am ordering them tonight.
I think it also works as a statement of teaching philosophy. There is something very honest about it. I actually think it would work for a research statement also. I am looking into getting a banner-sized version for my office door. Hmmm, and holiday cards too im bizzy with school cant be bothered with prezents for u guys and dont expect thank u notes either happy holidays dont call unless its important ok? Anyone have a silly animal picture? We need to get this into icanhascheezburger. lolprofs! Mine would have to have a look of utter incredulity and would say something like OMG r u that stoopid how iz that reluvunt im audi, teech urselvz wize menz |
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Oseph....you are right and you make sense.
For your future comments, I insult very directly.
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conjugate
Compulsive punster and insatiable reader, and
Member-Moderator
Distinguished Senior Member
Posts: 16,691
Tends to have warped sense of humor
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« Reply #9756 on: October 25, 2009, 12:15:35 AM » |
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Anyone have a silly animal picture? We need to get this into icanhascheezburger.
lolprofs! Excellent! My favorite so far was the Noam Chomsky "Noam Noam Noam" one. I followed a link, and found Chaucer's blog. I am greatly impressed, even though I can hardly read it. I never learned (like most of my classmates) how to decipher the prolog of the Canterbury Tales. I hope others here will be pleased and impressed. |
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Unfortunately, I think conjugate gives good advice.
∀ε>0∃δ>0∋|x–a|<δ⇒|ƒ(x)-ƒ(a)|<ε |
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concordancia
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« Reply #9757 on: October 25, 2009, 12:52:07 AM » |
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Anyone have a silly animal picture? We need to get this into icanhascheezburger.
lolprofs! Excellent! My favorite so far was the Noam Chomsky "Noam Noam Noam" one. I followed a link, and found Chaucer's blog. I am greatly impressed, even though I can hardly read it. I never learned (like most of my classmates) how to decipher the prolog of the Canterbury Tales. I hope others here will be pleased and impressed. Thanks! That is fun. We used to do stuff like this in grad school, but to the best of my knowledge, it was never circulated to a broader public than the grad lounge and nearby coffee shop. |
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I like money. I like to buy stuff and experiences with money.
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polly_mer
teaching science to the masses one person at a time
Distinguished Senior Member
Posts: 28,389
Do you want a career in science? Sure, you do!
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« Reply #9758 on: October 25, 2009, 07:46:41 AM » |
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I was sent a jewel last night. Dear Dr. Mer,
I got a zero for quiz X. I did quiz X. Explain to me if you can why I got a zero for a quiz that I did.
thanks,
Student-who-is-worried-about-the-wrong-things-because-failure-is-so-an-option The reply I wanted to send is:
Hey Student,
Why, yes, I can explain it to you. Are you sure you can understand the explicit details about why you got a zero on a quiz that you left blank and why I expected you could review your quiz feedback where it states "Blank is zero?" to draw a reasonable conclusion? If yes, come to my office hours on Monday and I'll explain it to you using small words and diagrams.
Best,
Dr. Mer
Since this student has submitted other Blackboard quizzes that were not blank, I'm not going to buy the "But I didn't know I had to press 'submit' to get my answers into the system" as an excuse for the chance at 9 points. |
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It is only a match if you shout back. Otherwise it is your colleague acting like a lunatic.
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marigolds
looks far too young to be a
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Posts: 6,293
if it ain't ruff it ain't me
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« Reply #9759 on: October 25, 2009, 08:08:54 AM » |
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Anyone have a silly animal picture? We need to get this into icanhascheezburger.
lolprofs! Excellent! My favorite so far was the Noam Chomsky "Noam Noam Noam" one. I followed a link, and found Chaucer's blog. I am greatly impressed, even though I can hardly read it. I never learned (like most of my classmates) how to decipher the prolog of the Canterbury Tales. I hope others here will be pleased and impressed. Thanks! That is fun. We used to do stuff like this in grad school, but to the best of my knowledge, it was never circulated to a broader public than the grad lounge and nearby coffee shop. This is awesome, Conjy. Thanks for posting it. |
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"You and your mom are hillbillies. This is a house of learned doctors."
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geonerd
Couldn't be an apex predator so I settled for being a
Distinguished Senior Member
Posts: 5,265
Do not take the bait
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« Reply #9760 on: October 25, 2009, 11:00:20 AM » |
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Explain to me if you can why I got a zero for a quiz that I did.
Dear Student, Oh I can explain it, but I choose not to. My fantasy snark for the day... |
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How many of your grandmothers still are living, and how is their health?
Traffic doesn't care what I think of it. |
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mended_drum
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« Reply #9761 on: October 25, 2009, 11:18:47 AM » |
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Anyone have a silly animal picture? We need to get this into icanhascheezburger.
lolprofs! Chaucer's blog is awesome, even if Phillipa is addicted to Vespers, a new work about sparkylng vampyres. Someone beat us to it.Excellent! My favorite so far was the Noam Chomsky "Noam Noam Noam" one. I followed a link, and found Chaucer's blog. I am greatly impressed, even though I can hardly read it. I never learned (like most of my classmates) how to decipher the prolog of the Canterbury Tales. I hope others here will be pleased and impressed. |
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magistra
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« Reply #9762 on: October 25, 2009, 03:05:48 PM » |
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Anyone have a silly animal picture? We need to get this into icanhascheezburger.
lolprofs! Chaucer's blog is awesome, even if Phillipa is addicted to Vespers, a new work about sparkylng vampyres. Someone beat us to it.Excellent! My favorite so far was the Noam Chomsky "Noam Noam Noam" one. I followed a link, and found Chaucer's blog. I am greatly impressed, even though I can hardly read it. I never learned (like most of my classmates) how to decipher the prolog of the Canterbury Tales. I hope others here will be pleased and impressed. My God, people! Did you read the one about the MLA? "And right so it befel in dede that a volvo did pulle up and a voys from it seyd, “You going to Philadelphia?” And thys creatur seyd, “I go to MLA,” and the voys seyde that MLA was part of Philadelphee and thus sche cam with hem. And in the volvo was a cumpany of thre yonge scolers, to wit I woman and II men. And thys creatur spak to them and seyd, “Tell me what maner ffolk ye aren.” And oon the men seyd, “My dissertation addresses the pressing question of the relation of the Owl and the Nightingale to the paradoxes of materiality and to changing ideas of spirituality at the same time that it questions what I would call outmoded models of allegoresis. Essentially, I propose that this heavily mediated text engages with debate poetry not as a generic exemplar but rather vis-a-vis an interstitial combination of truth claims and bestiary passages about cephalopods.” And thys creatur was soore confusid, and sche prayid to ower lord and wepid gret teares for the passioun of the child Jesu who had been born in a maunger to taak awey the synnes of all ffolke and also to deliver her from MLA." |
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First it was Wolfram and Hart, now it's Blackboard. There's not much moral difference, if you ask me. -- Malcha
Grammar is the chocolate in the buttery croissant of life. -- Yellowtractor
Okay, so that was petty. Today, I feel like embracing pettiness. -- Mended Drum
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littlefred
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« Reply #9763 on: October 25, 2009, 04:36:23 PM » |
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I love it. I am ordering them tonight.
I think it also works as a statement of teaching philosophy. There is something very honest about it. I have been thinking of putting it on my holiday cards.... thanks for the ideas... I actually think it would work for a research statement also. I am looking into getting a banner-sized version for my office door. Hmmm, and holiday cards too im bizzy with school cant be bothered with prezents for u guys and dont expect thank u notes either happy holidays dont call unless its important ok? Anyone have a silly animal picture? We need to get this into icanhascheezburger. lolprofs! |
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The suspense is killing me! Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue ...
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phlegmatic
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« Reply #9764 on: October 25, 2009, 05:27:37 PM » |
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I just got this one: I forgot to mention to you on Thursday that I sent my Research Proposal, I just wanted to make sure you got it. Also I know it's really late, is there anyway I can get credit for this? Maybe some sort of extra credit assignment? If you could let me know that would be great. Wait...you want extra credit for finishing an assignment late? Extra credit? Which implies that you might get any credit for turning in an assignment one month late? Mwa ha ha ha ha. (evil laugh) |
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