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dr_evil
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« Reply #9735 on: October 22, 2009, 06:32:02 PM » |
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DNFTA
Alan
What could "A" stand for? *snicker* This is going to become my new motto. I've been saving this email for a while now. I think this is finally the time to bust it out. And yes I suggested that she shared a bit too much with me.
hi, i won't be by to talk because i just decided to go ahead and call the womens clinic. see, last night i was helping my friend put down flooring on his mom's boat. i went to the bathroom to change and there was an object attach to my tamp. it was something white attached to something red. i asked him to look at it , of course he was no help, he just was weirded out. anyway the clinic call me back and said that it was just mucus attached to blood and that normally happens when your on the depo. Oh, and i had the assignment forgot to give it to you with all that on my mind. put it in your mailbox, cause i have class at 2 and i have to go to work.
Yes, I laughed. But, YUCK! EWWWW! NASTY! Add another EWWWW!!!! I'm no longer hungry; anyone want my dinner? |
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Drinking a lot always helps.
Wheeeeee! You go, oh evilicious one.
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sugaree
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« Reply #9736 on: October 22, 2009, 06:33:30 PM » |
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Not to get everyone all riled up again, but I just received the following email policy announcement from my university administration (note: not from an individual Professor Big Ego), in preparation for a possible H1N1 crisis: Students should e-mail your professor to report illness. If you live
in Residence on campus contact the Resident Assistant or Residence
Office immediately. Ensure someone knows of your illness and can assist
you.
Notice - nowhere here does it suggest that students should drag themselves into school if sick, but they are responsible for contacting relevant parties to let them know about sickness. And if a student is needing a makeup exam because s/he missed one due to illness, it is particularly irresponsible to assume that this will just "happen" without any communication. Duh! |
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where's the bourbon?
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oseph
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« Reply #9737 on: October 22, 2009, 08:40:26 PM » |
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When im bizzy with school i dont want to be bothered.
Im not going to respond unless if its important ok.
Professor Kedves
Welcome, Littlefred! I love it so much I am going to print it on a card I give to students. I just saw this before activating the spew shield. I would like 500 cards, please, except mine should read Frau Doktor Professorin Oseph, Ph.D. I am not sure if this will work, but here is what it might look like. (I will keep that page minimized for awhile so you can see it.) I love it. I am ordering them tonight. |
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Oseph....you are right and you make sense.
For your future comments, I insult very directly.
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kedves
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« Reply #9738 on: October 22, 2009, 08:52:16 PM » |
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I love it. I am ordering them tonight.
I think it also works as a statement of teaching philosophy. There is something very honest about it. |
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oseph
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« Reply #9739 on: October 22, 2009, 08:56:16 PM » |
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I love it. I am ordering them tonight.
I think it also works as a statement of teaching philosophy. There is something very honest about it. I actually think it would work for a research statement also. I am looking into getting a banner-sized version for my office door. Hmmm, and holiday cards too im bizzy with school cant be bothered with prezents for u guys and dont expect thank u notes either happy holidays dont call unless its important ok? |
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Oseph....you are right and you make sense.
For your future comments, I insult very directly.
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galactic_hedgehog
Procrastinating, Python-quoting, Blue Blazer-drinking, chocolate-chip cookie-eating, Pastafarian, Not So
Distinguished Senior Member
Posts: 17,915
Mind Ninja
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« Reply #9740 on: October 22, 2009, 09:00:45 PM » |
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I love it. I am ordering them tonight.
I think it also works as a statement of teaching philosophy. There is something very honest about it. I actually think it would work for a research statement also. I am looking into getting a banner-sized version for my office door. Hmmm, and holiday cards too im bizzy with school cant be bothered with prezents for u guys and dont expect thank u notes either happy holidays dont call unless its important ok? Anyone have a silly animal picture? We need to get this into icanhascheezburger. |
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"A pun is primâ facie an insult to the person you are talking with. It implies utter indifference to or sublime contempt for his remarks, no matter how serious." -- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr. Hedgie loves to read. |
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cc_alan
is a wossname
Distinguished Senior Member
Posts: 6,887
Caution! Nekkid zamboni driver ahead.
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« Reply #9741 on: October 22, 2009, 11:03:02 PM » |
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Not to get everyone all riled up again, but I just received the following email policy announcement from my university administration (note: not from an individual Professor Big Ego), in preparation for a possible H1N1 crisis: Students should e-mail your professor to report illness. If you live
in Residence on campus contact the Resident Assistant or Residence
Office immediately. Ensure someone knows of your illness and can assist
you.
Notice - nowhere here does it suggest that students should drag themselves into school if sick, but they are responsible for contacting relevant parties to let them know about sickness. And if a student is needing a makeup exam because s/he missed one due to illness, it is particularly irresponsible to assume that this will just "happen" without any communication. Duh! <swings and tries to knock incredibly egocentric professor off the high horse> Oh, stop it! I read from someone else that your suggestion is simply too much to expect. <insert "well thought-out" example here> <swings again but hears a shattering noise behind him> Carp. I think I just broke my own glass horse. At least my glass house is still standing. Alan (tough firmly in cheek) |
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Excuse me... which aisle would I find the unicorns and rainbows? No, Alan is a man among men, striding the Earth like a Colossus with a really big bladder, wearing a tool belt.
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polly_mer
teaching science to the masses one person at a time
Distinguished Senior Member
Posts: 28,389
Do you want a career in science? Sure, you do!
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« Reply #9742 on: October 23, 2009, 07:47:15 AM » |
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(tough firmly in cheek)
Um, Alan? This isn't that kind of thread. Try Shameless Flirtation, Cover Letter Closing Statement, The Clubhouse, or Validation Threads. |
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It is only a match if you shout back. Otherwise it is your colleague acting like a lunatic.
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big_giant_head
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« Reply #9743 on: October 23, 2009, 09:23:12 AM » |
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So here's the email I just received:
Hello Mrs BGH:
My name is Desperately Disorganized I am a student at Nearby University, I'm planning on taking your ______ lit 2 class in the spring at Your CC, its one of two classes i will be taking at Your CC, the only i problem i have and i was wondering would possible, the second 8weeks of the semester I start an 8 week class at Nearby. Both classes i need for graduation so i'm in a bit of a panic, Is there is Any possible way that i would be able to do the homework, either bring it by or email it to you that last 8 weeks of class, and if they are any days which i dont meet for my class here I would be in class, but just incase that does not happen, i was just wondering what my options are? I know I'm asking a lot and i'm so sorry , i'm just in a panic trying to graduate and i have two gen ed classes that are important.
If you could let me know what my options are that would be great.
thanks
DD
I have drafted my reply. Should I send this?:
I do sympathize with your situation, but a large portion of the value a literature course is the discussion in class. I just don't see how it would be possible for a student to take two classes at the same time and pass both of them. (And while you almost certainly did not mean it, what you're asking for here implies that my class is so unimportant and easy to pass that students don't really need to attend it--I notice that you didn't say you would attend my class and miss the other one. I am sure this is not what you intended to convey, but it can't hurt to be aware that this is a perfectly reasonable assumption for a reader to make. Remember that college faculty tend to be passionate about their fields, and to believe that what we do in the classroom has at least a little value to our students.)
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carthago can haz delenda
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barred_owl
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« Reply #9744 on: October 23, 2009, 09:35:04 AM » |
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B_G_H, I would add something along the lines of: "I'm sorry, but, no, your suggested solution of submitting your work for my class via email for 8 weeks is not possible. You must make the choice of either attending the class, in person, for the entire term, or finding a different class that does not conflict with your other obligations."
The critical word, of course, is "no." :)
Good luck!
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...I can't help rooting for the underdog underbird. |
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big_giant_head
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« Reply #9745 on: October 23, 2009, 09:39:59 AM » |
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B_G_H, I would add something along the lines of: "I'm sorry, but, no, your suggested solution of submitting your work for my class via email for 8 weeks is not possible. You must make the choice of either attending the class, in person, for the entire term, or finding a different class that does not conflict with your other obligations."
The critical word, of course, is "no." :)
Good luck!
But I can't be snotty and condescending? Not even a little? |
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carthago can haz delenda
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conjugate
Compulsive punster and insatiable reader, and
Member-Moderator
Distinguished Senior Member
Posts: 16,690
Tends to have warped sense of humor
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« Reply #9746 on: October 23, 2009, 09:41:39 AM » |
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B_G_H, I would also add something like, "Sincerely, Dr. B_G_H," as a subtle hint about the form of address. Also thank the student for his/her interest, so no one can possibly criticize you for the form of your e-mail (though it doesn't sound like the student would try to complain about that).
On preview: Snotty and condescending would feel good, but if the student becomes irate and takes a copy of your e-mail to a dean or department chair it won't look so good. As I say, it doesn't sound like the student would do this, but CYA anyhow.
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Unfortunately, I think conjugate gives good advice.
∀ε>0∃δ>0∋|x–a|<δ⇒|ƒ(x)-ƒ(a)|<ε |
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big_giant_head
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« Reply #9747 on: October 23, 2009, 09:47:01 AM » |
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B_G_H, I would also add something like, "Sincerely, Dr. B_G_H," as a subtle hint about the form of address. Also thank the student for his/her interest, so no one can possibly criticize you for the form of your e-mail (though it doesn't sound like the student would try to complain about that).
On preview: Snotty and condescending would feel good, but if the student becomes irate and takes a copy of your e-mail to a dean or department chair it won't look so good. As I say, it doesn't sound like the student would do this, but CYA anyhow.
Oh, I restrained myself. I answered with a version of what Barred_Owl suggested. I did specifically include the word "no." Still, I can't help but wonder why the student asked me to advise her of her options. I told her that I don't know what they are, other than finding two classes that don't conflict. |
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carthago can haz delenda
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barred_owl
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« Reply #9748 on: October 23, 2009, 09:53:50 AM » |
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Oh, dang! You've already replied, so I guess it's too late to modify the reply to include, "When pigs fly!" :)
Oh, well. Hopefully student will take a hint and make her own decisions. Why do I have the feeling that you might have dodged a bullet with this one, BGH?
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...I can't help rooting for the underdog underbird. |
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madhatter
We proudly present the fora's Least
Member-Moderator
Distinguished Senior Member
Posts: 5,351
Just killing time
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« Reply #9749 on: October 23, 2009, 11:11:01 AM » |
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I love it. I am ordering them tonight.
I think it also works as a statement of teaching philosophy. There is something very honest about it. I actually think it would work for a research statement also. I am looking into getting a banner-sized version for my office door. Hmmm, and holiday cards too im bizzy with school cant be bothered with prezents for u guys and dont expect thank u notes either happy holidays dont call unless its important ok? Anyone have a silly animal picture? We need to get this into icanhascheezburger. lolprofs! |
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"I may be an evil scientist, but it doesn't take a degree purchased from the Internet with your ex-wife's money to know how special and important you are to me." -- Dr. Doofenschmirtz
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