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[what's the OP?]

what's the OP? what does it mean? please splain, somebody.

[Know-it-some]

OP = original poster, the person who started the thread

[Mick Jagger]

"You can't always get what you wa-aant
But if you try sometime
You just might find
You get what you ne-eed"

You don't want me trousers to fall down now do ya?

[Anon2]

I agree with you k16. What is up with Anon's attitude? If I were a guy I'd run away from her as fast as possible. Maybe her problem in finding a guy is that she's a snob and applies strong gender-based stereotypes.

[Anon2]

Nobody is complaining about your "conventionally female traits" like how you want to wear make-up. But your OP was quite revealing in how you think about men and women. Echoing what k16 wrote, how would you respond to a post about a man "training" his girlfriend? You have some ego issues (you are so smart it's hard to find that intellectual connection with a guy, you work so much harder than everyone else). Let me guess - are you better looking than your peers? Seriously, do you think you are? Maybe it's true that you are a genius, model, hard-working goddess, but the ego probably drives some guys away.

[for fun]

the original post, gender reversal, nothing else changed, just for my own fun while getting through the last few gruelling days of school..................

This is a bit of silly rant, but I'd thought some of you would get a kick out of it. For those of you who require more serious reading, move on!

I'm dating this girl -- former sorority girl all grown up to be fairly responsible professional woman who's dated enoughomen to be trained (guys you know what I mean -- she dresses well enough without my help, keeps the pink stuff out of the bathroom, cleans the kitchen more than once every two years, calls when she says he's going to call even if she doesn't want to because she knows this is better than inspiring the wrath of the man . . . ) BUT, and why's there always "but" -- we don't have a lot in common intellectually. It's a part of me she just doesn't get and I can't discuss it with her. So I keep that part of me to myself.

I don't think I'm in it with this girl for the long haul and I'm wondering whether it's possible to find an academic/intellectual girl who's also got social skills. My blokes joke that if I found that kind of girl, she'd be a man. : ) And, in my own experience, the grad. school girls (last one was a political scientist and before that it was a chemist and before that it was a law student) who thrill me with their intelligence and academic credential have NO social skills, especially interpersonal communication skills.

So for you men out there with an academic/intellectual/grad. school girl with social skills, where did you find her? Are they a rarity or am I just looking in the wrong places?

[peep]

Reversed girl sounds like a loser!

Why did "he" seem half-way decent?

[What I need]

I have now come to the realization that I just can't be happy with a woman that doesn't have a nearly perfect body.  And I guess perfection is very different for everybody but most academic women I meet just don't seem to be very feminine and it is such a turn off.  I am an intelligent guy, confident in my sexuality and I take good care of myself.  I don't think it's too much to ask that a woman try to convey at least a little sense of primal instinct when attracting a guy.  I've met very few american women that can "do it" for me.  European guys have it much better it seems, at least on the mainland.

[biff]

Forgive me, I read only the original post and a couple of others; I assume most of this thread is an argument about whether men are shallow and/ or women are unrealistic.

To echo "What I need":  there are plenty of women out there who are attractive, and for whatever reason women in their late 20s and 30s will date guys in their mid-40s, and so it's difficult to imagine what would make a guy date someone to whom he isn't attracted.  I have a couple of female colleagues in their 40s who are perfectly nice and intelligent and pleasant to spend time with, but have been essentially dateless, certainly without a significant other, the decade I've known them.  And in both cases, I know they are sad about this.  Thing is, I have a hard time imagining one of my single male friends ever dating them, because, OF COURSE they like tight bodies, pretty faces, the works.

But PACE "What I need," in my experience there are a lot of attractive female academics.  When I was in grad school, it seemed they were everywhere.  I married one of them, and lots of my male friends married attractive grad school colleagues as well.

Over time, we all age, and a mature person who has made a commitment "for better or worse" doesn't abandon their SO over that.  BUT... when I was 27 and considering whom to date from a "pool" of women to whom I had no personal obligation, OF COURSE I looked at a physically attractive pool.  My 30-45 year old male friends do the same.  That's life.  Then, within that "pool", we look for compatibility on other issues.  

This is a supply and demand issue if ever there was one.  I in my single days, or my single friends now, would revise our expectations if they proved entirely unrealistic.  (Though I do know one particular guy who has held out far too long IMHO).

And, of course, women have their criteria for selection, too.

[rich]

I knew someone in grad school who would not date a woman unless she was rich.  He was definitely NOT rich, so he figured if he dated only rich women he would be more likely to fall in love with and marry a rich woman.  He did just that.

[%sig%]

[College Instructor]

I'm convinced I can have it all. I'm currently dating an electrician and an attorney. So far I have all four needs covered: intellectual, spiritual, emotional and physical. Unfortunately it's not with the same man!! And until I find one man with whom I connect on all four levels to some minimal degree, I'm not settling down.

[Bree Daniels]

You are such a slut.  Do you come with your Johns?