As someone who teaches in a professional writing program, I have a checklist of certain sentence-level issues I expect my students to pay attention to during the editing process. Some of these are particular pet peeves of mine or of those who will end up interviewing my students upon graduation. I’ve been in this job long enough to have heard diverse employers criticize the same types of writing issues repeatedly. One of these criticisms concerns overuse of the passive voice.
The passive voice cannot always be avoided (nor should it be). There are some uses of it, though, that do deserve attention. Think of the number of politicians who say things like, “Pollutants are being forced into the air we breathe.” Or, “Our country’s values are being destroyed.” I also hear it on the news when a crime has been committed, and the police need to be vague, so they say things like, “A window was broken and valuables were stolen.” The one example I always mention in class comes from a documentary film I once saw where a convict living in solitary confinement tries to bring attention to the negative ways he was being treated. At one point, he said something along the lines of, “I yelled. I threw food. Fires were started in my cell.” Um, why would he not claim responsibility for the fires when he was the only one in the cell at the time?
And that’s the problem. The passive voice often ignores who is responsible for what. People use it as a way to eschew culpability or avoid placing blame. But why should Prof. Hacker readers care?
Many of us are creating and revising syllabi at the moment (see the “syllabus” tag for other PH posts on the topic). As I started going over syllabi from the last time I taught this spring’s courses, something bothered me. I saw the passive voice everywhere. I’m sure each of us has phrases like, “Late papers will not be accepted” or “Readings must be completed before you come to class” or “Laptops and cell phones will not be allowed in class.” Passive voice often brings with it an air of formality, which is why it often appears in our syllabi. But I’d like to push us all to get rid of it and claim responsibility not just for ourselves but for our students. Say what you believe and why you believe it.
- “I do not accept essays that are more than three days late because…”
- “You must complete each reading assignment before class so that…”
- “I do not allow laptops or cell phones in class because…”
Sometimes, getting rid of the passive voice enhances clarity. I once taught at a place where I was required to say, “Students will be dropped from the course after five absences.” I hated that statement because it didn’t support my own pedagogical tone, making it sound like it was my policy when it was not. Today, if I could, I’d write it as, “The University of Whatever states that I must drop any student who misses more than five class meetings for any reason.” I would make it clear who is making the requirement and what roles there are for me and my students. They must attend class, or I will have to drop them because the university says so. There’s a transparency there that I like.
So, go for it. Rid your syllabi of the passive voice and claim responsibility for yourself and your students. Perhaps it will help all of us work together more honestly and easily.
(Photo by Flickr user Intenteffect, who was mentioned on Prof. Hacker last week, and licensed through Creative Commons)
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12 Responses to Rid Your Syllabi of the Passive Voice
GC Fiedler - January 14, 2010 at 12:29 am
Sorry for the typos above…
dance - January 12, 2010 at 9:45 pm
Nels, just like you say—I keep the FAQ on my own site, the same for all multiple courses, and put both a link and the entire table of contents/list of questions in the paper/pdf course-specific syllabus. I haven’t checked with students since the first couple semesters when it was an experiment, but my students said it was a fine method back then (though we are very green-minded here). It seems (and this was my original goal, to be honest) that I get fewer emails I get asking questions that the syllabus already answered, since switching to the FAQ. Although it may be that such questions annoy me less when I can snarkily respond with nothing but a link, but that’s also an acceptable outcome.
I’d say my syllabus voice is stylistically about where yours is, also—not quite as much pedagogy, proportionally.
GC Fiedler - January 14, 2010 at 12:28 am
Perhaps different disciplines do require different approaches. And different universities have different requirements and settings. I’m not writing my syllabus for anyone but my students. I’m a bit puzzled why I would be writing one for admin people or job search committees. If I was writing to serve everyone’s needs, then I could never produced a focused, concise document. But, hey, I’m not an English language professional. And the KISS principal is my mantra.
As for explaining policies – If I give my reasoning for every policy or rule in a syllabus, I waste ink and paper (not mine if they print their own). We also have to devote the first page of our syllabi to some canned standard course description stuff, so I’m not interested in wasting more space. If someone wants clarification, they can ask and they often do. What I explain on the first day is fairly minimal, e.g., why they have 3 exams instead of 2. But some things really don’t need justification. This is the policy, please follow it. For example, I’m not interested in their objections to the cellphone policy if they have them.
As for things said on day 1 being so important that they should be on the syllabi – most things are, and what I do clarify is minimal. I’ve found that students don’t do more than scan the syllabus anyway, so what’s the point of putting justifications for everything there? An FAQ sounds like a good thing to put on my website, if I can get them to consult it first before asking me. That’s a challenge. They’d have to read the syllabus to know where the FAQ is, or pay attention on day 1.
As for handing out the syllabus half way through the first class session – not possible for me. As of Fall, our faculty have to have syllabi complete for their classes for the next two terms – months in advance. Prior to that, we had to have them available two weeks before the term started. In our case, it’s good students can see a syllabus to decide well in advance to see if they want to take a course. Of course, if they actually read it is another matter.
So, I like the passive voice and will continue to use it. I also recommend it to others.
Courtney - January 11, 2010 at 6:26 pm
Very very smart treatment of an important and easy-to-overlook issue. I also teach rhetorically aware use of passive voice, and still haven’t eliminated its use on my syllabi. I’d love for my students to point out the inconsistency, but eliminating the conflict will at least make me feel better! Thanks for drawing our attention to the matter, Nels!
GC Fiedler - January 11, 2010 at 8:38 pm
I have to disagree. A syllabus is a different animal. It needs to be clear and to the point. It’s not a witness statement explaining one’s involvement in events.
The reason I use passive voice in syllabi is to avoid sounding like it’s all about ME. Nobody wants to hear what I think all the time. [If I was writing that last sentence your way it would be, "You don't want to hear what I think all the time".] “These are the policies, this is the material for this course, ” rather than “These are MY policies, this is the material for MY course.”
I also want the content to be impersonal – ON PURPOSE. This also keeps the document from being overly pedantic. If I write, “If you do not do X, then you will fail…”, that unnecessarily creates a negative image in a students mind about themselves.
I also do not put explanations of why my policies are what they are in my syllabus, so there are no such ‘because statements’. That’s not necessary – I generally explain those things in person or on the first day of class. “These are the policies” – that’s enough.
GC Fiedler - January 11, 2010 at 8:41 pm
And, yes, syllabi are formal documents. Get over that. We are expected to adhere to their content, so they are in many ways formal.
Nels P. Highberg - January 11, 2010 at 9:05 pm
I wonder if our differences of opinion might be disciplinary? One of the things that’s been pushed on me since I started teaching in various humanities fields in 1994 is that I’m supposed to make my syllabus my own. I can remember a teaching circle in the mid-1990s where we went around talking about how our syllabi represented our individual pedagogical styles and voices. Yes, we all had common elements and generic expectations, but we were expected to present them individually. (Oh, yeah, passive voice in that last independent clause, but I”ll leave it.)
And I can see how it sounds like I’m trying to promote informality or at least get away from some formality since I wrote, “Passive voice often brings with it an air of formality, which is why it often appears in our syllabi. But I’d like to push us all to get rid of it and claim responsibility not just for ourselves but for our students.” Let me clarify and say that I do not mean to say that syllabi are not formal documents. They are. But formality can emerge from a range of possibilities, and I’d like to promote a discussion of those possibilities. In other words, how can we present syllabi that do what syllabi are supposed to do while still embodying expectations of those who will receive them?
And that is why I promote the use of “because” explanations. My syllabi have been read by more audiences than students, so I feel like the explanations have to be there for those who are not a part of class. Over fifteen years of teaching, I’ve been questioned by administrators and parents. My syllabi have be read by search, award, and tenure committees, and I have put statements in my syllabi to respond to this range of questions and situations. I like how different readers have responded to the new ways I’ve been formatting and presenting my syllabi as opposed to questioning things in them. Plus, one of the things I saw in each syllabus is that students can expect an explanation for each and everything we do in class, and I intend for my syllabi to align with that principle.
As with most Prof. Hacker posts, if what you have been doing is working, then please continue. And it does help to say those things in the comments so readers can recognize the range of possibilities on whatever topic is at hand. For those who are looking for a change or are hoping to find a new angle on a common topic, we hope we do that.
And with that said, thanks, Courtney! Yes, I always feel better when class begins if the syllabus and other documents establish a particular tone for the course, and I hope thinking about this one little issue can help others find that tone if they feel they could tweak what they’ve been doing.
Abby Knoblauch - January 11, 2010 at 10:12 pm
Thanks for this post, Nels. I often find myself struggling with tone in my syllabi. I want to be very clear about policies and expectations, but I also don’t want to sound scary or intimidating (something students have, at the end of the semester, commented upon: “the first day was scary, when we went through the syllabus. It just sounds scary.”) I don’t want my syllabus to sound scary. But I do want it to be clear. So I’ve leaned more toward what you’re saying here where I try to make clear what the policies and expectations are, but also why those are the policies and expectations. I think technology is a good example. It’s not just “no cell phones or laptops” or whatever my policy might be, but, as I “borrowed” from a colleague, I note that my technology requirements stem from the ease with which we get distracted by such technology, and I remind students how important their engagement in the class is, both for them and for their peers. I like that such a move makes clear that there are thoughtful reasons behind these policies, not just policies for the sake of control.
That said, I do think that new teachers — especially young teachers, and especially young teachers who, for personal or cultural reasons, are not comfortable with authority or are not afforded cultural authority, often find comfort and a sense of security with those more passive (and therefore formal and authoritative) policies.
As always, it’s an issue of trying out a few different ideas and seeing what works for you, what works for your students, and then continuing to reflect and refine.
Nels P. Highberg - January 12, 2010 at 6:40 pm
If anyone wants to see how I practice what I preach, I have just posted the syllabus for this semester’s Writing in Gender-Based Activist Organizations course on the course blog, which is here:
http://rpwgs340w.blogspot.com/
dance - January 12, 2010 at 12:57 am
As a very legalistic type with an extremely long syllabus that strives to pre-emptively answer any student question I have gotten more than once, I switched to the active informal voice (lots of “I” and “you”) a while back. It was the only thing I could do to mitigate the information I wasn’t willing to remove. In fact, my standard policies and procedures are written in the form of an FAQ.
I will point out, however, that the cost of personalizing a syllabus and making it pedagogical as well as procedural is making it longer, more text-heavy, etc. When I strive to condense, I risk hectoring. I somewhat balanced this out by putting the FAQ online and using lots of color and headings.
GC Fiedler—if things are important enough to explain the first day, why are they not worth writing down and including as part of the archive of the class?
Incidentally, I never hand out the syllabus until about 1/2 way through the first class, after I have had a chance to set the tone.
(PS. Language Log has lots of posts about how the obscural of agency is not actually what passive voice is.)
Nels P. Highberg - January 12, 2010 at 1:26 pm
Abby, I think you’re right about young teachers, especially those from particular cultural backgrounds. Also, if you are unhappy with a policy that is not yours but that you have to follow, yet you also feel odd pointing the finger (as in the absence policy I presented), then passive voice is useful, too.
And you’re so right about tone. It took me a long time to find the right balance for me.
Nels P. Highberg - January 12, 2010 at 2:06 pm
Dance, I go back and forth on how much of the syllabus to cover the first day. I know some people who don’t go over it until the second day and others who do not go over it at all but give a quiz on it. I do often try to start class with an activity to pull them into course content.
I like the FAQ idea, too. I’ve wondered about doing something similar on my regular website and then just putting a link on syllabi.