Truth in Advertising

I enjoy trolling Snopes.com for interesting stories about urban legends that sometimes end up being true. This advertisement for a philosophy position, which turned out to be real, caught my eye. It has bounced around higher-education Web sites before, but it’s worth a glance. It includes this classic sentence: “Our students tend to be poorly prepared for college level work, intellectually passive, interested primarily in partying, and culturally provincial in the extreme.” Apparently the ad was never intended to be posted, but when it was, it took on a life of its own, including several rounds of attention. Now it’s a great case study in the flukes and flaws of academic job postings.

If truth in advertising were applied in a draconian way, what might ads from your department include? What positive attributes might be articulated?