Note: This blog post was co-authored with John S. Wilson, the editor of Policy Diary (http://www.policydiary.com).
Lately, there have been numerous news stories about hate crimes, cyber bullying and harassment on college campuses. Unfortunately, there has been mostly talk and very little action. Until now. New Jersey Senator Frank Lautenberg (D) has thrown down the gauntlet to colleges receiving federal financial aid in a new proposal that will be introduced when Congress reconvenes in November: institute programs that teach about the effects of harassment or lose funds. The proposal is similar to the Student Nondiscrimination Act of 2010 that Lautenberg co-sponsored in January, which prohibits discrimination based on sexual orientation in public schools.
While an ultimatum may not be the best way to nudge institutions of higher learning in the right direction, Senator Lautenberg’s general idea is the right one. For far too many, the line between pranks and abuse is an invisible one. Frequently, victims are told to ‘man up’ or ‘get over it, it’s only a joke.’ And while it is true that college pranks happen regularly on campuses across the country and are often not seen as bullying, they are a form of bullying, especially when their aim is to humiliate and shame.
The result of bullying can be devastating for anyone but imagine if you were a young gay man or lesbian who had experienced aggressions on a regular basis and was protective of your sexuality due to the homophobia present in society. Eventually, you reach a breaking point and those college pranks become abuse with consequences.
Reaching the breaking point is not about gay and lesbian students being less able to deal with the stresses of everyday life. It is about abuse that goes unseen, unacknowledged, and unaccounted for due to a lack of understanding. It is about abuse that builds up over time and is often accepted by mainstream society. Unfortunately, some gay students are paying for this lack of understanding and abuse with their lives.
What can colleges do?
Frankly, as a society we do not do enough to teach young people about the effects of homophobia. And our lack of knowledge on the issue allows homophobia to exist and to foment. If there is ever a time to ensure that college students understand what bullying is and the effect it has on their peers, it is now. A recent analysis of over 70 studies, compiled over a thirty-year period, shows that students “scored 40 percent lower on a measure of empathy than their elders did.” According to a researcher involved with the analysis “It’s not surprising that this growing emphasis on the self is accompanied by a corresponding devaluation of others.” This is a profound statement about who we are as a nation and who we are becoming.
What is a college or university’s role in making sure that students understand what bullying and harassment are? And what kind of impact can colleges and universities have on gay or lesbian students? One approach could be creating sessions on bullying as part of orientation programs. Having a panel of students talk about their experiences– both as bullies and victims – to new students could be immensely powerful. Empathy is a feeling, of course, but it starts with communication and understanding.
And, what do we do with those who bully gay students and others? Colleges and universities need to explain how bullying has an impact on the entire community in addition to the students involved. Confronting bullying creates a stronger community. Colleges have wide latitude to dispense both education and discipline to bullies. Used appropriately, the campus judicial system can put the right amount of pressure on students to clean up their act and treat their peers the way they expect to be treated.
Colleges and universities that implement anti-harassment and anti-bullying programs can be leaders of a cultural change. We owe it to young people like Tyler Clementi to alter the perspective of young and old when it comes to bullying, especially the bullying of gay and lesbian students. It is not acceptable.
7 Responses to Where Pranks End and Abuse Begins
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williamsj - October 12, 2010 at 11:24 am
I agree with the author but I’m concerned that we don’t focus enough on bullying in general. It appears that only when bullying is associated with discrimination and particularly homosexuality does it seem to get attention. We tend to leave out the young people who are bullied because they are perceived to be too large or too thin, wear the wrong clothing or eat the wrong foods, etc. I’m glad that the problem is being addressed, I personally would like to see more people speaking up against bullying in any way, shape or form and for any and all reasons.
cop12 - October 12, 2010 at 11:58 am
Williamsj hits in on the head. As a parent of daughters from 16 to 27 I have watched and listen to the media that surrounds them and how it has created the social stigma that teasing and bullying is okay and cool. How can we expect our children to learn empathy when they see and hear “meaness” everyday on their TV shows to the banter of their DJ’s on the radio. The emotional scares left by bullying can last years. How many of us can still reaccount the times we were bullied or teased in full detail. Again as the author stated, “This is a profound statement on our nation and who we are becoming.” So sad.
22086364 - October 12, 2010 at 12:01 pm
I agree with williamsj. Bullying and tormenting are wrong, and we should, as parents, siblings, teachers, friends, supervisors, or whatever, both refrain from doing it and decry bullying behavior in others.
On the other hand, williamsj, I’d also suggest that while there’s general social disapprobation for racist and sexist jokes and belittling, homosexuals are, as a group, often considered fair game. Perhaps it’s because being gay, unlike being of a particular race or gender, is often invisible, allowing gay jokes to flourish, even with uncomfortable gays in the room hearing them. Then, emboldened, the joke-tellers feel themselves free to impinge upon the safety, dignity, or happiness of an ACTUAL gay person.
So, while I agree that all bullying is bad, I don’t think that the attention given to bullying against homosexuals (particularly these youngsters who are hurting themselves as a means of ending the hurt others are doing to them) is undue.
dank48 - October 12, 2010 at 5:05 pm
I find it interesting that bullying (on whatever pretext) seems to be considered quite separately from incidents of violence, such as Columbine. Bullying is no excuse for violence, but then difference is no excuse for bullying, and it wouldn’t seem strange to me if the oppressed sometimes could see no alternative to striking back extra-legally, especially as legal recourse seems impractical.
tizziec - October 15, 2010 at 7:52 am
I say, and call me old school here, but college is a place for academic study. If certain values have not been instilled in you by your family and school by then, well…. don’t make people pay for it in college. Students should be pressuring each other to make the social atmosphere tolerable. The college should not have to take it on. By that age it is up to the students to learn how to police themselves and others. Teach them to stand up for what they believe in, and the ones who HAVE been raised right will make sure those who haven’t learn quick. What colleges can do is simply hold their students to a high standard of personal conduct and stick to a defined planned of action for those who don’t. Make sure consequences are known and that they outweigh the risk of falling into ignorant or stupid behavior. The rest is on the student. At some point in life we have to be held responsible for our own actions and stop needing serrogate parents. Maybe it’s just that maturity levels have dropped and more kids should be waiting before they go to college.