A middle-school principal in New Jersey is getting attention for an e-mail message he sent out to parents a week ago with a stern request: get your kids off Facebook! Here is Principal Tony Orsini talking with George Stephanopoulis, and here is a portion of his e-mail:
“There is absolutely no reason for any middle school student to be a part of a social networking site! Let me repeat that—there is absolutely, positively no reason for any middle school student to be a part of a social networking site! None.”
On the TV show, he advises parents to remove computers from bedrooms. Since 90 percent of their homework does not require a computer, he notes, they don’t need it everywhere they go. He claims, too, that “The threat to your son or daughter from online adult predators is insignificant compared to the damage that children at this age constantly and repeatedly do to one another through social networking sites or through text and picture messaging.”
He and his staff try to coach students in responsible social networking, but parents seem to be clueless. They have told eight parents recently that their children sent inappropriate content through Facebook. Five of those parents claimed their children didn’t have a Facebook account—they were wrong. Three kids admitted the day before that they told their parents that they had indeed closed their accounts. They hadn’t.
His actions aren’t a case of alarmism. They are a rational response to a rising burden. One counselor at the school says that 75 percent of her time is devoted to social networking issues with students. More and more time and resources have to be steered toward managing the consequences. Middle school is bad enough—it’s the point at which peer pressure and adolescent tribalism cranks up well past the students’ emotional capacity to handle them—but with social networking the worst social elements have a whole new weaponry in place.
19 Responses to A School Pushing Back Against Facebook
jffoster - May 5, 2010 at 3:16 pm
I certainly carry no brief for Facebook or My Space or their ilk, and I wish the good principal well and success — as long as the request remains a request and does not take on the semblance or penalties of an order. It’s a little closer to that than one might like. In his original email to parents (gotten through links above) he says: ‘ will be more than happy to take the blame off you as a parent if it is too difficult to have the students close their accounts…”But he can’t take the heat. The parents have legal authority to close or have the students / pupils close their accounts but the Principal of a public school does not. The parents will have to take the heat for a decision I join the principal in hoping they, excepting extraordinary and unusual circumstances, make.
ksledge - May 6, 2010 at 7:39 am
The principal says there is no reason a middle school student should not have a social networking account. Is there any reason ANYONE should have a social networking account? (full disclosure: I have one)
iris411 - May 6, 2010 at 8:46 am
sounds like the principal is over reacting … I’d like to know what inappropriate stuff provoked him banning fb…
tgroleau - May 6, 2010 at 9:05 am
No reason at all? I guess Mr. Orsini lives in a place where every child comes home from the maternity ward and lives in the same house until they finish middle school.The rest of us live in a world where families are highly mobile. Sites like Facebook allow kids to stay in touch with friends from all over the country (or even the world).I agree that computers should not be in kids’ bedrooms, but I don’t see a problem with using a Facebook account on a computer in the family room. I just make sure that I’m one of my kid’s friends (I also know their password). With Facebook I can see the conversations between them and their friends far more easily than I can with text messaging.
lexalexander - May 6, 2010 at 9:44 am
[[Is there any reason ANYONE should have a social networking account?]]Sigh.Yeah. Marketing. And that’s just one.
lexalexander - May 6, 2010 at 9:46 am
That said, FB’s increasingly cavalier treatment of its customers’ privacy concerns is pushing me toward ending all non-work use and looking around for alternatives for work.
kffdn - May 6, 2010 at 9:58 am
Facebook is a total waste of time. Nearly all of my friends who have accounts admit that very little interaction takes place. Each user simply uses it as a platform to attempt to demonstrate that they are “deep” or “intelligent” or whatever they’re not.My wife left Facebook because none of her friends actually ever respond to one another. They all simply post about themselves.I have watched Facebook turn my fifty-something mother-in-law (a once strong, confident woman) into a hyper-paranoid tween girl who is now completely unsure of herself. Users of Facebook (and all the other ridiculous social networking sites) are shallow, sniveling little brats who can’t understand why the world doesn’t “value” them. (How’s that for a blanket statement?)Kids, parents, grandparents, get off these worthless sites and contribute something to this world. Perhaps then you’ll find the respect you’re looking for.
wordymusic - May 6, 2010 at 11:25 am
I believe that social networks have a value proportional to the people in them.
rachelgawn - May 6, 2010 at 4:30 pm
Blanket statement indeed, kffdn. Facebook is just a tool like any other. It’s not a place for real communication. It’s better used as a catalyst. Only tweens take it seriously and then, hopefully, they grow up.
girolamis - May 6, 2010 at 6:15 pm
kffdn-How do you really feel? Do you want to talk about it? Sheesh, chill out.IMHO we all need to stop telling each other what to do. I can’t really put my finger on it, but I have really noticed it lately. We are all just a little too up in each others’ business. Wouldn’t you rather shape your child’s use of Facebook and similar tools rather than forbid its use all together? Are we all that naive? Clearly its use and place in your child’s world is a complex issue but hey, no one said parenting was easy. Forbidding its use is the wrong response. I would rather help shape behavior. Let them use it, shape its use. Help them understand.
skittler - May 6, 2010 at 7:35 pm
I let my students know that employers routinely “google” prospective employees as part of the hiring process. Granted my students are college age, but it is amazing what people choose to share with the world.
markbauerlein - May 7, 2010 at 8:25 am
On that point, skittler, a military officer who works on a base told me after a lecture recently that in the personnel office they now toss out 20 percent of applications before they even read pass the name and address at the top. They Google their names and they look at their Facebook page, and anything dicey or compromising disqualifies the candidate. It could be a five-year-old photo, an indiscreet remark, things 18-year-olds wouldn’t even think is hazardous.
goxewu - May 7, 2010 at 8:59 am
Let’s see now. The military tosses out applications from those who’ve made Facebook gaffes, but because they can’t recruit enough people, they lower the bar with regard to high-school dropouts and criminal records. Good thinking. No wonder some wag once said that “military intelligence” is an oxymoron.
quebecprof - May 7, 2010 at 11:49 am
In the last year I have witnessed teenage girls “swarm” a girl on the internet sending mobile messages to one another through phones and facebook to create her ” slut” reputation. In a middle school facebook was used for a large group of boys to decide which sexual assault they would pull each Monday (one example was to touch the breasts of the female students). Another student who left her school due to cyber bullying was met with her problem at the new school as the gossip was able to travel faster than she was.I have a facebook account, and find it very enriching as I have moved far from many loved ones and we can keep in touch with each others lives in a very efficient way- but handing over the exact same technology to children who are by definition still learning what their impact is on others- is ludicrous. Not to even mention the potential impact of some of the things they post about themselves… I would argue that the need for social responsibility towards our youth/ vulnerable populations on the internet that is pretty obvious. A little responsibility is needed.
markbauerlein - May 7, 2010 at 12:29 pm
I think the kind of jobs the military man was speaking of were in technology, security, logistics, etc.
cpri2405 - May 7, 2010 at 2:43 pm
How come I can’t “like” any of these comments or reply to them?
rosmerta - May 10, 2010 at 11:37 am
I completely agree with quebecprof. I too find Facebook very enriching – I not only keep up with family, but I’m getting to know cousins and others I see very seldom. But it’s true that parents need to be very careful with their kids and Facebook, or any such social medium. Responsibility is the key.
jcla8791 - May 10, 2010 at 3:27 pm
A useful rule when unsure of an answer on a multiple choice test is to eliminate the answers with “always” and “never”. This would probably apply to FB usage. Moderation is key.@ cpri2405 – lol
paievoli - May 14, 2010 at 7:36 am
Very simple. Each school should have its own social network structure. The schools can admin it themselves. Cutting down on the time because it is proportional to the amount of students in the school. They can use them for academic needs not ridiculous social commenting. Have a section for social meetings just moderate it. Here is where your honor students and peer moderation students come in. Prgress to the 21st century. This too can be solved.