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Academics: Get Thin and Sexy in Only Six Hours A Day!

February 24, 2013, 2:42 pm

tim-mcgraw-2-300There are so many things I could, should, and want to be writing about, but until I get Tim McGraw out of my head, it’s not happening.

As the People magazine cover story by Alicia Dennis (February 2 2013) points out, Tim is “Sexy and Sober at 45” (and not coincidentally on the brink of his Two Lanes of Freedom tour, which launches in Vegas on March 1.) I’m sorry I can’t hook you up to the whole article, and I am even sorrier that I cannot thieve the photograph of the bare chested, tanned and chiseled Tim, with a ripply eight pack and absolutely no fat between his abdomen and his hip bones (how do I know this? His jeans are balanced slightly north of his pubes.) Check out another pic below the fold.

Like all of us who are (way) over 40, Tim woke up one day and discovered that the party was over and that he had gained about forty pounds. In fact, it sounds like he was an alcoholic:

“I wasn’t a beer drinker. I was more a whiskey drinker. And I wouldn’t just have a drink. If I was going to drink, I’d have some drinks,” says McGraw. 

“People were worried about me. It was to the point where I felt it was negatively affecting my relationships and getting in the way of things I wanted to accomplish in life. So I quit.”  

It sounds like an ultimatum from Tim’s superstar wife, Faith Hill, right?

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Shirtless Tim by sneaky paparazzi

In addition to not drinking, and getting all the wheat, fat and sugar out of his diet (“another skinless chicken breast with kale, please!”), for the last five years, McGraw has been working out three times a day, for a total of 6 hours. When he has a show that night, he only works out twice. Sample workout schedule and daily menu chez McGraw-Hill can be viewed here.

OK. This is what stopped me dead. Six hours a day of working out? I have to thank Tim McGraw and People magazine for this bit of information, since the takeaway here is that if you are going to look thin, cool and sexy in middle age, you have to make working out and eating a full time job. Taking on a little staff doesn’t hurt either: a cook and a trainer would be a good start. This would, perhaps, be right for Tim McGraw, or any other aging country star, since being sexy and beautiful is what they do for a living.

But for we university academics? Or anyone else with a full time desk job? Not a chance, and being hunky is not what we do for a living. So while I doubt seriously that my efforts at physical self-improvement will end, I now realize that it is impossible for me to look like the fantastic me I have always imagined could emerge from middle aged person who has become padded in all the middle aged places.

Thank you People, thank you Tim McGraw.

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