Com’on everbody, ligten up. Wats so bad about email? People keep acting like its the end of civilization, but get real. I mean, if ur gonna be stuck in Austenland, or if ur one of those with fustian prose who cant stand the dekline of english, I spose there’s no hope 4 uBut if u wanna get ur thoughts out fast, have a gud time with ur friends and revel in the anythinggoes of it all, embrace ur inner email self.

No txtng. Thats an entirely dif matter cuz it takes deft thumbs (mine, 4 xample, are 2 big).

An wen I say email ’m not talking bout the university emails telling u bout how the north parking lot is closed, or the plant department telling u when the next fire drill will be or how ur not sposed to keep ur windows open. Fokes, those are the emails meant for that lil key on the upper rite of ur keyboard that says delete,

Im talkin bout qwikly telling friends watsup, answering a phone call in fifteen secs as opposed 2 30 mins on the phone yakking away with someone u don’t really want to talk 2 at the moment. It’s also a perfect place to handle delicate sitches like family crises over where 2 spend the holidays—u know, whose house, what time, who brings wat and all that stuff. And it’s the best place I know where u can jus let go an use that inventive speling ur kid used when they first started mucking up learning back in the late 70s.

Well, actually there actually is another place where u can muck up everything even better—the world of im. that’s where u can really leggo and just bang out whatever piece of younowat with ur friends.. I mean, obviously im has dragged down the high-email form I used 2 use, but I 4one still luv im. Boom, popup, theres ur longlost girlfriend asking wazzup. TPlus that’s where no one ever holds back from bad bad writing and speling, and in my case anyway, everyone I talk 2 on im uses reely bad bad talk, I mean overthetop stuff that wont see the day otherwise even with a glasso wine.

Plus how else to keep up with ur faraway daughter, or qwikly find out wat time dindin is? Im is fab, more fab than email in sum ways!

Plus look at it this way, email and im together form the ebonics uf our day. U can always go back to riting real nice, anytime, but when u go back after email or im ur riting is really freshened up an u rite like a bird!

Im being serious that I really do luv to email. the advantages of instant grat like the phone but not having to listen to the return fire. Plus I almos forgot. U get 2 do like Spanish, no subject pronouns if you don’t wanna. Anyway, the big deal is that it reinvigorates the language, esp.the way it brings in fonetic speling and free association—I mean whered james joyce get his stuff from anyway without having email and im? Dunno, when I think about it he musta had an email/im mind be4 there was sucha thing.