I am beginning to feel some sympathy for Teresa Heinz Kerry, wife of the Democratic presidential candidate, John Kerry. Her role is apparently to just sit down and shut up lest she appear too intelligent, or say something to hurt her husband's chances for the presidency.
In my previous columns about my search for an administrative job in college marketing and communications, I have mentioned the fact that my husband is a college president. While I do not equate my role to that of Teresa Heinz Kerry (and please don't ever call me a first lady), it is a social role in my community that carries a lot of responsibility.
My husband works for a good-sized community college in a large metropolitan area dense with community colleges. We have a number of social obligations at the city, state, and regional level, in addition to meetings with legislators, the governor's office, and elected officials. While I enjoy my role as the president's spouse, I would still like to carve out my own professional niche, preferably as an administrator at a community college. Unfortunately, my job search -- going on nine months now -- has been rather stagnant lately. I think I know why.
We moved to the Pacific Northwest close to four years ago from a small Midwestern college where we met and both worked. This is my husband's second stint as a president (with a job in between as a vice president). Our move, in part, was dictated by the fact that our personal relationship was rather controversial for the small town where we worked. My husband is 23 years older than I am and for some people in those parts, it was just too "scandalous" a relationship. In addition, I worked as a director of the career center at the college, he as a vice president, and to certain people, I was just trying to "work my way up" the proverbial ladder (wink, wink). It was time to move.
We spotted the ad for the presidency of his current community college, and he made a run for it. Just a whirlwind month later, he had risen quickly to the top of a pile of candidates, and then to the shortlist of six interviewees, and finally the top choice. We were thrilled to make the move and start our new life together. We were married shortly after arriving, and not only did our relationship not garner a second glance here, his entire board attended our wedding. In our new location there are just about as many same-sex relationships as "May-December" relationships, so we pretty much fit the status quo.
We enjoy our life here, and my husband's position is happily still in the honeymoon stage after four years. But now it's time for me to work on getting my professional life settled. I had landed an administrative position at a small liberal-arts Christian college in the area, but quit nine months ago out of boredom and because of a long commute. Since then, I have had several interviews, so I know that my credentials and my written materials are getting my foot in the door. However, once again, I am finding that my relationship is making it difficult for me professionally.
I frequently mingle with many of the college presidents and administrators in the area, so I always hear about job openings. Moreover, almost daily, I scour the Web sites of institutions that I am interested in. In some cases I feel I have been passed over once word gets around that "Byers' wife" is in the applicant pool. Let me give two examples.
As I mentioned in my last column, I had applied for a position as director of a consortium of institutions. The job involved working with three local colleges (including my husband's) and seven local school districts. In the position, I would have reported to a college other than my husband's.
I was one of two finalists for the job. While I don't think that I was at my very best in my final interview, I certainly had done well enough. Several members of the search committee told me so. I did not get the job. Afterward, I heard informally from several sources who said that members of the search committee worried that I had a "conflict of interest."
I found that exasperating because I had specifically asked up front if my relationship would be an issue, and had been told that it would not.
At another local two-year college, I applied for an opening that had the exact job title that I had held previously but offered more responsibility. The position was on the president's administrative team and involved handling the marketing, public relations, and communications for the entire college. (In my previous job I had overseen marketing at just one division of a college.) In addition, the salary was almost $20,000 more than what I had been paid in my last job -- definitely a step up.
The position looked like it would be both challenging and fun. I had more experience and better academic credentials than the job ads stipulated. Unfortunately, I didn't even get an interview. The back story is that my husband's college has been engaged in a few turf battles over the years with this college and its president.
Maybe I'm paranoid. Maybe I'm not as qualified as I think that I am. Maybe I just didn't do a good job with my application materials.
But my gut tells me that none of that is the case. I think people here like me just fine in the role of "president's spouse," but fear that if they hired me, I might be inclined to share "inside" marketing information about their institutions with my husband, and ultimately hurt their enrollments. It really is quite ludicrous, since community colleges in the area are bursting at the seams.
Eventually, I hope that some local college will give me a shot and that not every administrator feels threatened. In fact, one other president happily reviewed my credentials for a potential grant-supported position and stated in a public setting, "I'd be thrilled to have Hannah on my team!" Unfortunately, the grant never came through.
In his sermon last Sunday, our pastor said that we should stop asking God for that great "sign" about what we are supposed to do with our lives. Instead, we should look for him to give us enough information about what we are supposed to do, and be patient about making decisions. I think that I will wait for him to do just that. Maybe what I am doing right now -- freelancing from home, taking care of puppies, cooking, and sharing my new life with my husband -- is enough.
