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Rebecca Goldstein's New Satire of Academic Life Puts 'the Antic Back in Pedantic'

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The best academic satire you are likely to read this year is not strictly an academic satire at all. Rebecca Newberger Goldstein's new novel, 36 Arguments for the Existence of God, published by Pantheon this month, explores the circuitous paths people travel in search of belief. Most of the truth seekers in Ms. Goldstein's novel have academic affiliations, some more illustrious than others, and on one very funny level the novel is a field guide to greater and lesser forms of academic life.

I called up Ms. Goldstein to talk about 36 Arguments, academic satire, and novels of ideas. She was at home in Cambridge, Mass., where she lives with her husband, the Harvard cognitive psychologist Steven Pinker. This is a good time to mention that Ms. Goldstein is a Princeton-trained analytic philosopher, an expert on Spinoza who has taught philosophy and writing at Barnard, Columbia, Tufts, and her graduate alma mater, among other places. Her previous novels include The Mind-Body Problem (Random House, 1993) and Properties of Light: A Novel of Love, Betrayal, and Quantum Physics (Houghton Mifflin Company, 2000). Her accolades include one of the MacArthur Foundation's so-called genius awards.

Her new novel's subtitle, A Work of Fiction, gives you some idea of where Ms. Goldstein stands on the question of whether God exists. As a novelist, though, she's perhaps less interested in the answer than in who's doing the asking.

"Every piece of fiction I've written, they've all grown out of some philosophical issue I've been thinking about, and I start thinking about embedding them in a story," she says. Her characters do not embody ideas, they dig into them, argue over them. She is perfectly happy to have two characters spend most of a dinner scene exploring the spiritual and ethical ramifications of the quest to live for 500 years.

Ideas matter in Ms. Goldstein's novels, and that's the root of her particular brand of satire. It's born more of disappointment that deep thinkers can run so shallow than of Kingsley Amis-style wrath.

An evisceration of academic foibles, á la Amis's Lucky Jim, is not what she's aiming for. "There are barbs in some of my portrayals, maybe because I believe in this so much that I feel personally betrayed when I see ego taking over," she told me. "I don't think this is a pointless exercise, thinking for a living. I believe in it fervently."

Her satirical impulses fasten on what she calls a kind of "poignant absurdity" that sometimes besets intellectuals. "Even people who are thinking very big—their whole lives are devoted to intellectual pursuits—and are sometimes even heroic in their intellectual endeavors, can be extremely limited, clueless, pitiful," she said. "I never feel that I'm being completely satirical, although I know it can come off that way. There are sins of professional thinking, sins we can fall into as professional thinkers, but they're very poignant."

A Professor's Progress

Cass Seltzer, the hero of 36 Arguments for the Existence of God, shares Ms. Goldstein's belief that the life of the mind is a life worth living. The forty-something Cass is a professor at Frankfurter University, a middling institution of higher learning just down the road from the greener pastures of Harvard.

Cass might have gone on thinking his way through a life of comfortable obscurity. But life changes when his most recent book, The Varieties of Religious Illusion, catches a zeitgeist wave, rides it onto The New York Times best-seller list, and lands its author the pop-culture title of the "atheist with a soul."

His surprise hit brings him other blessings (even Cass might use that word), such as a plum job offer from Harvard and the company of Lucinda Mandelbaum, a brainy bombshell whom Cass calls the Goddess of Game Theory. Unlike mathematically inclined Lucinda, Cass remains "knee-deep in the swampy humanities," but at least he's now got a high-powered agent helping him wade through the swamp: Sy Auerbach, who has "an agenda that goes beyond putting the 'antic' back in 'pedantic' and the 'earning' back in 'learning.'" It helps that Cass is decent, tall, and good-looking, with "the sweetest, most earnest smile this side of Oral Roberts University."

All of this is sketched out with a zest for the tics and hiccups of faculty life, the jockeying for status, the small slights and larger betrayals, the death-by-minutiae that is a faculty meeting. But Ms. Goldstein reserves her most devastating academic portraiture for Cass's mentor/persecutor, Jonas Elijah Klapper, the jowly, fleshy, egomaniacal Extreme Distinguished Professor of Faith, Literature, and Values at Frankfurter. Any reader who has sat in on a seminar run by a quotation-spouting Academic Eminence will recognize Klapper's type. He delivers lectures "in the very voice of Western civilization." His courses have titles like "The Manic, the Mantic, and the Mimetic." He hates theory almost as much as he loves to quote at length from his admittedly prodigious memory. "There is only one theory," he intones, "and it is the theory you shall pull bloody from the afterbirth of your own self."

If Klapper has a religion, it's himself. "Goethe had settled for being a genius, the professor had whispered, and Cass's spine had tingled, as it always tingled when the professor's voice dropped down to a trembling hush, even when Cass had no idea what Professor Klapper meant, as he so often had no idea what Professor Klapper meant." Cass's ex-girlfriend Roz, a zesty anthropologist and seeker of eternal youth, calls the Extreme Distinguished Professor "the Klap."

Ms. Goldstein insists there is no single real-life model for Klapper—readers will undoubtedly supply their own—but she has seen the cults of personality that grow up around "these charismatic figures with their utterances," who speak "as though they're handing down the truth from on high." Even for Klapper, though, Ms. Goldstein reserves a hint of sympathy, a sense that his is a noble calling gone off the rails. Call it satire with a soul.

Comments

1. supertatie - January 29, 2010 at 09:25 am

Gosh, I am just curious - does anyone who is not Jewish live in Ms. Goldstein's universe (her real one, or her fictitious one)? Everything about this book, including its author, its premise, and its review, strikes me as staggeringly provincial: "Hi! Here we are, all of us self-important Jewish intellectuals, exploring the lint in our belly buttons, boring ourselves silly making a living educating you lesser mortals, and concocting pedantic obscurantist theories intended to make everyone else feel inadequate while masking our deepest insecurities."

It sounds positively awful.

2. maw57 - January 29, 2010 at 09:50 am

I'm sorry, supertate #1: who did you say was provincial?

3. superdude - January 29, 2010 at 11:54 am

I agree with supertatie. This is the sort of tripe that gives academics a bad reputation.

4. fergbutt - January 29, 2010 at 12:15 pm

Newsflash: Academics already have a bad reputation.

5. mothergrogan - January 29, 2010 at 01:05 pm

I think I will stick with Richard Russo's Straight Man as the best academic satire in recent years. This one really sounds as though it is of little interest to those of us beyond the Cambridge ambit.

6. boncoeur - January 29, 2010 at 01:52 pm

I haven't found this author's works terribly interesting, overall, so I most likely won't read this latest work. It may just be that she jumps around a lot and keeps her treatment light, which is sometimes appropriate for satire, of course. My impression is that she commits herself to no particular point of view, and so it's all "fun" and "games." That's a choice she makes,and there is room in the exploding market on educational critiques for a work that plays it all lightly. For this reader, the stakes are too high, and while I love a satirical work that has an underlying argument of sorts, time is too precious to dally with stuff I think is silly. However, Mr. Wonderful, from a few comments back, I take issue with what are clearly anti-semitic remarks on your part. Having completed grad school at an ivy league school myself, I can assure you that the egotistical slime ball professors who consider their own theory as the only one students should even bother reading because all the others are tripe--they come in every stripe and color, and every ethnicity and gender. In fact, I can think of five profs that share that quality of egotism taken to the extreme, and not one of them happens to be Jewish. And don't think I am just a Jew defensive about my own ethnic group: I'm not of Jewish heritage, but if I were, I would be proud, in the most honorable sense of that word. Let's keep bashing of any ethnicities, colors, and all those sites of supposed difference out of these comments, and strive to overcome whatever bigotry might come up for us in a moment of inattention. I would truly value that effort.

7. gtkarn - January 29, 2010 at 09:08 pm

Haven't read this book, but academic satires are a genre unto themselves and there are probably dissertations existing or to follow.

If you are looking for something more celebratory and moving about an academic (no, it's not "MR. CHIPS") try John Williams's novel, STONER. Something refreshing in a cynical age.

As far as # 5"s praise of Russo, readers must decide for themesleves. To me it was lots of cheap shots and can't hold up to comparison with David Lodge.

8. honore - January 30, 2010 at 08:34 pm

In this rant, Goldstein was definitely channeling the proto-typical desperately-seeking-coolness drones in Madison, Wisconsin. All the attendant cliches of the self-absorbed, ultra self-consciously insipid and inane East and West coaster neurotics who never seem to tire of their endless references to "when I lived in Soho, blah,blah,blah", "in Chicago, I had this guy who....(shined her/his shoes just so, always opened the door for them with the biggest smile...), "since I left Cambridge (MA) I just haven't been able to find just the right place for an afternoon "knosh". And lest I forget..."when I was in Cape Cod 5 years ago(Martha's Vineyard of course), I had the best barrista on the Island who made the most incredible fleur-de-lis patterns in my triple lattes.

YUCK!!!! I left these idiots behind in NYC and never have I found myself missing any of them ever!. I think I miss stepping in steaming dog poop on 5th Avenue more. Goldstein you are such a stereo-type. Enjoy your next knosh at JFK...ugh.

9. jsjacobs - February 02, 2010 at 11:12 am

@honore
Please don't lump the innocent nosh in with your other perceived symbols of cosmopolitan snobbery.
Btw I really didn't see any ranting in Goldstein's statements in the article. Your comment tho packs in a fair bit of ranting into a small space.
Enjoy a delicious nosh, wherever you are, hopefully far away from mean academics!

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